Virginity and Alcohol

[Nomadofthehills]

I tend to avoid alcohol (21 male, virgin, never been drunk). I am curious as to the realtionship between virginity and alcohol consumption. Anecdotes are encouraged.

[Pcell]

I was drinking alcohol the night I lost my virginity, but I had decided I was going to do it with that person some time before. We stayed together for nearly 6 years after. I can be very quiet and shy and alcohol tends to loosen me up a bit, so on that fateful night, it made the deed happen more easily than otherwise. The fact I didn't care we did it in his car in front of my mom's room window is something that would have been noticed otherwise, but I didn't get busted, so..no harm no foul. :p

I also didn't feel much pain because I had been drinking, which helped in my case. I had tried doing it before and it had hurt too much to go through with it.

[Cincinnatus]

I drink alcohol regularly, but only have one or two drinks on a night out. In fact, I was as sober as a judge the night I lost mine. Can you really say mine was related to alcohol?

[Vagrant]

I've never combined alcohol and sex so far. Might be fun to try.

(Yes, I was obviously 100% sober when I lost my virginity)

[Ryokurin]

I think it depends on a host of events. Don't buy into the idea that alcohol makes everyone lose some inhibitions. With me for example, alcohol frankly does not do shit to stop anxiety. In fact it actually made me more cautious and likely to freeze on my triggers.

You might as well try it to see how you react, but I wouldn't try to get drunk to lose your virginity. It's just something that will happen. Believe me, the moment you try forcing something to happen is the moment you lose yourself.

[uneingenue]

i drank the night i first had sex, but i also knew i was going to have sex so i drank to keep my nerves calm. it didn't work!

[llBradll]

Not a virgin occasionally consume alcohol.

[thref23]

In my opinion, from what I generally see and feel, when you are drunk you end up doing what you really want to do, deep down.

To me, alcohol is a multiplier. If I kind of want to do something, I really want to do it if I am drunk. If I don't feel like doing something, I am less likely to give in if drunk. If I am in a good mood, alcohol results in a better mood. If I am in a bad mood, alcohol results in a worse mood (but I usually don't feel like drinking if in a bad mood). Of course, I think its naive to think that everything we want to do as humans is in our best interests, but...

A lot of people use alcohol as an excuse, I can't relate to that. No matter how drunk you get me, there are certain things I just won't do, period (and in fairness there are things I will do which will not necessarily be in my best interests, but if its what I want, its what I want). Part of what I love about alcohol is I feel that it shows you people's true colors (and your own true colors for that matter). This is where many "alcoholics" will take issue with me, but whatever.

I also find that I tend to be much sharper socially (and probably otherwise in some respects) when drunk, as long as I am sufficiently drunk but not too drunk. I am not only less introverted, but when sober I think way too much without acting, whereas when drunk there is a much better thought/action balance at play.

So you mention that I am actually talking off-subject to a degree....but I feel what I write can contribute to theoretical analysis here.

[Latro]

Option 2. Somewhat nice to see that it's the most common around here.

[JustMel]

I don't recommend losing your virginity while using alcohol. Too many chances of regret later and feeling like you might not have done it if you hadn't been drinking. Deciding to lose your virginity should be a conscience choice and not one you can look back and claim was a mistake because you were drunk.

Personally, I feel that if you have to drink to be able to have sex, you aren't ready to have sex, regardless of how old you are.

[Soobpar]

Alcohol definitely helped me lose my virginity, but it would have happened eventually regardless (although if I never boozed I probably never would have been in that situation or around the girl to begin with so it's hard to say). Alcohol helped me because A) The girl was cheating on her boyfriend and may or may not of done the same without alcohol, and B) Apparently I'm socially/sexually retarded and didn't even realize she wanted to have sex when she was on top of me naked... in fact she was convinced for weeks that I didn't even want to have sex with her despite the fact she was unbelievable hot...*shrug*. Take from this what you will, but I'd definitely say there's a strong correlation between drinking alcohol and losing your virginity. Although it could have more to do with the type of people typically involved than the act itself.

I don't recommend losing your virginity while using alcohol. Too many chances of regret later and feeling like you might not have done it if you hadn't been drinking. Deciding to lose your virginity should be a conscience choice and not one you can look back and claim was a mistake because you were drunk.

Personally, I feel that if you have to drink to be able to have sex, you aren't ready to have sex, regardless of how old you are.

