How many partners have you had sex with?

[Firebrand]

And what's your age?

Ok, I'll go first. I'm in my early 30's. I've only been with 4 people total, and 1 of them I only fooled around with. Two of them I was with many many times, one over 5+ years with consistency.

For me, sex is super intense and is profoundly meaningful to me, and isn't something I can share easily. I also don't want to be with someone who's going to be gossiping about it later. I don't care for that at all. The details of my sex life are private to me and I would want to be with women who respect that.

That having been said, I would be with someone casually that I'm at least comfortable with mentally (friends). Without that, no deal. Also, in that case, I'd want it to remain a no-strings-attached sort of relationship. Many people I know, myself included, have made the mistake of convincing themselves that sex = a relationship, and this created problems upon attempt to exit.

Anyways, what about you?

[Santana28]

i'm 27.... my total? 8

lost my virginity at 17...
2nd @ 19
3rd and 4th @ 23
5th, 6th, 7th, 8th @ 27 (been a busy year...hehe ;)

[Vagrant]

I'm 19.

Total count: 1

Many many times, of course.

[ToC]

Lost at 13, total regular "insert-here" sex with a female human (just to clarify) is 7.

I have no clue in hell how many people I've "fooled around with"

I am currently 18

[Rudy]

0! I'm 24. Someone has to live up to the "Virgins" part of the forum title.

It has nothing to do with appearance, or lack of fitness; so I have been assured by the opinions of many others. I just don't have time for a serious relationship, and probably won't until I get my Ph.D. Casual sex? The idea in anathema to me.

[wendytwtee]

Lol, with you myself. I'm 18, no serious relationships in that sense so far; been exhausting my energy on making lasting friendships in high school instead and therefore no intimacy.

[alphawolf]

I really can't remember, since I don't put notches on my bedpost. I am ashamed to tell my rough estimate in public, because it really goes above the standard deviation from the norm.

No, I am not proud of it, just haven't yet found a woman worth keeping who would also want to keep me. I know things will get better soon, though.

[Harmony]

Finally... I don't feel bad responding now...

I stopped keeping track of how many... Because I really don't think it's something that matters. Like alpha, I just can't find someone that keeps me interested for long enough...

[Josephine1012]

Finally... I don't feel bad responding now...

I stopped keeping track of how many... Because I really don't think it's something that matters. Like alpha, I just can't find someone that keeps me interested for long enough...

I have to agree, where I think the number doesn't so much matter. Mine is on a relatively low side, but I think focusing on mathematics isn't the correct approach to romance. It's all about being honest with yourself and doing what's right for you.

[Kisai]

I'm in my 30's and I lost count.

[Firebrand]

Ok, but "losing count" or being embarrassed doesn't change reality. I'm trying to prove a few theories for myself, but I don't want to put them out there as it will completely derail this thread. Please add numbers, not "selective amnesia".

[Kisai]

Ok. Define 'having sex'. Are we talking about strictly penis-vagina sex?

[Rudy]

I'm afraid trying to test a theory based on thread responses is doomed to failure. Way, way too much self-selection is involved. Although I have no problem saying it, many virgins are not going to want to admit to such a thing, and likewise those who have had many, many partners are not going to want to put a number to it. Such people will often not respond at all.

[Hatsumomo1]

I'm 22. Total partners: 2.

I lost my virginity at 18, and man did it suck!

[Harmony]

Ok, but "losing count" or being embarrassed doesn't change reality. I'm trying to prove a few theories for myself, but I don't want to put them out there as it will completely derail this thread. Please add numbers, not "selective amnesia".

How will putting the theory out there derail this thread?

And for some of us I'd wager it's seriously not selective amnesia... It's literally that we stopped counting, and don't feel like wracking our brain over the years to remember all of them.

[Berzeger]

18 yrs, 1 sex partner so far. Lost my virginity at age of 17 (to be precious, exactly 362 days ago)

[Synamon]

I'm afraid trying to test a theory based on thread responses is doomed to failure. Way, way too much self-selection is involved. Although I have no problem saying it, many virgins are not going to want to admit to such a thing, and likewise those who have had many, many partners are not going to want to put a number to it. Such people will often not respond at all.
The virgins on this forum don't seem to be shy about admitting it.

I would encourage the OP to define "sex" first, are you including oral?

[Rudy]

Still, if polling on forums was a way to get data that was even slightly valid, we'd be seeing a lot more of it in scientific and sociological research.

[Santana28]

okay people, i'm with FireBrand on this one... now is not the time nor place for shame. Simple numbers will suffice - no one is judging you :) just put it out there

[intjdude]

an annonymous poll might work better here...

but for the record 2... i'm 32.. was with the same girl for the last 10 years... honestly, i like my numbers low

but mentally, i'm a slut... i've imagined doing it with literally thousands haha ;D

[Kisai]

How will putting the theory out there derail this thread?

And for some of us I'd wager it's seriously not selective amnesia... It's literally that we stopped counting, and don't feel like wracking our brain over the years to remember all of them.


Also we've been inebriated, high, at play parties, and god knows what's been done to me when I've been unconscious.

[Zzyber]

Finally... I don't feel bad responding now...

I stopped keeping track of how many... Because I really don't think it's something that matters. Like alpha, I just can't find someone that keeps me interested for long enough...


So does that mean you batting a thousand?

[Harmony]

So does that mean you batting a thousand?

Hahaha, not quite that high! To get an exact number you'll have to give me a bit. I'm in the double digits. :laugh:

[Chain]

Counting oral? 7
Not counting it? 6
Age: 25

What's the real question? I, for one, may give you additional data or thoughts that would help you along.

[Shinqui]

I'm 37, and I stopped trying to count partners somewhere in the mid twenties (both age and amount), the actual amount would be less than my age, but it would take a lot of time and effort to figure out an exact number.

I guess that's both vague and unhelpful. :p

[auriga vega]

0! I'm 24. Someone has to live up to the "Virgins" part of the forum title.

