What is your ideal first date?

[lancelot]

With all these threads about relationships, I was curious as to what your ideal first date would be with that special someone. Normally, I like to try something I've never done before, like go to a shooting range and do some target shooting. For some reason, that always looked like fun to me, although I don't own a gun. And if I didn't like the guy, I could always pop a cap in him (just kidding) ;). So what's your ideal first date?

Lol, please don't bust a cap at anyone.

First date would be talking at Starbucks.

[Prunesquallor]

Ooh, I like the study session idea.

Or, climbing trees and throwing bran cereal at people from the higher branches. Followed, perhaps, by watching Metalocalypse, The Mighty Boosh, or something else amusing. Interspersed with lots of conversation about something insane. Possibly designing imaginary religions, governments, or languages, or speculating about Spock's personal life, sushi and gerbils, or suchlike.

Museums are ok too, though. So long as they're not too quiet and echoey so that our mockery would annoy people. Bookstores are also good places to go. Making fun of the self-help and romance sections is always a good time.

[alphawolf]

Good food.

Good wine.

Good sex.

Good night.

Good sex.

Good night again.

Good sex.

Good night again.

Good morning.

Good sex.

Good coffee.

Good, long nap.

[Mozzes]

speculating about Spock's personal life

My friends and I had a discussion once about whether Spock was a boxers or briefs kind of guy. We eventually settled on briefs except for one dissenter who insisted Spock was a free baller because underwear was a human invention.

[Nikita]

I think an awesome first date would be going skydiving. I'd like to see how the guy handles himself. An amusement park with great roller coasters would also be a lot of fun.

[cereza]

A great first date for me is to go somewhere where the atmosphere is easygoing or playful. Concerts are great for first dates, coffee shops, bookstores, art museums, to a football or basketball game.. anywhere that`ll provide stimulation and conversation.

[Plane Stress]

Dude I love the shooting range idea! I'd be way to shy to show myself there without a push, but wow that would be ideal. Show off some of my childish playfulness and awesomeness. I once thought about taking a girl to an airport spectator area to look at airplanes for a date, but we broke up before I could ask her. Looking back, I don't think she would have been all that impressed haha. I also think a museum would be good. Or maybe a track day somewhere. The possibilities are endless... *sigh*.

[Jinxu]

What is your ideal first date?

Dinner at my apartment and dessert inside my bedroom. ;D

[Polymath]

I guess just going to one of those student classical music recitals downtown would be ideal. Not too much talking, just a bit before and after.

[llBradll]

I'd like to get to know somebody well on my first date so maybe coffee or something like that. Ideally I'd like to know somebody fairly well before the first date though.
The shooting range idea sounds pretty awesome too.

[WaeV]

Skiing would ahve been nice. :/

[MaleVolentworld]

Talking?? *shudder shudder* Get lost, let's go bowling, or paintball, or cinema, or biking or hiking or something weird.

[Acextreme]

Lunch, then movies, then dinner. With some other extras like shopping, coffee, etc. Basically activities where we can relax and just enjoy the date. I particularly like movies because that's like a 2hrs break from conversation but yet still being close together; helps me to relax...

[une fille]

I liked Dalidaisy's one that she's been posting about.
Talking for a while, then going to a foreign country to meet the person.. It's just neat.



But, I guess if you live in the U.S., you better break out the Blockbuster card and not even consider making me eat in front of you.

[JTG1984]

I think an awesome first date would be going skydiving. I'd like to see how the guy handles himself. An amusement park with great roller coasters would also be a lot of fun.

High maintenance are we?
I think realistically a coffee shop would probally be ideal.

[raharu]

Either something with "action" or which provides us something to talk about. I'm not so fond of the movies, a concert or anything else where you're sitting still next to each other, but would be in bad taste to talk to one another.

I like the paintball idea. And coffee/bookshops. One girl I dated, our first date was dressing up as pirates and going to the local playground entertaining kids and telling them that we were lost time-travelers. But then one of the kids grabbed my copy of American Psycho out of my back pocket and was convinced that it was our "script." Goodness, I hope that wasn't our script! xD

But that's just INFPs for ya! :p

[Doki]

One girl I dated, our first date was dressing up as pirates and going to the local playground entertaining kids and telling them that we were lost time-travelers. But then one of the kids grabbed my copy of American Psycho out of my back pocket and was convinced that it was our "script." Goodness, I hope that wasn't our script!

