The Braggadocio

[navelgazer]

I have come to realize that one of my favourite art forms is the braggadocio - cocky, pretentious, outlandish bragging. This is part of my reason for loving rap music. I'm talkin' about the parts of the song (or the novel, or whatever) that I want to replay continuously - I just can't get enough!

Since some of you tend towards cocky, and enjoy word-play, I am hoping that some of you share this love. Post 'em if you got 'em.

Give up all you suckers we the tightest mutherfuckers
And you never seen us talking shit before now
You peeling potatoes while we sonic alligators
Making records selling like we smoking crack now
- Hot Chip (Keep Falling)

[HeyZeus]

Dude--I started a tribute to the greatness and sublime creativity of language in urban/hip-hop/rap music a while back, and no one came. That thread had two tentative posts of acknowledgement, and it was gone. "Either they don't know, don't show, or don't care 'bout what's goin' on inna hood."

I don't give a crap if it's just you and me contributing to this thread....we will hit 100 posts as long as you don't give up on it.

I see she wearin' dem jeans dat show her but crack
my girls can't wear dat
why? dat's where my stash at

Li'l Wayne, Fireman

[Cygnus]

Sorry, I can't relate. I value humility in myself and others.

[HeyZeus]

Sorry, I can't relate. I value humility in myself and others.

that wholly unnecessary comment got us 1 closer to 100!

[Doppelbock]

Sorry, I can't relate. I value humility in myself and others.

Word up.

[Brittle]

Meh... I tend to find that anyone who needs to sell it so hard is really compensating for tragically under-developed self-esteem.

When you're that good, you don't need to tell the world. The world will tell you.

[Nemesis]

Sorry, I can't relate. I value humility in myself and others.

HAHAHAHAHA I would like to submit this quote as my entry.:p

I am sorry if we don't measure up to your standards oh great one, may your merciful guiding light lead us to enlightenment. I had NO idea Jesus was an INTJ!





Nemesis added to this post, 6 minutes and 24 seconds later...

Just messing around Cygnus. I don't think you meant for that to come across like it did.

[Shorgenfunkel]

"Far Beyond Metal" by Strapping Young Lad is braggadocio at its purest.

COME ON
King Raul beat all
Fucking strength
King Raul beat all
Fucking strength

Now that the music industry's ill
And we're the fucking antidote
One line and you're outta control
Yeah, you fucking suck!

HEY!
King Raul beat off
Fucking strength
King Raul beat off
Fucking strength

Oh, you ironic pop-rock fuck
Don't you fuck with METAL
One line and you're outta control
Yeah, we fucking OWN YOU!

King Raul beat off
Fucking strength
King Raul beat off
Fucking right

Can't wait to feel it again
And I need to feel, whoa
When I was somebody else
When I was just a boy

METAL!
(come on)

[Solo / harmonized lead]

[Dev:]
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE MAGGOT MASTER!

[Oderus:]
Now in the halls of the necro lord
Flash of fear when he sees my sword
Raped his woman, smoked his bone
Leave a booger underneath his throne!

King Raul beat off
Fucking wank
King Raul beat off
Fucking...
FUCKING WANK!

So... I...

Can't wait to feel it again
And I need to feel, whoa
When I was somebody else
When I was just a boy

METAL!

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[Trenchant1]

You want to take this thread beyond 100 posts? Is that to compensate for having a small penis or something? I'm trying to think of another reason but I can't.
Hip hop/rap is a load of crap (shit, that rhymed!) as far as I'm concerned. All the bragging stuff is pathetic. 'I'm tough cos I gotta gun an' I sell drugs and I got ho's hanging round my neck'. What a load of utter fucking mindless shitarse bastard cocksucking crap. Extolling the virtues of drugs, prostitution and guns is not good. It's not even funny, despite the fact that the various 'singers' wear ridiculous clothes and jewellery that make them look like idiots. But, you know, live and let live.