It has nothing to do with appearance, or lack of fitness; so I have been assured by the opinions of many others. I just don't have time for a serious relationship, and probably won't until I get my Ph.D. Casual sex? The idea in anathema to me.

I know right! It says, INTJ - Masterminds, Innovators, Villains, Virgins

Anyways, 0 for me. I've never been in a real relationship, and casual sex is a no no for me.

[Zzyber]

30 and my count is 1. She was an extrememly long term relationship that ended just before we were to be married.

[nacht]

Because of the nature of this poll I am not sure you can even infer as much as you might want from the results. If you had made it an anonymous poll you might be able to use it strictly as a survey of the people who answered and might even get a reasonable facsimile for the active population of the board, but as it stands there is going to be so much selection bias as to make any question short of "what will a non-random selection of a narrow subset of society admit to."

You may, if you are studying this, be interested in the CDCs numbers (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.).

[SmileyMan]

17 and still a virgin. I've fooled around plenty of times, but I have not had sex (penis-vagina) yet because I have never been in a serious relationship, and I do not feel like making a fool of myself to a drunk semi-stranger because I'm a newbie.

[intjdude]

speaking of CDC, one of the universities I attended had an article that said that 40% of women on campus had some sort of VD.... eeTo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. what a bunch of nasty ho's haha ;D

[rara avis]

speaking of CDC, one of the universities I attended had an article that said that 40% of women on campus had some sort of VD.... eeTo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. what a bunch of nasty ho's haha ;D

Seems to me unlikely that all those VDs spread themselves from girl to girl. What's the male version of a nasty ho? My impression is that college age men tend to be a lot more likely to be cavalier and overconfident about their own health and the damage that they unwittingly do, when sex is on the line. When was the last time you had your equipment checked? It only takes one exposure, ya know...

ANYway.


I'm 32, my number is 2.

[Josephine1012]

Much like Don Juan Demarco my number is 1500+. I stopped counting shortly after I reached puberty....

I just wanted to add some solid data to a highly scientific study that is this thread :lovestruck:

[Lucid]

If you count heterosexual "insert tab A into slot B" intercourse my number is 15 (or so). I'm 28 and I lost my virginity at 15.

I've only had two serious relationships (one that lasted 6 months when I was a teenager, and another that lasted 3 years and ended last spring), however the majority of those 15 were people I was dating for a few months and long term FWBs. I've only ever had one one-night-stand and it turned into the 3 year relationship I mention above.

I see no reason to be ashamed of the number of partners I've had as I don't have sex with just anyone who hits on me. But neither am I uninterested in it.

[ScottH]

I'm 40. My number is 3. Just three LTR's. Lost the V at 16.

I'm surprised to see people balking at the question. While it's not specifically interesting to keep count (unless you're into that sort of thing), posting "I don't keep count" is defensive and sounds like shame. I'm sure nobody here judges.

I get why someone would lose count. At some point, like anything else, it's not so interesting or memorable. I knew a woman who'd slept with 100's and was quite open about it.

(Oh, and FWIW, I love sex and wish my number were much higher... but what can I say, I love strongly and am monogamous ;-)

[Karamazov]

20 and a virgin. I've had acquaintances in the past who were quite cavalier in their pursuits for pleasure (partying, sleeping around), and I could have If I wanted to, but I wasn't interested in the proverbial one-night stand.

There are more important things I want to take care of first, but If the right girl comes along; and, If I get to know her a little bit, I'll bite.

[BostonIan]

I'm 26, and never been to Ladyland. I've received drunken, incomplete oral sex-ish twice in high school, but, not to sound too Clintonian, I certainly hope that doesn't count.

I count it zero with an asterisk, 0*.

[nacht]

Sadly there are long list of STIs which are easier to detect in women than in men and I am not especially fond of the double standard wrt sex and women vs. men.

I'll also throw on that most of those "STIs" in such studies tend to be fairly benign or even non-expressed. HPV, for all the fear and warnings, really isn't that serious when we get right down to it, and many others remain completely asymptomatic for the entire life cycle of the STI.

50-80% of women get HPV at some point by the time they are 50. There are over 100 strains, around 30 of which are "sexually transmitted" and most people's immune systems get rid of it--completely without symptoms--within year. HPV 16 and 18 are responsible for ~70% of cervical cancer cases, but cervical cancer very rarely happens in people getting regular pap smears (1/year, which can detect the cervical intraepithelial neoplasia in the early stages).

For example, there are estimates that state that between 10-20% of college students have chlamydia at any given time. Yikes! Then you realize it very rarely shows symptoms in women.

Heck, many people catch CMV prenatally or oral HSV when they are very young from other children--we just don't talk about them as often. HSV tends to only get counted if it is symptomatic and genital.

[SeaCzar]

~ 15. prior to marriage, 4. Since, I consider this number high, but its because I am not interested another relationship. I'm in my mid forties.

From the CDC study posted by nacht....

Results—Among adults 25–44 years of age, 97 percent of men and 98 percent of women have had vaginal intercourse; 90 percent of men and 88 percent of women have had oral sex with an opposite-sex partner; and 40 percent of men and 35 percent of women have had anal sex with an opposite-sex partner. About 6.5 percent of men 25–44 years of age have had oral or anal sex with another man. Based on a differently worded question, 11 percent of women 25–44 years of age reported having had a sexual experience with another woman. The public health significance of the findings is described.

Does anyone else find this surprising?

[Lucid]

40 percent of men and 35 percent of women have had anal sex with an opposite-sex partner. About 6.5 percent of men 25–44 years of age have had oral or anal sex with another man. Based on a differently worded question, 11 percent of women 25–44 years of age reported having had a sexual experience with another woman. The public health significance of the findings is described.

Does anyone else find this surprising?

Only in how few people are willing to admit to it. I'm sure this number is higher.

[Deliberator]

I'm 23 and I've only done my husband.

I always knew that keeping the number as low as possible would keep my life as simple as possible. It's worked out well so far.

[intjdude]

Seems to me unlikely that all those VDs spread themselves from girl to girl. What's the male version of a nasty ho?