I must do this before I die. *adds to the list*

[boldbidder]

Cuddle on the couch while watching some South Park, Boondocks, or the Rachel Maddow Show.

[SimplyOtter]

Skiing would ahve been nice. :/


ATo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Seriously, with this post you broke my heart! I really feel for you.
Hey, you will have other chances, and better ones. Chin up and start anew.

:)

[SeaCzar]

One of my best first dates (unfortunately, the relationship did not last, imagine that) was taking her to the National Arboretum in Washington DC with a picnic lunch.

[Thinker]

One of my best first dates (unfortunately, the relationship did not last, imagine that) was taking her to the National Arboretum in Washington DC with a picnic lunch.

I can relate to this.

My best first date was with a Canadian lady visiting Australia. I took her up into the mountains to one of my favourite spots where there are some warm springs that you can swim in. It is quite remote with no-one around. It was a great day. The relationship didn't last...but I still think of her.

Yeah...I know, as if she hasn't seen enough mountains coming from Canada.
Well...she enjoyed it...OK!

[Hjordis]

I'm another weird one that wouldn't like to do something traditional like the movies. It just doesn't appeal to me. I love the paintball and shooting range ideas. I'd also like to go to an amusement park or maybe an arcade.

[Storm]

First date is somewhere super casual where you can leave if it goes sour, or stay if it's great. Coffee shop kind of a place.

The really fun stuff (amusement parks, kayaking, arcade halls, picnics in the park etc.), are more for 2nd or 3rd dates.

[ScurvyRose]

One that never ends!

[Hjordis]

First date is somewhere super casual where you can leave if it goes sour, or stay if it's great. Coffee shop kind of a place.

The really fun stuff (amusement parks, kayaking, arcade halls, picnics in the park etc.), are more for 2nd or 3rd dates.
See, I'm probably too picky for my own good, so I'd already be nearly certain that it wouldn't go bad.

[Brittle]

I think a picnic (late lunch) somewhere you could walk and look at the scenery would be great, and if things were going well you could have the option of dinner later on.

[Thinker]

One that never ends!

That does it for me!

[Storm]

See, I'm probably too picky for my own good, so I'd already be nearly certain that it wouldn't go bad.

True, I'm that way too. But I still like an exit plan.

[intjdude]

The ideal first date is one where she picks up the whole tab.

[Jinxu]

The ideal first date is one where she picks up the whole tab.

Never gonna happen if you expect to get a second date.

[intjdude]

Never gonna happen if you expect to get a second date.

That's just sexist.

[alphawolf]

Never gonna happen if you expect to get a second date.

It can definitely happen if all she wants is sex and you are good enough.

Some women just do not want to feel like they owe anything to a man that would take away from their independence - they just want sex.

[pure potential]

One girl I dated, our first date was dressing up as pirates and going to the local playground entertaining kids and telling them that we were lost time-travelers.

Awwesome!


Some women just do not want to feel like they owe anything to a man that would take away from their independence - they just want sex.

True. I'm recovering from this one. Now I'm focused on being interdependent and getting great sex. ;)

As far as an ideal first date: playing golf, romping around a mountain or any outdoors sport/activity followed by a wonderful meal and great vino sounds good to me.

[Feral]

.... date?

Hmmm... I suppose if someone can get me out of my house, it's probably a good date...?
... but I like sitting in and watching a movie or playing video games, too.

I'm not very good at the dating thing.

[Jinxu]

.... date?

Hmmm... I suppose if someone can get me out of my house, it's probably a good date...?
... but I like sitting in and watching a movie or playing video games, too.

I'm not very good at the dating thing.

Dear Feral

Will you go out with me?

Love,

Jinxu

[Feral]

Dear Feral

Will you go out with me?

Love,

Jinxu

Out where?

[Rho1334]

for me a nice dinner is suffient...i generally dont date much but when i find someone I generally don't care where we are just that we are together.

[ricearoni]

For some reason, I really don't like first dates at coffee shops even though I love going to them for later dates. If it's a first date, I always end up asking the guy if we can leave the place and walk around. Conversation seems to flow better when I don't have to face a person the entire evening and worry about if I'm drinking/eating gracefully.

[Jinxu]

Out where?

How about this idea? My place or your place doesn't really matter as long as the end result is the same. :curtain:

Dinner at my apartment and dessert inside my bedroom. ;D

[El Ganso]

The ideal first date is one where she picks up the whole tab.