Well for a lot of people they're ready to lose their virginity but just unable to make it happen, that's where the alcohol comes in.

[seraphicharm]

My alcohol consumption consists of a shot of Irish Cream or Amaretto in coffee maybe once a week. Still a virgin.

[Pcell]

Well for a lot of people they're ready to lose their virginity but just unable to make it happen, that's where the alcohol comes in.

I think it helped me, especially with the whole pain issue. I don't feel like it robbed me of anything, really. I remember it as an awesome experience.

Edit: I failed to mention that I wasn't drunk, but I had a couple drinks in me so I was a bit toasty. No sloppiness or passing out kinda stuff.

[LPM]

Drunk sex is something everyone should experience. And more than once.

But losing your virginity is different. If you're experienced with alcohol maybe a drink or two is fine. But I wouldn't recommend getting wasted to lose your virginity.

[Harmony]

Six years after I lost virginity is when I started drinking... For me alcohol didn't have anything to do with it. And really still doesn't.

[Synchronicity]

Been drunk. Been sexed. Never been drunk sexed. One day, perhaps, but it's not likely to happen anytime soon.

[Rho1334]

I lost my virginity sober as the day is long...

[PeterIMC]

I tend to avoid alcohol (21 male, virgin, never been drunk). I am curious as to the realtionship between virginity and alcohol consumption. Anecdotes are encouraged.

I think there's more of a relationship between alcohol consumption and not planned pregnancies. :)





PeterIMC added to this post, 1 minutes and 27 seconds later...

Drunk sex is something everyone should experience. And more than once.

But losing your virginity is different. If you're experienced with alcohol maybe a drink or two is fine. But I wouldn't recommend getting wasted to lose your virginity.

That's pretty much impossible even I think. Being drunk and not knowing what to do,..... guaranteed failure! lol

[Anona Miss]

I'm pretty sure there are studies of teenagers that show a correlation between early loss of virginity and early consumption of alcohol. If I remember correctly, the conclusion wasn't that if kids drank alcohol (and presumably got drunk), they'd run out and lose their virginity. Rather, it was that those kids who tend to be more impulsive and more willing to engage in risky behavior in general tend to do both early.

I lost my virginity before I started drinking. And like others have said, I definitely am glad I did not do that while I was drunk.

On the other hand, drunk sex with someone you love can be a lot of fun. My only problem with it has been that I sometimes I don't remember it later...and really wish I could. I do know that it tends to be a bit more adventurous...

[Macbeth]

I tend to avoid alcohol (21 male, virgin, never been drunk). I am curious as to the realtionship between virginity and alcohol consumption. Anecdotes are encouraged.

No link between those two things here. I've been sober every time I've had sex. Also, my personality doesn't change when I drink, at least it doesn't change significantly enough that anyone notices. I'm a little bit more friendly, but otherwise I've never done anything drunk that I haven't also done sober.

I don't really do "drunk" in any stereotypical way.

[Obsidean]

Second option

My friend was drunk when he lost his virginity, he threw up mid-way through. Would had sucked for the other guy

[lolernie]

Lost virginity before I ever started drinking. Know three people who are in the same boat.

[Hamsta]

I don't really drink. Never liked the taste, and knowing the adverse effects, I figured why bother. Under enough peer pressure I will partake (and make funny faces)

Still a virgin. Introversion, social phobia, over thinking things, perfectionism. You know what I'm talking about ;)

[MintOreo]

Never been drunk, never had sex and I drink very little. Wine with dinner every once in a while, that sort of thing.

[Elfrun]

They are two independent points for me and not related.

Option 2. Somewhat nice to see that it's the most common around here.

Why is it nice to see that most people are virgins who rarely use or do not use alcohol?

[Zirka]

Still a virgin, hell I haven't so much as kissed a guy. But I do drink on occasion, when I'm with my friends. Haven't gotten drunk yet.

[Latro]

Why is it nice to see that most people are virgins who rarely use or do not use alcohol?
Because it means I'm not an exception to the rule here, which culture (the media, mostly) would have me believe I am in the general population.

[charolastra]

My virginity and alcohol consumption are entirely independent of each other.

My family has always been fairly liberal and I was always encouraged to have sex and drink in moderation. Wine was found at family meals and if my parents made drinks, they'd make small ones for my brother and I once we hit our teens. As a result, neither my brother and I drink all that much. I don't think I really ever drank besides at a family event until I was 20 and living in a country where the drinking age was lower than that.