It was spontaneous spread of VD among ho's only, I swear! ;D haha
I knew someone was going to complain about that.

Not to worry, i'm not biased so I'm not blaming the women only. Men are sleazy pigs. We'll bang anything with a nice pair of legs.
Happy? :)

[Lucid]

I notice a lot of people posting in this thread without mentioning their number. This is rather unfair. We all did it. :tiny:

[Harmony]

It was spontaneous spread of VD among ho's only, I swear! ;D haha
I knew someone was going to complain about that.

Not to worry, i'm not biased so I'm not blaming the women only. Men are sleazy pigs. We'll bang anything that looks good
Happy? :)

Well, like nacht said, it's highly possible that some of the guys transmitting these diseases had no idea that had it...

As for me, Going back 13 years and trying to remember all the partners gave me a headache. I'm leaving it at >20 <30. :p

[nacht]

I notice a lot of people posting in this thread without mentioning their number. This is rather unfair. We all did it. :tiny:

Fine fine :p

Age 28, 9 partners.

[intjdude]

50-80% of women get HPV at some point by the time they are 50. There are over 100 strains, around 30 of which are "sexually transmitted" and most people's immune systems get rid of it--completely without symptoms--within year. HPV 16 and 18 are responsible for ~70% of cervical cancer cases, but cervical cancer very rarely happens in people getting regular pap smears (1/year, which can detect the cervical intraepithelial neoplasia in the early stages).

Better be careful with that. It is not known for sure that HPV disappears. It may just go dormant. Furthermore, the girl I know that went for a pap smear came out without a utterus. She's 30 give or take.

[nacht]

Better be careful with that. It is not known for sure that HPV disappears. It may just go dormant. Furthermore, the girl I know that went for a pap smear came out without a utterus. She's 30 give or take.

I never claimed that it was a non-event, having dated a woman who had to have an extremely invasive procedure due to HPV-16, but catching it early with a regular pap smears drastically reduces the probability of a problem, and the odds of actually having a problem are actually extremely low. In most people it will remain asymptomatic their entire life.

[Kisai]

I'm surprised to see people balking at the question. While it's not specifically interesting to keep count (unless you're into that sort of thing), posting "I don't keep count" is defensive and sounds like shame. I'm sure nobody here judges.

I get why someone would lose count. At some point, like anything else, it's not so interesting or memorable. I knew a woman who'd slept with 100's and was quite open about it.



....

The question is akin to 'How many times have you eaten sushi?'

If you've only had it a few times, you can probably remember distinctly each time, whether you liked it or disliked it.

If you've had it a lot, you can remember the most memorable sushi experiences, the first time you ate it or the first time that you ate uni. If you've eaten it a lot, then its safe to say that you like it. Sometimes you have good sushi, sometimes bad, but you still enjoy it and look for quality sushi.

Also, when you have lots of sexual experiences, you realize that sex isn't just penis vagina stuff. I can remember getting pegged by a girl with a candle, which I count as sex even though there's no way anybody's getting pregnant.

[intjdude]

When was the last time you had your equipment checked? It only takes one exposure, ya know...


The expiration date on my firefighting equipment has come and gone. But the equipment is as good as new. I swear! ;D

[Synamon]

One. Many, many times over 26 years. I'm 43 now.

[WaeV]

~ 15. prior to marriage, 4.
11 others since you got married?

Age 17 and 0.

[Lucid]

It's hard for me to imagine only one person. One of the things I love about getting to know someone when you first start dating them, is getting to know what they're like in bed. Maybe that sounds strange, but it's no different from getting to know how they are to eat dinner with or go to parties with. And another thing that's interesting is that there's really no such thing as 'bad' lovers. I think everyone has some talent or something about them that makes it enjoyable with them in a way that is different from everyone else.

Sex is one of the better parts of life IMO. And I've never had it with someone I didn't know. I've never had an STD (sti... whatever), never been pregnant, and while it hasn't all been rainbows and unicorns, nothing in life ever is.

[AthenaCastor]

Wow, I had to choose this thread to make my first "real" posting! Haha! Oh well... onto the facts: I involuntarily lost my virginity at 14. I started having sex voluntarily when I was about 16. I have had 5 male partners and 1 female partner. However, I have never found any personal satisfaction in sex. This is due to a poor choice in partners on my part. I actually regret choosing to have sex at all, but maybe that's because I've never gotten any enjoyment out of it!

[Allie]

Wow, I had to choose this thread to make my first "real" posting! Haha! Oh well... onto the facts: I involuntarily lost my virginity at 14. I started having sex voluntarily when I was about 16. I have had 5 male partners and 1 female partner. However, I have never found any personal satisfaction in sex. This is due to a poor choice in partners on my part. I actually regret choosing to have sex at all, but maybe that's because I've never gotten any enjoyment out of it!


Welcome AthenaCastor!!

I think having sex at such an early age may have an adverse affect in some ways (from minor to major) for some people, especially for one who may not be as mature (emotionally/psychologically). There was even an analysis done on this, if I am not mistaken.

That's just my personal opinion, not judging or anything.


But, what do I know anyway; I have only done it twice, as evidenced by the 2 kids I have :p

[AthenaCastor]

Allie,

Honestly, I think the only reason I began having sex is that I felt "well, my virginity is already gone... so what's the point?" Granted, I now see the fallacy of that way of thinking, but unfortunately, what is done is done and one must simply move on with their life.

[JohnDoe]

0, and quite happy with that number; I'm quite convinced that I could not handle casual sex without getting excessively attached.

[nowandzen]

Ok, but "losing count" or being embarrassed doesn't change reality. I'm trying to prove a few theories for myself, but I don't want to put them out there as it will completely derail this thread. Please add numbers, not "selective amnesia".

These folks in their twenties who feign indifference or say "I don't remember" or "I'm not keeping track" are full of shit. There are some people with massive egos in this forum---and you know who you are.