Amen. In fact, I think women should start asking guys out more. Let's ditch those relics of the 20th century.

(Disclaimer: Above statements not to be construed as an actual reluctance to pick up the tab on a date or an actual expectation to not have to ask her out first. Let's get real here).

[Undead Bonzi]

We start the night dining on greasy fast food under the romantic glare of a banks of fluorescent lights which make us both look slightly sickly. We murmur sweet nothings to each other with onion scented breath as we gaze into each others eyes and listen to the sound of our arteries hardening. Suddenly pirates leap out of the shadows and attack! My date rips off her cloths revealing a skin tight leather ninja outfit as she swings into action. Once all the pirates are dead her evil twin sister shows up and suggests a threesome....sweet.

Yeah, my real ideal first date...being able to keep my bullshit and sarcasm to a minimum.

[llBradll]

How about this idea? My place or your place doesn't really matter as long as the end result is the same. :curtain:

You sound like the romantic type.

[Jinxu]

You sound like the romantic type.

It's called 'making love' for a reason...

[Winterstorm]

Journey around the world :D

[kc28329]

dinner while sharing an intelligent conversation or something nerdy- going to guest lectures, playing a board game, visiting a museum, etc

[rain]

Good food.

Good wine.

Good sex.

Good night.

Good sex.

Good night again.

Good sex.

Good night again.

Good morning.

Good sex.

Good coffee.

Good, long nap.

alpha darling, the question was an ideal first date, not your experience with your first girlfriend ;)

For some reason, I really don't like first dates at coffee shops even though I love going to them for later dates. If it's a first date, I always end up asking the guy if we can leave the place and walk around. Conversation seems to flow better when I don't have to face a person the entire evening and worry about if I'm drinking/eating gracefully.

I agree, I hate coffee shops for first dates. I like tea shops. I also would much rather prefer early drinks before dinner, either that or Sat brunch, being that my Sundays are always filled up.

[alphawolf]

alpha darling, the question was an ideal first date, not your experience with your first girlfriend ;)

Rain dear, my first girlfriend didn't drink wine or coffee...

Those two have become prerequisites nowadays.

[eternaltriangle]

It is late Spring - warm enough to be pleasant outside, but not stiflingly hot. We have a picnic, with cheese and a nice cool rose (the e should have an accent on it, but I don't know how to add it - I mean the wine). We play scrabble, chess or trivial pursuit - it absorbs the awkward moments. It gets late, dark. "Want to see a movie at my place?" One of us asks the other. A film is selected - if I select a film, it is a Soviet avant-garde film, a David Lynch movie or Tetsuo (most people cannot watch more than 5 minutes of Tetsuo) and they like it. If they select the film it is an interesting probably "indy" (I don't like the label "indy", since many of my favourite films had decent enough budgets in the 60's and 70's, but back then directors had more leeway) film I would not otherwise pick.

The movie ends. We hug each other good night. I kiss them lightly on the cheek. They hold me tighter and push me up against the wall. We succumb to our mutual desires. Contented, I sleep well. I wake up next to them, both of us with morning breath and messy hair. It feels right.

[smashy]

A nice day at the beach. You can talk, you can have fun, you can check each other's body (eheheheheh) and it's romantic and easy going at the same time, no pressures.

[Solus]

It can definitely happen if all she wants is sex and you are good enough.

Some women just do not want to feel like they owe anything to a man that would take away from their independence - they just want sex.

You INFJs never cease to amaze me. Find me a robot INTJ who would associate this emancipated nymphomaniac with an "ideal first date". ;)

We have a picnic, with cheese and a nice cool rose (the e should have an accent on it, but I don't know how to add it - I mean the wine).

So it's rosé but why cheese? For me that would be a no-no. Unless brushing teeth was interjected at some point prior to kissing.

They hold me tighter and push me up against the wall.

I must admit I love this masochistic bit. I just wish I had the body that would inspire potential partners to let me push them into submission.

A nice day at the beach.
Somewhere by the sea would just be fantastic. I would fantasize about the sort of setting as shown in the video for Black's Wonderful life. To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

[qwerty123]

It is about 7:30 pm. We see each other for the first time in a small boutique wine shop. The floors are reclaimed wood, bottles are on built in wooden racks, and an old-library style ladder on brass runners allows access to the top shelf.

Neither anticipated meeting a prospective partner, nor had relationships on their mind. Both parties are single.

