Question for the ENTJs/INTJs

[Meyer]

If possible please describe your general mindframe in social situations. Do they differ whether it is work compared to say a party?

The reason I ask is I usually score borderline on I/E and I'm trying to figure out which one is more dominant? I know alot of it is said to be related to what energizes you but that confuses me also. Idle chitchat bores the shit out of me and drains me. The only way I can get into parties is if I look at them as a chance to sharpen some social skills. Productive interaction however does seem to energize me. Interacting productively while working towards some sort of goal makes me crave more action. ENTJs Do you ever feel inept in non- work related social situations such as small talk or mingling?

[Santana28]

i'm probably borderline I/E myself... i'm much more internally focused on myself though, and i dont need the external clues to help me reach conclusions as much as i've noticed E's do.

it really depends on the situation. in social situations i am absolutely miserable and count the minutes until i can escape. if i HAVE to, i can play along alright and fake a bit... but it takes SO much out of me.

but in the very rare instances where i am with people i am completely comfortable with - i turn into a jabbermouth extrovert, and have absolutely no problems speaking my mind. also in the rare situations where i am truly in a leadership position, i am also capable of speaking with great confidence and dealing with things socially. but the casual social situations i can't stand... so i guess that makes me much more of an I than an E, who can move in and out of those situations fluently.

[Danisty]

I'm a strong introvert and I'm really never energized by being around others. The best I can really hope for is to not feel completely drained. If I'm with a few close friends and we're doing something fun (like roleplaying), I feel very energized, but that's because of the creativity and not so much because I'm around other people. It could be that you're energized by working productively with people because they're playing the game you're great at. I'm assuming you wouldn't enjoy it if it wasn't productive.

[RoqueBear]

I am border line I/E. However, I do describe myself as introverted and situationally extroverted.

My general mind set depends on my situation. In structured situations my extrovertedness will express itself. This has been very apparent in school, work or some organizations I've been apart of. I am often asked to be a leader or some type of representative in these situations. My intuition, thinking, logic and ability to make judgment calls serves me well in these positions. I do quite a bit of talking and perceive the outcome in situations before they're a possibility. mental chess almost.

I have friends who know me mostly in this way and to them, they think I'm very extroverted. I might say that a lot of it is in the presentation. I'm still critical with my thoughts and judgement, perhaps more vocal about it. I don't have a problem pushing the "team" harder for whatever reasons. I use my intuition to perceive how I need to present what I want to get what I need is important also, tact can be very important to understand.

On the flip side. If you put me in a bar, party or random crowded area I don't know how to react or relate to people. I guess you could say the variables become to great for me to perceive well. It is difficult at times to close the door and heard people away. Very often those who think I'm extroverted think that I'm anti-social, depressed or "need to go out". I don't like to make small talk at all about things I can pick up with keen enough observation. My humor is dry and not the life of the party goof ball people like. I can definitely get lost in my own thoughts there, which are usually parts of bigger thoughts. I have lots of acquaintances, but only a few I'd call on as close friends in an emergency. I value quite time highly.

When I drink or get drunk, that can be different. My intuition crashes hard and its like the filter between my brain and mouth comes off. The wheels quit turning significantly, which is appealing in its own, for a while. I throw out only half baked ideas, which people find funny. I can be seen as extroverted here and just won't stop talking.

[Uytuun]

I too am borderline E/I. Not a doubt to the fact that I'm an I first and foremost, though

Hmmm...I think I get excessively E out of I sometimes, if that makes sense.

I have friends who know me mostly in this way and to them, they think I'm very extroverted.

I think I have that too. I can be very talkative and ENTJ-ish...a bit arrogant, bossy maybe...or no, leaderish. With some people, you immediately know that they follow and you are supposed to lead. I think I have this mostly with INFx and in school/work situations.

Sensors can really confuse the hell out of me, or intimidate me even...I get a lot more reserved and shy around them, I find it extremely hard to communicate with them...if they are ST, it works out better. It's really strange, the extent to which S/N makes a difference in feeling at ease around people.