[ToC]

I never claimed that it was a non-event, having dated a woman who had to have an extremely invasive procedure due to HPV-16, but catching it early with a regular pap smears drastically reduces the probability of a problem, and the odds of actually having a problem are actually extremely low. In most people it will remain asymptomatic their entire life.

fuckkk... every time my sex drive kicks back in and I consider rejoining society I see this shit. Too bad sex with a wetsuit and two condoms isn't the current trend; I'd be set.

[Santana28]

I think having sex at such an early age may have an adverse affect in some ways (from minor to major) for some people, especially for one who may not be as mature (emotionally/psychologically). There was even an analysis done on this, if I am not mistaken.


I haven't read that study, but i have a male friend (ENTP) who lost his virginity to a MUCH older female when he was 13... he has a successful life, seems to function well - but he can't hold down a relationship for the life of him. Sex is a never-ending conquest of the "ideal" of the "perfect" relationship inside his head. His sex life is very mechanical, repetitive, and compulsive. Also, his parents (EXTREMELY liberal) knew about this early on and not only permitted it, but smiled upon it. So he's never had any boundaries set for him. He's 28 now, and unhappy as ever. Extremely intelligent. As much as i'd like to think he could get past this, i'm not unsure that losing his virginity in such a way so early hasn't screwed him up for life.

[Phalanx]

Age: 20; Partners: 0. My plan is to drown myself in hookers once I get my degree.

[intjdude]

The question is akin to 'How many times have you eaten sushi?'



Always with the sushi....
Mention sex and out comes the sushi sooner or later. What exactly are you trying to say? ;D

of all the foods to compare it to...

Perhaps we should try ham & cheese sometime. Or butter and toast.

[Vagrant]

I'm 19.

Total count: 1

Many many times, of course.

I might as well clarify and add that I was 18 when I lost my virginity. Since then, I haven't found somebody I'm mutually interested in, so we have yet to see how much that number will increase.

[CaseBlue]

28 years old, and 12. I think.

[zibber]

25, 2, just numbers.

These folks in their twenties who feign indifference or say "I don't remember" or "I'm not keeping track" are full of shit. There are some people with massive egos in this forum---and you know who you are.

*quietly agrees* :)

[Firebrand]

Ok, much better idea (thanks to intjdude). Put your age in a reply.

Me - 32.

[Firebrand]

Ok. Define 'having sex'. Are we talking about strictly penis-vagina sex?

The following things constitute sex for purposes of this discussion :
- Penis-Vagina
-Penis-Anus
-Vagina-Vagina

So, no, you don't have to be heterosexual for it to be sex. I figured this was a given.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 42 seconds later...

I'm afraid trying to test a theory based on thread responses is doomed to failure. Way, way too much self-selection is involved. Although I have no problem saying it, many virgins are not going to want to admit to such a thing, and likewise those who have had many, many partners are not going to want to put a number to it. Such people will often not respond at all.

Of course they won't respond. That goes without saying. But from the number who did, I'll draw conclusions from those. I'd expect INTJs to not have an issue broaching truth on this topic, though, being that it's a normal INTJ trait to not give a rat's ass what anyone thinks of them.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 38 seconds later...

How will putting the theory out there derail this thread?

Because that will become the subject of replies rather than the thread sticking to the point.


And for some of us I'd wager it's seriously not selective amnesia... It's literally that we stopped counting, and don't feel like wracking our brain over the years to remember all of them.
Uh-huh.... A likely story. Too high to count perhaps?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 41 seconds later...


I lost my virginity at 18, and man did it suck!

Same here...





Firebrand9 added to this post, 3 minutes and 23 seconds later...

an annonymous poll might work better here...


Yeah, damn... Can someone tell me how I can attach a poll?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 10 minutes and 2 seconds later...

I'm 37, and I stopped trying to count partners somewhere in the mid twenties (both age and amount), the actual amount would be less than my age, but it would take a lot of time and effort to figure out an exact number.

I guess that's both vague and unhelpful. :p

Well break out a scientific calculator and get back to us on that one. Yes, yes it is ;)





Firebrand9 added to this post, 3 minutes and 48 seconds later...

If you had made it an anonymous poll you might be able to use it strictly as a survey of the people who answered and might even get a reasonable facsimile for the active population of the board
I agree. I made a poll for this. I'm looking for INTJ-specific data so CDC's statistics won't help.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 3 minutes and 59 seconds later...

Much like Don Juan Demarco my number is 1500+. I stopped counting shortly after I reached puberty....

I just wanted to add some solid data to a highly scientific study that is this thread :lovestruck:

So, based on your picture, I'll bet you're no more than 30 (probably much less), and assuming you hit puberty early at 10, that would be an average of a new partner every 4 days. Do you ever sit down? I mean not on a penis...





Firebrand9 added to this post, 7 minutes and 58 seconds later...


Does anyone else find this surprising?

Yeah! Only 11 percent?!? I've dated multiple bisexual women and that seems to be very "in" and trendy these days. I mean, since you can't just grow your hair long and listen to metal to piss off your parents, you need to switch teams to really get to mom and dad...





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 20 seconds later...

Well, like nacht said, it's highly possible that some of the guys transmitting these diseases had no idea that had it...

Or the girls...





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 46 seconds later...

....

The question is akin to 'How many times have you eaten sushi?'


Except not everyone cares about sushi... Eating sushi does not produce offspring or feel nearly as good. We don't have shows called "Sushi in the City".





Firebrand9 added to this post, 7 minutes and 16 seconds later...

One. Many, many times over 26 years. I'm 43 now.

Care to put a number to that?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 58 seconds later...

.. it's no different from getting to know how they are to eat dinner with or go to parties with.

Except it's a hell of a lot more intimate and personal... People don't get upset if you watch them having dinner or see them at a party.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 41 seconds later...

Wow, I had to choose this thread to make my first "real" posting! Haha! Oh well... onto the facts: I involuntarily lost my virginity at 14. I started having sex voluntarily when I was about 16. I have had 5 male partners and 1 female partner. However, I have never found any personal satisfaction in sex. This is due to a poor choice in partners on my part. I actually regret choosing to have sex at all, but maybe that's because I've never gotten any enjoyment out of it!