The girl asks what I think about a wine she is holding and I confess that I'm just learning and I'm not really sure. I say something about the broader region signaling some knowledge but not detailed specifics. She admits that the question was very specific and that she also is just getting into wine.

We start talking.

It is obvious that both parties are interested, and I hint that I have not eaten. She says something about being hungry, but that we've just met. I buy the bottle of wine in question and we go to a small mid-range restaurant where I know the owner. He waives the corking fee and we have the wine for dinner. Having clearly hit it off I ask for her number at the end of the meal which she offers. We part ways and I call her midweek to see if she is free/interested in doing anything over the coming weekend.

She likely has a somewhat dark personality although is certainty capable of letting go and having a good time. Somber aspects are not from a past of abuse or failure, but from a higher level of thought than most put into life. She has had bouts of cynicism. She is stimulated predominantly through winding although specific conversation. Her beauty would not be labeled as "conventional," although she is short, thin and attractive.

[2obvious]

(I could never build up the gall to plan this, but...)

A trip to one of those places where you make and glaze and fire your own pottery?

Followed by a trip to an outdoor gun range that allows us to use our pottery for target practice.

And maybe a small, strawberry malt. (I like those.)

[eternaltriangle]

"I must admit I love this masochistic bit. I just wish I had the body that would inspire potential partners to let me push them into submission."

I am a guy, so obviously that doesn't happen very much. And nothing is worse than somebody being sadistic because they know what I want. I want them to do it because they want to - selfishness is a big turn-on for me.

And wine should go with cheese - as sharp a cheese as I can find. I think minty fresh clean breath is overrated (but again, I am weird... for instance I find it interesting that different smokers taste different when you kiss them, pending on their brand. Since I remember taste and smell more clearly than other things, I tend to remember smokers more than non-smokers).

PS: I do not smoke for the record.

[rain]

Rain dear, my first girlfriend didn't drink wine or coffee...

Those two have become prerequisites nowadays.

alpha darling, then do you provide the good food, the good sex and the good nap?

[alphawolf]

alpha darling, then do you provide the good food, the good sex and the good nap?

rain dear, you know it takes two to tango! food so fine, a bottle of wine, forty winks with a girl sublime... you make me wanna shoop (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)!

[Solus]

I am a guy, so obviously that doesn't happen very much. And nothing is worse than somebody being sadistic because they know what I want. I want them to do it because they want to - selfishness is a big turn-on for me.

I find the whole subject of unequal relations of power in a relationship fascinating. In theory at least. Fassbinder's Die bitteren Tränen der Petra von Kant springs to one's mind.

And wine should go with cheese - as sharp a cheese as I can find. I think minty fresh clean breath is overrated (but again, I am weird... for instance I find it interesting that different smokers taste different when you kiss them, pending on their brand. Since I remember taste and smell more clearly than other things, I tend to remember smokers more than non-smokers).

PS: I do not smoke for the record.

I don't know what rosé goes with, but anything past Camembert or Mozzarella would not be acceptable. Of course, if you want to show off, Mozzarella is not the way to go. Especially if you're into fishnet and latex. If so, serving timid Mozzarella will certainly confuse your potential partner.

As far as anything more pungent is concerned, a slice of brie and the first ideal date is certainly not ideal anymore and may not be a date anymore. Never smoked and hope they won't either.

I don't believe that I'm actually thinking and writing about this at work.

[Alcestis]

I am a guy, so obviously that doesn't happen very much.That sounds horribly frustrating. Sounds like your perfect date is someone who already knows this and you'd never have to broach the subject in the first place.

As for a first date... I like to think I have a pliant enough personality and genuine enjoyment/curiosity of whatever situation I'm in to give the other person free reign in choosing where to go. He'll be happy, I'll be engaged, win. Well, unless he chooses a movie date. One's attention is on the movie and not the other person, which seems counterproductive for "getting to know you". Even snuggling on some beaten up couch watching anything that long... it seems quite tedious and a cop-out date for anyone who is awkward at filling time with anything less than sparkling conversation.

[yepunsarang]

I guess just going to one of those student classical music recitals downtown would be ideal. Not too much talking, just a bit before and after.

Definitely!!! That is, if I could find a date who loves classical music! ;)

[MrDoom]

A day at the library, nerding out and sharing each other's reading habits.