I think that even when I'm introverterted, my well-established self-confidence turns it into some wicked INTJ kind of shyness...it's not the cuddly shyness of an INF, so to speak.

When I'm with friends, I'm more outgoing than when I'm alone.

In almost all instances being E asks an effort, complete with physical symptoms.

[mind_wander]

Well for me, I am like a borderlined I/E, also. It depends on the situations, like people had wrote here. Outside, I am the quiet quick and efficient INTJ, but the inside is the true ENTJ. My internal ENTJ side always wants to come out and play, like hitting some common sense into people's heads numerous times. Its like a mental war inside, telling my ENTJ side to please shut up because they are not ready for you yet. Lol. when the time comes, like leadership, ok ENTJ side comes out naturally. This is the easiest way to explain this.

It also depends on situations too, most of the times I only listen up, like someone explained, "S's bored the hell out of me" why is that? They speak one language and we speak another. So its not, like we're on the same page, excluding ISTJ, on that note. No problem, in this area. When I talk figurative abstracts, people will wonder, WTF are you talking about sometimes. Now, thats a good indication, they are S types, not N types. Now, I also observed that some S types would ignore some weirdo's, in the room. Spreading gossip, like this dude or girl is out of the norm. It makes me wondered alot, hmm, let me try what is this person all about? Yeah, that weirdo is an N type personality most of the times; very quiet and spontanously, too. They are very quiet because the norm, don't like you, but when you come there they willing to shared their world with ya. That person gets the feeling, at least someone here appreciates me, for just me; not for a weirdo label. I think thats the nice thing about an INTJ way of thinking; we accept all the above and put somethings into consideration.

In my mind, it plays devil's advocate all the time, tons of mind tricks what is reality? what is fanasty? Should I do this? What is reality in my mind and no one follows this? :( Its more efficient and get the job done within maybe 2 days, instead of 2 weeks period. Thats the facts of life, we all have to deal with, as an INTJ. As for the quietness side is probably the most difficult because they can't hear your thoughts. Since your too calm and out of the norm, so people like you to be more Extroverted. I always asked myself, "People, do you know the old saying becareful what you wished for-R.L Stine." Once you wished it and granted, now people please do not complain about my aggorant insults about your way of doing this, illogical, how you dress, etc. etc. Its a door, some people do not want to really explore, well in my mind that is because its powerful and hard hitting.

Thats pretty much it, oh yeah, for the people are more extroverted and has tons of problems, etc. etc. Yeah, they loved you because somewhere in the INTJ job description, eventually helped them sort it out, for them in a neat box.

[Solaris]

If possible please describe your general mindframe in social situations. Do they differ whether it is work compared to say a party?

The reason I ask is I usually score borderline on I/E and I'm trying to figure out which one is more dominant? I know alot of it is said to be related to what energizes you but that confuses me also. Idle chitchat bores the shit out of me and drains me. The only way I can get into parties is if I look at them as a chance to sharpen some social skills. Productive interaction however does seem to energize me. Interacting productively while working towards some sort of goal makes me crave more action. ENTJs Do you ever feel inept in non- work related social situations such as small talk or mingling?

I'm replying without reading other posts, so excuse any overlap.

To the bolded bit: Yes! I tend to want to have meaningful conversations, and usually will try to move the coonversation that way. I personally have a tendency to ask a lot of questions until I hit upon something that the person either shows a keen interest in, or something engaging that we have in common. This is not to say that I cannot be wild and silly (because I laugh * a lot *), but that's mainly with people I already know well. In social settings, I'm usually trying to figure out who everyone is, and how to interact with them most effectively. I really do keep a mental catalog of who has which talents and how I might use them later. Not that I use people, I just can't help but tally who knows what and who has which skills.