The involuntary thing probably made you repress liking it. There's association with that event that you need to break psychologically before you will like it.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 0 seconds later...

These folks in their twenties who feign indifference or say "I don't remember" or "I'm not keeping track" are full of shit. There are some people with massive egos in this forum---and you know who you are.

My sentiments exactly. And everyone here thinks they're the best. It's because most of us are INTJs... It's not ego if it's true.

[Rudy]

Me - Age 24

[Pandemonium]

12 partners. Twenty years old.

[kazzamunga]

Me - 22

[Josephine1012]

So, based on your picture, I'll bet you're no more than 30 (probably much less), and assuming you hit puberty early at 10, that would be an average of a new partner every 4 days. Do you ever sit down? I mean not on a penis...




I may have come to the wrong place, I always thought INTJs were supposed to be good with sarcasm...

In fact, allow me to elaborate on my previous response further: when you're asking such questions expect to receive at least some bogus answers. Note that had I given you a more realistic response you would have no way of knowing that I was lying.

You would be right to suggest that I don't respond to a question I consider personal, but I was bored and felt like making a point.

On a scientific note, your sample only includes people who don't see these matters as private which would significantly impact validity of your data.

I'm fully comfortable with all of the choices I've made in these matters, but I still consider the question too personal in nature to be answered in a public forum.

[Josephine1012]

I'm still failing to see your logic..

but very well, me - 28 years old.

Your only task is to match it up to the number on the anonymous poll.

[Harmony]

27

[Harmony]

Wow, this is just the most fascinating thing ever. The whole reason I said that some of the guys might not know that they had it was because some STDs are impossible to test for in guys. I wasn't saying that girls are pure and never do anything wrong. It's just simply that for some reason HPV is testable in women, but not in men. I'm not attacking anyone, just stating WHY some women know, when men don't.

And perhaps my number is too high for some, but I really don't care about the number. I'm happy, I'm healthy, and know far more people that have been with more than I have.

Also, your thread seems to have been derailed anyway, so what was the difference in revealing your "theory."

[invicta]

What is this, the rudest questions poll? I'm 36. I think you forgot to ask for weight.

[SeaCzar]

11 others since you got married?

Age 17 and 0.


Since I got divorced.

[Harmony]

I'm still failing to see your logic..

but very well, me - 28 years old.

Your only task is to match it up to the number on the anonymous poll.

Which might lead to a new set of problems since there are about twice as many responding to the poll, yet not posting their ages...

[green eyes]

I'm 24.

[Zzyber]

Gonna say 30 and leave the guessing to you.

[Synamon]

I already answered in the other thread.

[rara avis]

32



...I think I'm about 125 lbs. :)

[Kisai]

Vagina-vagina sex? Is that like penis-penis sex? You just bang them together and hope it feels good?

[Chain]

I may have come to the wrong place, I always thought INTJs were supposed to be good with sarcasm...

In fact, allow me to elaborate on my previous response further: when you're asking such questions expect to receive at least some bogus answers. Note that had I given you a more realistic response you would have no way of knowing that I was lying.

You would be right to suggest that I don't respond to a question I consider personal, but I was bored and felt like making a point.

On a scientific note, your sample only includes people who don't see these matters as private which would significantly impact validity of your data.

I'm fully comfortable with all of the choices I've made in these matters, but I still consider the question too personal in nature to be answered in a public forum.


Too personal? WTH is that?

[Synamon]

Too personal? WTH is that?
A polite way of saying that it's none of your business.

[Josephine1012]

Too personal? WTH is that?

Are you not familiar with the concept?

It's a good one to look into.

[Shinqui]

Are you not familiar with the concept?

It's a good one to look into.

Well, to be fair Josephine, I doubt many INTJ's are overly concerned with information being too personal for them to share and analyze. At least that's been my own experience.

However, to the rest of you, leave the eNFp alone, she doesn't want to share this information.

My J perfectionist tendancies are forcing me to try and figure out my previous partners. This is a major pain in the a$$. I'm at 23 so far, but it's pretty hazy, lot's of entries like;

Teenage girl
Heroin girl
Jennifer
Army girl
Cheryl
Older girl
Brenda
Young guy
Stripper
Goth girl

So that makes things difficult, not to mention the giant holes in my memory from week or even month long mobile parties. I'm going to place my estimate at approximately 26 women and 2 men. I do not agree with previous poster's here that state that people in their twenties who claim to not remember all their sexual partners are full of crap. Some people treat sex very casually and have it often with other like minded people. Not to mention parties, orgies, drunken blackouts and other life experiences.

Anyway, just my two cents, put it towards a box of condoms. :)

[Hatsumomo1]

What would account for a higher number of partners for an INTJ? We're not exactly social butterflies to be flitting about meeting people to have sex with.

[Lucid]

Wow, this is just the most fascinating thing ever. The whole reason I said that some of the guys might not know that they had it was because some STDs are impossible to test for in guys. I wasn't saying that girls are pure and never do anything wrong. It's just simply that for some reason HPV is testable in women, but not in men. I'm not attacking anyone, just stating WHY some women know, when men don't.

And perhaps my number is too high for some, but I really don't care about the number. I'm happy, I'm healthy, and know far more people that have been with more than I have.

Also, your thread seems to have been derailed anyway, so what was the difference in revealing your "theory."

You can test for HPV in men, but it's not something they do unless you request it specially. To the best of my knowledge, you can test for every disease in both genders.

[invicta]

What would account for a higher number of partners for an INTJ? We're not exactly social butterflies to be flitting about meeting people to have sex with.

I think it has to do with less game playing with regards to sexual encounters.

[intjdude]

The following things constitute sex for purposes of this discussion :
- Penis-Vagina
-Penis-Anus
-Vagina-Vagina

So, no, you don't have to be heterosexual for it to be sex. I figured this was a given.