[rain]

rain dear, you know it takes two to tango! food so fine, a bottle of wine, forty winks with a girl sublime... you make me wanna shoop (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)!

Alphadarling, let's say you went out on this ideal date...what sort of wine would you choose? :lips:

[alphawolf]

Alphadarling, let's say you went out on this ideal date...what sort of wine would you choose? :lips:

How about some Amarone, Rain dear?


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[theDoc]

I'm feeling frisky at the moment so I'd go with in her bed.

[ElstonGunn]

How about some Amarone, Rain dear?[/IMG]

Interesting. I would have suggested a Franzia. Or if you really want to class things up, maybe a Cisco.


I don't have much of an opinion about what I'd want to do on a first date. I could probably suggest a few things that I wouldn't like, though. Like if someone put too much thought into any date (especially the first one). That would irk me to no end.

[Valielen]

My last first date started with a cup of tea in my house, followed by hours of endless chatting, some playful teaching of new martial arts moves to each other, followed by a kiss, sleep, waking up, walking to the martial arts shop where I got a bokken as a present, a massive baguette for lunch (beef melt... yum), ending at his place and not leaving his room till the next day. It was great!

To make it absolutely perfect, should have had a walk on the beach in the middle of all that. No beaches where we were though, so near enough.

[dalidaisy]

I think an awesome first date would be going skydiving. I'd like to see how the guy handles himself. An amusement park with great roller coasters would also be a lot of fun.

Sorry I'm late. I've been busy dating!

Amusement parks are fun for dates. There is excitement, adventure & plenty of time to talk while walking between attractions. You don't have to feel uncomfortable sitting face to face with someone watching you for hours & you find out how a person reacts to different stimuli.

[rain]

How about some Amarone, Rain dear?


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that would be nice alphawolfdarling, with some chocolate. :)


Interesting. I would have suggested a Franzia. Or if you really want to class things up, maybe a Cisco.

Those are good choices, although I'm not really into the fruity wines and I don't really care for dessert wines. Since I'm from California, I tend to be biased and like California wines, especially from Rutherford valley. I also like wine that's been aged in French barrels as opposed to American oak, but it's a rather subtle preference. One thing about dessert wines (except for the whites) that I don't like is that they have too many tannens and it sits a bit heavy with me, whereas if I have a good glass of classic cabernet, although it's medium-bodied, it feels light and refreshing.


I don't have much of an opinion about what I'd want to do on a first date. I could probably suggest a few things that I wouldn't like, though. Like if someone put too much thought into any date (especially the first one). That would irk me to no end.

Really? I think if a guy puts a lot of thought into just our first date, then I'll typically think he was a keeper.

[alphawolf]

that would be nice alphawolfdarling, with some chocolate. :)

Hah! She likes my Italian wine ;) And it's even fruity and heavy! Who could turn down a good Amarone? Honestly?


Those are good choices, although I'm not really into the fruity wines and I don't really care for dessert wines. Since I'm from California, I tend to be biased and like California wines, especially from Rutherford valley. I also like wine that's been aged in French barrels as opposed to American oak, but it's a rather subtle preference. One thing about dessert wines (except for the whites) that I don't like is that they have too many tannens and it sits a bit heavy with me, whereas if I have a good glass of classic cabernet, although it's medium-bodied, it feels light and refreshing.

I like a woman who likes wine. Especially the ones I suggest ;)



Really? I think if a guy puts a lot of thought into just our first date, then I'll typically think he was a keeper.

I'm workin' on it, Rain dear, one drop at a time. What kind of chocolate do you like?

[QuoteRadar]

One girl I dated, our first date was dressing up as pirates and going to the local playground entertaining kids and telling them that we were lost time-travelers.

If I could find someone who would do that with me, I think our first date would be the wedding chapel!

Or, you know, people watching/mocking is always a good time...

Coffee shops are pretty safe, but safe can be sort of boring. If you're going to go that route, I'd say bring a board game or something just to shake things up and strike up conversation.

ALMOST FORGOT! Swing dancing! A guy who can swing or is at least willing to learn is definitely worth a chance.

[Baccara]

Hard to say. As I've mentioned before, I'm not really into the "dating" scenario; the social setup seems artificial and makes me self-conscious. I think it would be more along the lines of "ideal outing with a special friend" for me. In such case, though, it doesn't matter too much what the place/event is. Preferably it would be someplace beautiful and/or original, and alone with the other person, as opposed to among a crowd. I'd want to savor the experience getting closer to someone I already know, rather than casually just trying to gather information about them in a more typical fashion.