[HeyZeus]

You want to take this thread beyond 100 posts? Is that to compensate for having a small penis or something? I'm trying to think of another reason but I can't.
Hip hop/rap is a load of crap (shit, that rhymed!) as far as I'm concerned. All the bragging stuff is pathetic. 'I'm tough cos I gotta gun an' I sell drugs and I got ho's hanging round my neck'. What a load of utter fucking mindless shitarse bastard cocksucking crap. Extolling the virtues of drugs, prostitution and guns is not good. It's not even funny, despite the fact that the various 'singers' wear ridiculous clothes and jewellery that make them look like idiots. But, you know, live and let live.

totally unnecessary, uncreative, and uninteresting. but it's another toward 100. got it...you have concluded based on what you've listened to that it's all useless crap. cannot reflect a social reality you know nothing about, etc. so far, you win the closed mind award, but the thread is young, an infant. the penis reference, also totally uncreative and uninteresting. check back often...

[Samoan Corleone]

How could you forget the king of braggadocio?

"Your worst fear confirmed
Me and my fam roll tight like the firm
Gettin' down for life, that's right, you better learn
Why play with fire? Burn
We get together like a choir, to acquire what we desire
We do dirt like worms,
Produce Gs like sperm
'Till legs spread like germs
I got extensive hoes,
With expensive clothes,
And sip fine wine to spit vintage flow
What, y'all don't know?"

Can't Knock The Hustle, by Jay-Z

[Nemesis]

You want to take this thread beyond 100 posts? Is that to compensate for having a small penis or something? I'm trying to think of another reason but I can't.
Hip hop/rap is a load of crap (shit, that rhymed!) as far as I'm concerned. All the bragging stuff is pathetic. 'I'm tough cos I gotta gun an' I sell drugs and I got ho's hanging round my neck'. What a load of utter fucking mindless shitarse bastard cocksucking crap. Extolling the virtues of drugs, prostitution and guns is not good. It's not even funny, despite the fact that the various 'singers' wear ridiculous clothes and jewellery that make them look like idiots. But, you know, live and let live.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA struck a nerve with this guy. I especially like the "mindless shitarse bastard cocksucking crap" part. A+ for you buddy! Sorry Trenchant, but I think you took this thread a little too seriously. Plus, name one kind of music that doesn't "extoll the virtues of drugs, prostitution, and guns" in some way. Poor guy, did you get peed on by R.Kelly when you were younger?

[Trenchant1]

Who's R.Kelly?
I just happen to think that c-rap music is poisonous. In the UK, many young, impressionable black boys listen to it, they speak like the crap 'artistes' (which makes me feel sick), they think that this 'braggadocio' is real life, they carry knives and guns, they kill other people (and each other) without a thought and without remorse, they are taken in by all the bling but they can't afford it so they go out and steal, they believe that all women are whores and should be treated as something less than human. Yes, I take it seriously. I don't know where you guys come from, where you grew up and who you have mixed with in your life. Perhaps you have never met anyone who has taken these crap people as role models. It is frightening.

[navelgazer]

Pass me the mic, cause I wants to blitz
I'm the best thing that came since grits
The prince of rap, lookin for cinderella
If you see her.. why don't you tell her
I got the shoe, in the car out back
And if she makes the fit, she's in, like, that
And as a matter of fact
I'm not an actor, but the main factor
Pinpoint and his rhymes is like a protractor
I'm intricated, complicated
Definitely musically related
Rhymes so fly never been outdated
Gots to be fly by the way I state it
Now of myself, I say I'm a big fan
Got more rhymes, than words by the letterman
Positive k, you can say he's low key
You might know my name but now look you don't know me
I can be nice and flip like the son of sam
Nobody knows exactly how I am
I'm the next and everybody knows it
Open tours this year, next year i'ma close it
I've got the skills that pays the bills, now
Here's a quote from stephanie mills
Don't put a rush on me cause my tempo's slow
And if I don't tell you, then how would you know?

positive k from Grand Puba, Positive and L.G.

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[uncon]

What is the greatest rap album? Ironically it's Paul's Boutique (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.'s_Boutique) by the Beastie Boys. The greatest rap album is by 3 Jews. How can this be so?