Try checking out the test on cognitiveprocesses.com if you haven't. It ranks your ability to use each of the preferences. The results might help you understand yourself a bit better. For instance, on the rum of the mill MBTI test, I will score ENTP or ENTJ, depending on my mood. When I take this test I see why that is (though it will often suggest INTP, even though my strongest preferences don't match it). I typically score highest in Te and Ne, then Ti, and Ni. So I can see parts of myself in ENTJ and ENTP. It might help you sort of out some things as well. It's been my experience that few people will fit cleanly into any one MBTI category, but will see enough of themselves in a particular one to think "hey, that's me."

Edit:

I can schmooze a crowd of people if I want to. There's really no challenge in it for me. Therefore, if I don't see a purpose, I don't bother. If I think I'll gain some meaningful interaction out of it, then I'll do it, if not, then not. I know that I am energized after being around people (it assures me I'm an E when I feel like eliminating all humans and realize I'll be lonely). I think that's the difference between ENTs and other Es -- I want meaningful interaction, not just interaction for the sake of interaction.

[mind_wander]

Yes! I tend to want to have meaningful conversations, and usually will try to move the coonversation that way. I personally have a tendency to ask a lot of questions until I hit upon something that the person either shows a keen interest in, or something engaging that we have in common. This is not to say that I cannot be wild and silly (because I laugh * a lot *), but that's mainly with people I already know well. In social settings, I'm usually trying to figure out who everyone is, and how to interact with them most effectively. I really do keep a mental catalog of who has which talents and how I might use them later. Not that I use people, I just can't help but tally who knows what and who has which skills.

You made a great point, yeah the higher you go up. Well, its kinda lonely up there. Its alright, thats why there are compatible or complimentary matches. Luckily or it would really suck, for you.

[LordHawk]

Hmm, not sure where I fit in this. I am new to this and have tested out twice to INTJ. I am quite introverted but around certain people I can open up and talk, sometimes to much to the point where I should shut up and let other people talk. In social situations, I have to be drug out or I'll find a side of the room and just watch. I tend to be empathic and pick up on the general mood of the place. I stay quiet unless I have something to say because whats the point of pointless talking?

[Doppelbock]

I'm a strong introvert and I'm really never energized by being around others. The best I can really hope for is to not feel completely drained. If I'm with a few close friends and we're doing something fun (like roleplaying), I feel very energized, but that's because of the creativity and not so much because I'm around other people. It could be that you're energized by working productively with people because they're playing the game you're great at. I'm assuming you wouldn't enjoy it if it wasn't productive.

What he said.

[ElGuyay]

I always look for a way to make them laugh. If you can't relate, might as well crack em up and see if it produces a friendship.

[AgentofGaming]

I'm a strong introvert and I'm really never energized by being around others.

Me too, sometimes it reaches a point such that when I'm not at home I always feel like going home and hiding in my room. I always feel the need to be alert around people, I guess that's why it's draining.

[James Revell]

i'm probably borderline I/E myself... i'm much more internally focused on myself though, and i dont need the external clues to help me reach conclusions as much as i've noticed E's do.

it really depends on the situation. in social situations i am absolutely miserable and count the minutes until i can escape. if i HAVE to, i can play along alright and fake a bit... but it takes SO much out of me.

but in the very rare instances where i am with people i am completely comfortable with - i turn into a jabbermouth extrovert, and have absolutely no problems speaking my mind. also in the rare situations where i am truly in a leadership position, i am also capable of speaking with great confidence and dealing with things socially. but the casual social situations i can't stand... so i guess that makes me much more of an I than an E, who can move in and out of those situations fluently.

In terms of the true use of Introversion on the MBTI I'm most definitely I, though not as extreme as some. I must have alone time to recharge, even if that occurs while working, reading, watching TV, or even some thought-based activity. It's a mental input thing. Technically, reading in a crowded place is enough as long as others can be tuned out.

While certainly somewhat reserved even around people I'm close to, I've never had a problem talking to individuals or small groups that I knew. I can certainly speak my mind and argue my points with the best of them. Over time I progressed to being able to deal with larger groups I didn't know as long as I was aware of shared purpose or commonality. This made it a bit easier at work than say large parties, but now I mainly socialize among a core group of 25-40 people and sometimes the 25-50 may occasionally attend.