[QuietDragon]

I was curious as to what your ideal first date would be.

Some of us don't manage first dates, although we do occasionally manage first hopeless acts of desperation.

:(

[ADullEssence]

Not so much the ideal date, but rather the perfect date for me:

By day, one of the following:
-Basically talking all day while doing something passive but interesting enough to bring conversation. Being public transport junkies for a day or something of the sort.
-Major thrill seeking, amusement parks, bungy jumping, skydiving etc.

By night, dinner and a movie. Followed by conversation + drugs + sex.
Morning of recovery sleeping in and taking a long shower.

[wittykitty]

Somewhere remote, dark, and preferably with a poor cell signal.

[bil]

Shoot, I'd be happy just to be able to afford a first date right now.

Which brings up the questions, ladies or gents of knowledge of such: What would be a great first date that doesn't cost a bushel of bills and yet impresses and pleasures both parties?

[wittykitty]

Shoot, I'd be happy just to be able to afford a first date right now.

Which brings up the questions, ladies or gents of knowledge of such: What would be a great first date that doesn't cost a bushel of bills and yet impresses and pleasures both parties?

A picnic.

[rahdam]

A picnic.

Story time! I used to drink, from time to time, with friends. We were at a friend's place downing screwdrivers, and the group was coed; I knew some of the people, I did not know some of the people. Anyway, I had a bit too much to drink, and one of the ladies there caught my eye. I don't remember how it happened, but I scored a date somehow. I think she asked me out, but again, details are sketch (for obvious reasons). So it turns out it's a picnic.

Well, a few days later I go over to her place to pick her up with all the fixings for the picnic she prepared. Now, I was sober. And DAMMMNNN was she NOT attractive! Short story short, I made that the shortest picnic EVER! So I take her back to her place, and she asks if I'm coming in, and gives me a naughty wink. "NOPE! I got...errands...errr...somethin...BYE!"

[Cincinnatus]

There are a few good ones mentioned previously, but what would also hit it off would be going to a music venue featuring a band in which we both hold in high regard. She gets bonus points for rockin' a band tee AND having it be a band I like. In a similar way, my friend says, "if she's wearing a Melvins shirt, I know it was meant to be." I would frown a bit, if she felt compelled to wear the overplayed, nice girl, fuzzy sweater. I want to know the you a year from now, not the "best-foot-forward" you.

Also, I enjoy random, off the cuff things like taking an impromptu walk through a cemetery, rather than the cliché dinner and a movie date.

[themuzicman]

Story time! I used to drink, from time to time, with friends. We were at a friend's place downing screwdrivers, and the group was coed; I knew some of the people, I did not know some of the people. Anyway, I had a bit too much to drink, and one of the ladies there caught my eye. I don't remember how it happened, but I scored a date somehow. I think she asked me out, but again, details are sketch (for obvious reasons). So it turns out it's a picnic.

Well, a few days later I go over to her place to pick her up with all the fixings for the picnic she prepared. Now, I was sober. And DAMMMNNN was she NOT attractive! Short story short, I made that the shortest picnic EVER! So I take her back to her place, and she asks if I'm coming in, and gives me a naughty wink. "NOPE! I got...errands...errr...somethin...BYE!"

Good thing you only got a date, and not something you didn't bargain for the first night!





themuzicman added to this post, 2 minutes and 42 seconds later...

First date?

Dinner. Probably not all that formal. Pizza hut. Sports bar, if she's into sports. Then something fun but leisurely; putt putt golf or a walk in the park... Again, depends on her.

Completely different tack: If she's a golfer, we go golf 9 holes, and then do lunch/dinner.

[MikeAZ]

Book store with a coffee shop.

[cindybear]

Shoot, I'd be happy just to be able to afford a first date right now.

Which brings up the questions, ladies or gents of knowledge of such: What would be a great first date that doesn't cost a bushel of bills and yet impresses and pleasures both parties?

My favorite dates are low/no-cost:

-Spreading a blanket at a park and talking. With snacks.

-Riding bikes. Along the beach or exploring new neighborhoods

-A long hike

-Listening to gospel music at a church and walking through some neighborhoods afterward (you don't have to be religious or be church member...just enjoy the music. You might be able to philosophize on the walk about the sermon, about life, or whatever.)