On the other hand, I lost my virginity when I was 17 and there was no alcohol involved. In fact, the one time I've ever been inebriated during a sexual act was when I announced to my ex that I had never had drunk sex and we decided to try the experience.

[dalidaisy]

I rarely drink alcohol. When I do, it tends to be a glass of wine or two (sometimes several). I've never been much of a drinker (or a drug user for that matter) & I haven't been a virgin for a very, very long time.

Oh, & I was not drinking when I lost my virginity. I have mixed alcohol & sex before, though, but it's not necessary & I actually prefer sex without alcohol intoxication.

[Sxq]

I wouldn't want to be drunk when I lost mine.
I do drink, but they've got nothing to do with each other as far as I go anyway.

[Merle]

I don't like having sex when I'm drunk... or even after just a couple of glasses of wine of an evening - it impedes certain reactions of the limbic nervous system for me... if you know what I mean.

That said, I did rely on alcohol as a way of helping me a be a bit more outgoing and forward when I was a teenager... so it probably had some part to play in me losing my virginity. Not in a "oooh, I'm wasted - let's have sex!" kind of way... but in that it allowed me to put myself into situations where a relationship leading to sex could happen kind of a way.

[Samoan Corleone]

I'm a virgin, but I double as a drunk on weekends.

[skycloud86]

23, male, hardly ever drink alcohol (I would say at the most 4-5 alchoholic drinks per annum).

[Nemesis]

Drunk sex is garbage. Terrible things have happened... unspeakable horrors.

[nacht]

I tend to avoid alcohol (21 male, virgin, never been drunk). I am curious as to the realtionship between virginity and alcohol consumption. Anecdotes are encouraged.

Confounding Variable: Age.

The median age for people to lose their virginity (societally) is roughly 16 in the United States. Alcohol consumption in the US has a legal barrier of around the age of 21.

This will account for a massive percent of the variance in any study (which, I feel obligated to mention, a web poll is not). If we limited the scope of a study to people under the age of 21, then that would be a rather interesting area of research.

[Mader]

Not drunk when I first had sex. Just decided to say yes to a boyfriend who was pushing. Curious maybe?

I don't care for the taste or effect of alcohol on me. I start to think I am much smarter than everyone in the room and become a bitch - at the time I think I am just saying the truth. This never made me popular.

[azelismia]

I was stoned the first time.

[Nomadofthehills]

Confounding Variable: Age.

The median age for people to lose their virginity (societally) is roughly 16 in the United States. Alcohol consumption in the US has a legal barrier of around the age of 21.

This will account for a massive percent of the variance in any study (which, I feel obligated to mention, a web poll is not). If we limited the scope of a study to people under the age of 21, then that would be a rather interesting area of research.

Hopefully on a forum for INTJ's, everyone knows this "poll" offers almost no real information.

Do you really think people wait to age 21 to drink?

[nacht]

Hopefully on a forum for INTJ's, everyone knows this "poll" offers almost no real information.


Actually, no, previous experiences on this forum have indicated that most people don't.


Do you really think people wait to age 21 to drink?

Some do, some don't, but that's not exactly relevant. The point is that drinking habits tend to change around that barrier.

There will be a shifted expected value for one as opposed to the other, and drinking levels are a dynamic state while virginal status is a static one. So someone who is in college is much more likely to both not be a virgin and drink more "regularly," someone who is 30 is exceedingly likely to not be a virgin and may or may not drink regularly.

An interesting study would be to limit the scope to people of high school age, combined with questions that can establish a socioeconomic distribution and attempting to ferret out spurious covariation from a potential common cause (for example: people in certain socioeconomic situations are more likely to start having sex earlier, and they are also more likely to start drinking earlier, but this doesn't mean that the latter in any way influences the former).

[Strawberry]

Do you really think people wait to age 21 to drink?

That and not everyone on this board is American. (Canadian, 19/legal and still haven't touched alcohol)

[paleoeco]

When I lost my virginity (to a guy) I was completely sober, and had never had more than a sip of alcohol at all (I was 14). When I first had sex with a girl in college (as an experiment) I was a bit drunk. Ok, I was sloshed. I become extremely horny and flirty when I get drunk, and there's very little I won't try if it gets me laid.

And, I do have to agree with LPM: I think everyone should try drunk sex at least once.