Why are you only concerned with the narrow part of the sex definition anyway? Isn't any activity with 'equipment', 'physical touch', and 'sexual intent' considered real sex?

I think when the girl is slurping, flipping and flopping, and then you shoot it in her eye is sex.

Why do both have to be excercising the equipment to be considered sex?

[Harmony]

You can test for HPV in men, but it's not something they do unless you request it specially. To the best of my knowledge, you can test for every disease in both genders.

Really? My gyno told me that it's not possible to test a male for all strains of HPV.

EDIT: This was several years back, so my info might be out of date if they have found a way to test for it.

[MusicWorld]

34

[blckprljinju]

22... 23 on 2.2.09... 6-_-;;;
i weigh.... a lot.

[Shinqui]

37, 180 pounds or so. :p

[Synamon]

For me, sex is super intense and is profoundly meaningful to me, and isn't something I can share easily. I also don't want to be with someone who's going to be gossiping about it later. I don't care for that at all. The details of my sex life are private to me and I would want to be with women who respect that.


Does anyone else see the irony of not wanting people to gossip about sex and starting this thread?

You asked me a follow up question of how many times I've had sex over 26 years. I know that they say there are no stupid questions, but I have to disagree.

Oh wait, what you meant was that married people stop having sex right? That goes double if they are your parents doesn't it, yours only had sex once didn't they. Let's see, a couple of times a year just to see if it still works would be 50, and daily would be around 10,000, so somewhere between those. Let me just go check my calendar, since I put a big X through the days I have sex. :rolleyes:

[Harmony]

Does anyone else see the irony of not wanting people to gossip about sex and starting this thread?

Well I know two people that caught the irony in this... We were talking about it earlier.

[MacGuffin]

Let me just go check my calendar, since I put a big X through the days I have sex. :rolleyes:
How J of you!

[BostonIan]

Still 26 years old, 184 pounds.

[ToC]

hahah... That's a bell curve if I ever saw one.

[dalidaisy]

Ok, I don't want anyone wandering about why I haven't posted here yet, so here it is...

I'm 35. I started having sex at the ripe old age of 12 (go ahead & start analyzing).

So, ok, when it comes to numbers, I can't be clear. I don't keep a log or mark each time I have sex down somewhere, but I can say the number would be quite significant.

Geez, I don't like being scrutinized & would never think of myself as a slut, but if I had to fathom a guess, I'd go with 33.

So, in my 23 years of sexual experience, with 13 of those being with just 3 partners (in committed relationships), I had sex with 30 people (ouside of commitment) in 10 years. That's 3 per year if you average it out (in some instances, they were at the same time, if that helps). I will not even try to imagine how many TIMES I've had sex with each of these people.

Now, as the OP posted, I also find sex quite a profound experience. I do not share myself with just anyone. My body is something I hold in high regard & I guard it fiercely. Diseases are unacceptable & a person with no respect for my body will not be touching it. Although I have had many partners (as it would seem so from the previous responses), I am very picky about who I have sex with.

Sex just happens to be something I enjoy immensely & as I've said before, I do not need love or promises in order to satisfy a physical desire.

I hope this helps with forming your theories. Will you be sharing them?

[intjdude]

Ok, I don't want anyone wandering about why I haven't posted here yet, so here it is...

I'm 35. I started having sex at the ripe old age of 12 (go ahead & start analyzing).

So, ok, when it comes to numbers, I can't be clear. I don't keep a log or mark each time I have sex down somewhere, but I can say the number would be quite significant.

Geez, I don't like being scrutinized & would never think of myself as a slut, but if I had to fathom a guess, I'd go with 33.

So, in my 23 years of sexual experience, with 13 of those being with just 3 partners (in committed relationships), I had sex with 30 people (ouside of commitment) in 10 years. That's 3 per year if you average it out (in some instances, they were at the same time, if that helps). I will not even try to imagine how many TIMES I've had sex with each of these people.

Now, as the OP posted, I also find sex quite a profound experience. I do not share myself with just anyone. My body is something I hold in high regard & I guard it fiercely. Diseases are unacceptable & a person with no respect for my body will not be touching it. Although I have had many partners (as it would seem so from the previous responses), I am very picky about who I have sex with.

Sex just happens to be something I enjoy immensely & as I've said before, I do not need love or promises in order to satisfy a physical desire.

I hope this helps with forming your theories. Will you be sharing them?

My god lady :stunned:

It sounds like you had sex every time you went through the checkout counter. haha j/k

[Phalanx]

For science. Age: 20 // Body Fat: 6.9%

[ToC]

We as INTJs are great planners. We see a problem and how to fix said problem. Problem = Stress/Tension, Solution = Orgasm. There happen to be some nooks and crannies us guys can get to that you can't by yourself. Therefore you're not a slut, just a problem solver ^^.

[dalidaisy]

My god lady :stunned:

It sounds like you had sex every time you went through the checkout counter. haha jk

Thanks! I'd say this is the reason others with high numbers aren't posting. Oh well, bring it on! I'm not ashamed...

[ToC]

Age 18, Weight 165, Height 5'11, Length ##.#

[Synamon]

Thanks! I'd say this is the reason others with high numbers aren't posting. Oh well, bring it on! I'm not ashamed...
They are just jealous. Nothing to be ashamed about at all.

[Kisai]

I'm guessing I'm in the 20-30 range. Not in the 100's.

But buy me a beer and we'll talk.

[intjdude]

Thanks! I'd say this is the reason others with high numbers aren't posting. Oh well, bring it on! I'm not ashamed...

you mean there's more?

But seriously, i don't really care actually... i just find the comment humorous. ;D

[Harmony]

I'm guessing I'm in the 20-30 range. Not in the 100's.

But buy me a beer and we'll talk.

Yeah, Like I posted earlier... I'm >20 <30.. =P Sex seems to be casual among a lot of folks in my city/tri-state...

Coors Light okay? ;)

[nacht]

28.





nacht added to this post, 2 minutes and 0 seconds later...