One of the reasons is that the Beastie Boys are aware of their braggadocio and its ridiculousness. It's a self-referential joke and a sign of high intelligence. Most rap is not self-aware. They actually believe what they're saying and that is narcissism borne out of a terribly deprived childhood. It's actually sad when you really consider it - they have a front b/c of deprivation and low self-esteem. That kinda takes the fun out of it for me.

Old School rap had a melody - it wasn't just aggression and grunting. Most hip hop and rap nowadays is the equivalent of death metal - you know, the kind with the cookie monster vocals. It's testosterone and fear only and that makes for a very unsatisfying "art". Braggadocio alone can't sustain any art form.

Paul's Boutique is like ear candy but before corn syrup took over as a sweetener - it contains actual cane sugar. It will always satisfy.

Most people will say that they like all music except for country and rap - but we all know they're not including Patsy Cline or Willie Nelson and every rap song ever made. Well all know what they mean - there's a qualitative difference.

[Trenchant1]

Great reply, uncon. I'm not against rap/hip-hop per se. I just don't like the bad end of it. I like it when people take the piss out of rap.
It's All About The Pentiums
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White and Nerdy
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[Shorgenfunkel]

Old School rap had a melody - it wasn't just aggression and grunting. Most hip hop and rap nowadays is the equivalent of death metal - you know, the kind with the cookie monster vocals. It's testosterone and fear only and that makes for a very unsatisfying "art". Braggadocio alone can't sustain any art form.

If the death metal you heard doesn't have melody, you're listening to the wrong death metal.

[Trenchant1]

Another great song. Parody of Eminem.
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What am I doing? This is moving to 100 very quickly.

[navelgazer]

Paul's Boutique is candy to my ears too. I sometimes find Weird Al funny as well.
Have you peeped Tom Green owning Xzibit? Fun

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That being said, I was hoping that this would not just be about rap music. I'll have to dig up that Mark Twain braggadocio I was thinking about.

[HeyZeus]

Another great song. Parody of Eminem.
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What am I doing? This is moving to 100 very quickly.

welcome aboard brother. I've got some Biggie coming when I get the time...

[Samoan Corleone]

welcome aboard brother. I've got some Biggie coming when I get the time...

The What (although I must admit I thought Method Man was better). I can't find it on youtube, they must've taken it down. :irked:

[HeyZeus]

I'm ready get this paper, G...ya wit' me?
Mutha f****n' right...my pockets lookin' kinda tight
And I'm stressed...yo Biggie let me get the vest
No need for that--just grab the f****n' gat
The first pocket that's fat--and take this to his back
Or his [?]--I'm a smoke him--don't fake no moves. What?
Treat it like boxing--stick and move...stick and move
N***a, you ain't got ta explain shit
I been robbin' mutha f****rs since the slave ships.

Gimme the loot
The Notorious B.I.G.
Ready to Die ('93)

It's gritty. It's a creative dialogue, possible based on a real occurrence planning a robbery. It's ugly because it demonstrates two people planning to steal at gunpoint with little consideration for the consequences of innocents. It shows a desperation and an apathy for the right of others to live without threat from random violent crime. One should not assume it's B.S. for effect. These things happen daily, but without eloquence and a beat. It's poetic in it's language.

For the guy that said Paul's Boutique is the greatest rap album of all time, that's an opinion. It's pretty obvious the Beastie Boys are being ironic. Not sure that's a sign of superior intelligence. Check the liner notes--Paul's Boutique is one of the most sample-laden albums of all time. You are diggin' on 70s funk rhythms created by others that they ripped. Check it. I like it fine, but take a closer look, and don't be afraid to challenge yourself by going to the music store, and buying something completely different, and giving it the 20 obligatory listens before you abandon it. Try to learn what THE ARTIST is saying rather than what your consciousness pre-judges his or her message to be based on some scale you dragged into the process. Merely a suggestion.

[Samoan Corleone]

For the guy that said Paul's Boutique is the greatest rap album of all time, that's an opinion.

My opinon, as well as the opinion of many critics and fans alike, is that Illmatic is the greatest rap album of all time. I quite like It Takes A Nation of Millions to Hold us Back. One day I'll have to sit down and really listen to it sequenced correctly, from the start to the end.