My real Introversion issue in social situations, and slightly at work, is just having nothing I believe I need to say much of the time. I essentially don't engage unless I have a need to, and then I do perfectly fine. This can make small talk a bit of a chore, thus short telephone calls and long silences when driving with others.

[Ace1337]

I really do keep a mental catalog of who has which talents and how I might use them later. Not that I use people, I just can't help but tally who knows what and who has which skills.
I'm borderline ENTJ and INTJ, I scored 11 on introverted, and I do the same thing you mentioned. The first thing I do when I meet people is create a folder in my mind and write what they know, unconsciously. I know what other people's skills are and I always know what question they will know how to answer and what question they won't know.
I get drained if people that I'm talking to have no common interests with me and if I can't learn anything new from the conversation. I hate small talk.
I have about 1/3 of ENTJ traits and 2/3 of INTJ traits.

[ElstonGunn]

My real Introversion issue in social situations, and slightly at work, is just having nothing I believe I need to say much of the time. I essentially don't engage unless I have a need to, and then I do perfectly fine. This can make small talk a bit of a chore, thus short telephone calls and long silences when driving with others.

Me too. Like they say, talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand. Nine times out of ten, talking is a means to an end for me. I don't particularly enjoy conversation or socializing for its own sake. If there is something to be gained from it, I might partake, but only if it would be reasonably comfortable for me to do so.

[robin.]

I forget my I/E score, but I think it's definitely leaning towards I, although not too extreme. I enjoy being around people that I relate to, but the fact that I only relate to certain types of people that are few and far between makes it hard for me to enjoy socializing in general. When I'm with people I like, I can be with them for a long time without feeling drained during the process, and I definitely get energized by it (until it's over).

For example, I'm on my university's debate team, and tournaments last from Friday morning to Saturday evening. It's obviously a very social activity involving a lot of talking, but it's for a very constructive purpose and I really like everyone on my team. I can be pretty extroverted, although it's often difficult for me to approach people I don't know well on other teams, unless I'm introduced to them. (That's the I side, obviously.) I don't feel drained until Saturday evening when I walk into my dorm room. That's when I usually crash, and Sunday after church is often spent by myself in my room. I normally don't see anyone Sunday and am just kind of a hermit for a while. I never realize how much the tournaments take out of me until I finally am alone, and then I cherish the solitude.

When I'm not in productive, familiar social settings, however, I completely fail at socializing. I'm not good at small talk because, well...it's not very productive. I feel like if I don't have something important to say, why bother just BSing with someone? I do recognize, however, that sometimes friendships won't happen unless there's some initial small talk in the beginning, so it's often helpful if I try to look at it as something that actually is productive in the long run.

[INTJgal]

If possible please describe your general mindframe in social situations. Do they differ whether it is work compared to say a party?

The reason I ask is I usually score borderline on I/E and I'm trying to figure out which one is more dominant? I know alot of it is said to be related to what energizes you but that confuses me also. Idle chitchat bores the shit out of me and drains me. The only way I can get into parties is if I look at them as a chance to sharpen some social skills. Productive interaction however does seem to energize me. Interacting productively while working towards some sort of goal makes me crave more action. ENTJs Do you ever feel inept in non- work related social situations such as small talk or mingling?

I'm not an extreme introvert; I very much get excited and passionate in a lively way when I'm around people that I enjoy. I can handle People I Like for a loong time (record being around people 24 hours a day for a week while camping... REAL camping not fake camping). But then I hit the wall where I need to hibernate and really desire nothing more than to sit in my room/find a place outside where no one's around and sort through my thoughts for a solid 5 hours or something.

I also have ENTJ leadership skills and charisma. I put them into use often.

What sold me was simply the INTJ descriptions. INTJs know themselves so well, I think, that they will STRONGLY self-identify with the description. the ENTJ I just "share a lot of things with" whereas the INTJ description (murraystate/everythin2 most notably) I see myself.