What would account for a higher number of partners for an INTJ? We're not exactly social butterflies to be flitting about meeting people to have sex with.

I don't think that's the case.

If we were to take this poll at its current level as a random sample of INTJs at-large (hahahaha) we would find the median to be... 1.

The median for lifetime sexual partners among 15--44 year olds is closer to 5 (varying by gender).

What we see here is at least roughly the distribution I would expect with a lot of virgins (younger populations on forums will tend to have a higher level of those), a long tail, and a sharp uptick at the end for those who have had "lots."

[Santana28]

oh josephine, noone here will think less of you for being honest :) i know you enfps like to have things drug out of you.. it shows we care, putting all that effort into getting you to open up and tell the truth!

if it makes you feel any better, my enfp was 19 and claimed to have been with 28 people. he went to med school young, pledged into a fraternity... and the rest from there was history.

why was a 27 year old sleeping with a 19 year old? because i can, dangit! haha. it was fun.

and for the record, all of my sexual relationships were very meaningful to me and intimate and i consider them all to be great friends and cherish them for who they are... it was not all just about 'hooking up' for me. although, i wish i could bring myself to do that at times... things would be much easier....

27

[Jouk]

26

[Chain]

Are you not familiar with the concept?

It's a good one to look into.

I should've known you'd take that as a crack against you...

I was trying to prove a point about a flaw in your response that too many people don't care to share "personal" information. Here's the long version:

In the general population, you'd be absolutely correct. However, the vast majority of this board is composed of people with personalities that tend to have broken give-a-damn's when it comes to what people think of them; especially people miles away behind computers. That said- and I don't expect you to be able to relate to it- not sharing information because it's too "personal" is all but a foreign concept to us; and therefore, should not be a problem.

I'm not attacking you, I'm trying to help you better your understanding about the type of people you're choosing to deal with.

And what's the problem with slutty women? I happen to prefer mine that way.

[intjdude]

I'm still failing to see your logic..

but very well, me - 28 years old.

Your only task is to match it up to the number on the anonymous poll.

you are correct... the poll is still skewed because we don't really know how the ages correlate... not only that but we have non-INTJs voting...

someone who has 32 total and is 26 could be as sexually free as someone who is 90 and has 160 total partners... technically both average 2 per year if they started at 10

anyway, my J says that INTJs in general don't get laid (with diff people) as much as other types...

some people seem to have more sexual partners than i've had close friends... i don't think my numbers in close friends are even double digits... it's sad :cry:

[Lucid]

28... 19+ based on the criteria laid out in the previous thread.

[Autoptic]

28 and 0

Seriously, how many people would really have close friends in the double digits?

I can see the numbers skewing anyway. Past some point it might not only get easier but have less emotional affect.

[Harmony]

28 and 0

Seriously, how many people would really have close friends in the double digits?

I can see the numbers skewing anyway. Past some point it might not only get easier but have less emotional affect.

Agreed... I have friends in the double digits, but only maybe two people total I classify as close friends...

Not sure about others, but as far as I see it, you are correct in the fact that it loses it's emotional affect....

[penny lane]

25

[intjdude]

I should've known you'd take that as a crack against you...

I was trying to prove a point about a flaw in your response that too many people don't care to share "personal" information. Here's the long version:

In the general population, you'd be absolutely correct. However, the vast majority of this board is composed of people with personalities that tend to have broken give-a-damn's when it comes to what people think of them; especially people miles away behind computers. That said- and I don't expect you to be able to relate to it- not sharing information because it's too "personal" is all but a foreign concept to us; and therefore, should not be a problem.

I'm not attacking you, I'm trying to help you better your understanding about the type of people you're choosing to deal with.

And what's the problem with slutty women? I happen to prefer mine that way.


I think we got this perception backwards... it's the ones with the low numbers that are most embarassed ... not the other way around...

take a look at the poll and compare the 0s to the number of posters who've claimed zero on this thread...

[intjdude]

Agreed... I have friends in the double digits, but only maybe two people total I classify as close friends...

Not sure about others, but as far as I see it, you are correct in the fact that it loses it's emotional affect....


Perhaps this is where it gets interesting here... see, personally, i wouldn't normally touch someone's goodies unless they were a close friend to start with... so it's an impossibility for me to be in the double digits...

It would be interesting to find out which way INTJs lean mostly
1) Close friendship a requirement for sex
2) Close friendship NOT a requirement for sex

My guess is #1... at least relative to other types... it would fit the 'reserved' personality

[Chain]

25. 5'6", 125 lbs, 9% BF.

[darkeldar88]

20yrs and 0. Im sure i'll get there eventaually and im in no great hurry

[LaoTzu]

hahaha!

what was that number? 37? lol!

[LaoTzu]

35. 7inchesx7inches

[Calagnethil]

23. What is "friend"? Someone you hang out with?

Marriage requirement for sex. I'm not married yet... (hehe)

[kira]

33

[intjdude]

23. What is "friend"? Someone you hang out with?

Marriage requirement for sex. I'm not married yet... (hehe)

Good question... yeah i'd say someone you hang out with on a somewhat regular basis is a friend... doesn't have to be very often though...

As opposed to an acquaintance which is someone you see once in a while but you don't really share many details with... you don't have the urge to either.

[Tempest]

I'm 20 and have had sex with 3 people. I lost my virginity shortly after my 18th birthday. Losing my virginity was such a horrible experience. I'm glad it only has to happen once.

[Josephine1012]

oh josephine, noone here will think less of you for being honest :) i know you enfps like to have things drug out of you.. it shows we care, putting all that effort into getting you to open up and tell the truth!



I should've known you'd take that as a crack against you...

I was trying to prove a point about a flaw in your response that too many people don't care to share "personal" information. Here's the long version:

In the general population, you'd be absolutely correct. However, the vast majority of this board is composed of people with personalities that tend to have broken give-a-damn's when it comes to what people think of them; especially people miles away behind computers. That said- and I don't expect you to be able to relate to it- not sharing information because it's too "personal" is all but a foreign concept to us; and therefore, should not be a problem.