-Break out a laptop together, find a recipe together, go to the grocery store together, bake or cook together.

-Go to the bookstore, pick a book, take turns reading to each other.

-Go to a music store, give each other tracks to listen to.

[rickster]

I prefer a good fuck for a first date.

It usually gets me thinking about a second date.

[curiousjane]

An ideal first date is one that doesn't feel like a date at all. Not that those exist.

The most successful first date for me was the one in which I met my (now) boyfriend for coffee on a Saturday morning. We chatted (I was shy), played Scrabble (he won), and the coffee turned into lunch, and lunch turned into an art museum , and the museum turned into a good-bye hug and a "catch you online, sometime?" and THAT turned into him haunting online and getting a false start with each of my roommates, who borrowed my laptop over the weekend (my Yahoo Messenger was set to load automatically). He thought both of them were me, on different days, and they both quickly corrected him. Finally, the next day I took pity on him and hung out online, intentionally waiting to see if he'd try and log in a third time. He did, and he asked if we could go on another date. So we did ...

... and the rest, as they say, is history.

Supposedly, it's those "never-ending dates" like the one we had that turn into relationships. You just feel like you could spend more and more time together, so you do, without even batting an eyelash. Worked for me. :thumbsup:

[Solaris]

I don't know that I have an ideal down to the last detail. I just want to be able to talk to the guy (which means we need to be able to hear ourselves). If it goes well, having a comfortable place to sit is nice too. I agree with CJ, the less it feels like a date, the better.

[Kalle]

m y first date i was i n Sherbrooke and i meet a girl from m y school. we went to Tim Hortons for latte and talk abaout music and sports. she like hockey.

[Xanthippe]

The ideal changes depending on the people involved, but I've had a couple cute ones:

- Getting caught in a thunderstorm with a large group of people, splitting off from everyone, and watching the rain from a little coffee shop
- Dinner, then going to a party and making fun of the drunk people
- Hide-and-go-seek in the dark, with partners (it was really just a party, but it turned into a fun and exciting date)

[twinkleyes]

star gazing, all the better if you live or can get outside the city limits

[Elfrun]

Please, no movie theatres, movie on a couch is ok-ish if I already know the guy but going out to see one is boooooring and please no bowling or other games where you have to wear clown shoes and get competitive through sports, an intellectual battle of wits is great but not competitive sports, that's not romantic.

First date is somewhere super casual where you can leave if it goes sour, or stay if it's great. Coffee shop kind of a place.

The really fun stuff (amusement parks, kayaking, arcade halls, picnics in the park etc.), are more for 2nd or 3rd dates.

Indeed! Need an easy out. I love fun, active stuff but not for a first date.

I do like the idea of walking around though, that way there's something to fill silences with and take away any awkwardness.

Recon my ideal would be meeting on a Saturday at about 11am and wandering around street markets or something similar, if the conversation is a smash then Saturday morning can be dragged out to Saturday afternoon or even evening and eating, drinking and sitting down can be included but if we don't click then we wander around for a bit then say ta-taa and it's all done and dusted.

Plus that way I'd get to see how they interact with other people and therefore learn more about them, actions tell me more than words.

Definately no alcohol straight away, I like me a shy boy so I don't want someone drinking a bottle of courage and getting pissed on me before I've figured him out some.

[PillowSoup]

This. My post in another discussion board.

On Wednesday, we had out final exam. She stayed up studying until the morning and slept through the exam.
I called her as soon as I was done, she asked me to take her somewhere so I picked her up and started driving to the mall that the kids from my school go to.
Halfway there, she told me that she didn't feel like being around a lot of people and asked if she could just go hang out at my house. What ensued was possibly the best possible first date.
Of course, I obliged. It was pretty far out of the way both from the mall and from her dorm, so it took a pretty long drive to get there. For the record, John Legend is a fucking godsend.
We got to my place, got into bed and started watching a stoner movie and we just let things kinda flow from there.
Later at night, we went out to have dinner, hands all over each other. I at first intended to take her home afterwards, but she didn't seem to like that plan. There was a late-night movie showing, but that didn't sound right either.
Then rain started to piss down.
There was no way that we were going to go over to the next town to her dorm and the bars would have been too crowded because of the weather.
Instead, we went back to my place and watched yet another movie and she had her first time smoking weed. I'll have to admit, she's fucking hardcore.
We went through three or four joints and upwards of 8 bowls. I was blitzed after the first joint, but she kept wanting more. She managed to learn to hit the bong by herself too. I was truly amazed at her tolerance, but I think that's just her (the first time she drank, she downed an entire bottle of Johnny Walker).
[Del]

We fell asleep in each other's arms.
We woke up at dawn, had a small snack, and smoked more weed and just kinda spaced out with each other for hours.
We awoke in the afternoon, went downtown and had some lunch, and sat in traffic for two hours the way back to my place.
I had to make my way to my parents' house though, so she had to take the train and a cab home.
I swear though, word gets around in this town fast.
My ex's friends saw us walking in one of the malls and stopped to chat with us, then she called to joke around. My best friend knew something was up because he called me the night before and I was with her and the evening afterwards I was still with her.He and his girlfriend then called me for an hour and grilled me about her.
I now believe that everyone I fucking know will know about this by tomorrow morning XD. It's good though. Something is finally working in my life...
Who said that two INTJs don't go together?

[escapist11]

Coffee and chat, then a walk and talk with no particular destination in mind.
( :

[icelandicriot]

My first dates have a few parts to them.

We go someplace that interests me (a museum, OMSI, the zoo.....) or if we're hungry to one of my favorite feeding spots about the town. If they can't keep up a conversation or can't keep up intellectually with whatever the activity is (i.e. if they bore me or I have to explain everything to them, or they just have no interest in gaining any knowledge), then after first activity they get a "nice meeting you" and i'm off to do my own thing.

If first part of date went well, then usually we go to one of the various, beautiful parks in my city and walk around talking until it's dark and the hobo's start arriving or we think of something even better to do.

Should second part go well, we shall get coffee/tea and continue fantastic conversation.

[MikeC]

the night zoo where we can check out giant eels and kiwis in their natural habitats.

[Maayan]

Coffee. I pick where.

[jesster]

Action dates sound like hell to me. Anything where there's pressure on me to prove how fun and zany and wild i am? Noo thanks.

My perfect dates are introvert-suitable ones, but with a decent amount going on around that can either be easily ignored or used as diversion.

eg Talking and sitting at a laid back bar with a pool table and interesting normal people around. Couches in a coffee shop in a interesting neighbourhood.

My all time ultimate? Walking through the city late on a warm balmy night. Strolling randomly, pausing at interesting junctions or to perch on a low wall, buying food, talking and being quietly connected in rotation.

[escapist11]

Or a fun trip to an amusement part. Roller coasters are fun!
Or an awesome concert and perhaps a late night meal, burgers and fries, afterwards.

[Samoan Corleone]

Going to the museum (it's happened twice).

[Nikonman]

An ideal first date is one that doesn't feel like a date at all. Not that those exist.

The most successful first date for me was the one in which I met my (now) boyfriend for coffee on a Saturday morning. We chatted (I was shy), played Scrabble (he won), and the coffee turned into lunch, and lunch turned into an art museum , and the museum turned into a good-bye hug and a "catch you online, sometime?" and THAT turned into him haunting online and getting a false start with each of my roommates, who borrowed my laptop over the weekend (my Yahoo Messenger was set to load automatically). He thought both of them were me, on different days, and they both quickly corrected him. Finally, the next day I took pity on him and hung out online, intentionally waiting to see if he'd try and log in a third time. He did, and he asked if we could go on another date. So we did ...

... and the rest, as they say, is history.

Supposedly, it's those "never-ending dates" like the one we had that turn into relationships. You just feel like you could spend more and more time together, so you do, without even batting an eyelash. Worked for me. :thumbsup:

Ignoring the subsequent on line false starts in curiousjane's story, I think this describes what I believe is an ideal first date, something simple like coffee that can turn into other activities if things go well. I've made the mistake a few times of going straight for the dinner out as a first date and then regretted wasting the time and money when there was no chemistry. Coffee and conversation is a great way to figure out if a second date is in order.

A close friend of mine always asserted that first dates should be treated as a first job interview - get there early, listen well, ask some questions to show your interest, be brief and get out before you screw it up. He had something like a 20 or 30 minutes rule for a first date, usually at a coffee shop. I've not followed his recommendations very well, but there have been a few times I wished I had followed them rather than setting up a longer date before knowing how well we'd mesh.

[S3raphymn]

Something low key. I like coffee and walking and visiting museums.

Or sitting and talking while watching a sunset. Cliche, low key, and a good chance to get to know someone.