I'm not attacking you, I'm trying to help you better your understanding about the type of people you're choosing to deal with.

And what's the problem with slutty women? I happen to prefer mine that way.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I think you may be missing the point of my post. I'm really of the opinion that the number alone doesn't signify much outside of our life circumstances and perhaps sex drive, with a little bit of our personal choice thrown in for good measure. The only way it would be in any way relevant to me would be in a romantic partner, where I simply hope to be with a similarly minded person.

I find the line of questioning and the intensity with which it is pursued strengthening my resolve to remain publicly mysterious, simply for the heck of it. I do find it very interesting that my stand on the subject makes you assume that it's high AND that I'm embarrassed...

If my sexual history is truly killing your curiosity, feel free to PM me and I may or may not tell you :p

[intjdude]

Ladies and gentlemen,

I think you may be missing the point of my post. I'm really of the opinion that the number alone doesn't signify much outside of our life circumstances and perhaps sex drive, with a little bit of our personal choice thrown in for good measure. The only way it would be in any way relevant to me would be in a romantic partner, where I simply hope to be with a similarly minded person.

I find the line of questioning and the intensity with which it is pursued strengthening my resolve to remain publicly mysterious, simply for the heck of it. I do find it very interesting that my stand on the subject makes you assume that it's high AND that I'm embarrassed...

If my sexual history is truly killing your curiosity, feel free to PM me and I may or may not tell you :p


I got a $100 bucks your number is 0... or maybe 1 ;D

[True Rune]

Age: 21
Sex Partners: 0
Justification: I have no sex drive, and even if I did, I would wait until marriage.
Though I'd probably still be one even if I weren't asexual.

[BostonIan]

Josephine just pm'ed me, and the number is four and a half. I guess the "half" is what she's embarrassed about. She was hostessing at a "little persons" convention, had a few too many drinks, one thing led to another...hey, it was college.

(Kidding.)

I remember one episode of Dr. Phil, where the "secret to reveal" gotcha show was a wife telling her new husband that she had slept with hundreds of people. He burst into tears, they got divorced, and I'd be very curious who the audience sympathized with. I think the number does matter, if only because of other people and their reactions to it. But that's probably all the more reason why this thread should have been trodden more lightly.

There was always that guy in high school who would sweet-talk a woman/girl to get her into bed, then tell his friends what a whore she is. On a cultural level, it's similar. Generally, men want women for sex out of a life-long partnership, but they're also an increment more judging of a woman for having had it with other men. If we're going to have sex outside of permanent relationships, by the end of a woman's life, she could have averaged less than one partner per year and still end up with dozens and dozens of lovers.

[Josephine1012]

Josephine just pm'ed me, and the number is four and a half. I guess the "half" is what she's embarrassed about. She was hostessing at a "little persons" convention, had a few too many drinks, one thing led to another...hey, it was college.

(Kidding.)


The half was for the donkey and not the midget. I'm simply amazed at how you guys do math around here :pimp:

Sheesh!!!!

[intjdude]

The half was for the donkey and not the midget.


what a whore ;D

[Josephine1012]

what a whore ;D

There there

*pats intjdude on the head*

I understand your frustrations, you DID just lose $100!

*wonders how legally binding forum posts really are....*

[zibber]

Do you ever sit down? I mean not on a penis...


BABOOM!

:laugh:

[kdm]

22

[Synamon]

All the poll seems to show is that virgins like to respond to anonymous polls.

[Harmony]

Is this a big deal? I've had way more sex than most everyone I know. Should I be feeling bad about it? Cause I don't...

Ha! No, I feel inferior. =( Just kidding. Most of the people I know have had sex with more people, but haven't experimented as much as me. ;)

[Shinqui]

Is this a big deal? I've had way more sex than most everyone I know. Should I be feeling bad about it? Cause I don't...

Nah, I remember comparing numbers with my best friend at the time in my twenties. He said something like, "talk to me when you pass 100". Thing is, it was dead serious, he just loved life, loved sex and women responded to it.

In retrospect, I should've slept with him. :p

[NancyS786]

43 years old. Lots. Can't even guess within 10 or so.

Honestly didn't sleep around nearly as much when I was younger. I probably had a count before last year.

But rediscovering a lost sex drive at 42 has changed me in this way.

Wouldn't have done it without condoms though....

[intjdude]

There there

*pats intjdude on the head*

I understand your frustrations, you DID just lose $100!

*wonders how legally binding forum posts really are....*

Can i borrow $100? I owe someone ;D

[lamplighter]

I guess I'm lucky, my first time was pretty good, it kept me coming back for more for 2 years. I've only been with 4 people though, but for at least a year each, and lost my virginity at 18. I did know a girl who was 15 who had been with 30 people I personally knew, plus many more, I would say about 50 total, so would that count as too much? I would've been 51 but I was afraid of catching something personally.

[intjdude]

43 years old. Lots. Can't even guess within 10 or so.

Honestly didn't sleep around nearly as much when I was younger. I probably had a count before last year.

But rediscovering a lost sex drive at 42 has changed me in this way.

Wouldn't have done it without condoms though....

yeah i can see that happening... but what I'm wondering is: Are you looking for variety on purpose? Or is it just turning out that way because none of them interest you enough to stick with one? It sounds like it's a lifestyle now...

[Chain]

That's your definition of the word, or are you amending your statement?

My definition. Promiscuity is a sign of that- for lack of better words at the moment.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I think you may be missing the point of my post. I'm really of the opinion that the number alone doesn't signify much outside of our life circumstances and perhaps sex drive, with a little bit of our personal choice thrown in for good measure. The only way it would be in any way relevant to me would be in a romantic partner, where I simply hope to be with a similarly minded person.

I find the line of questioning and the intensity with which it is pursued strengthening my resolve to remain publicly mysterious, simply for the heck of it. I do find it very interesting that my stand on the subject makes you assume that it's high AND that I'm embarrassed...

If my sexual history is truly killing your curiosity, feel free to PM me and I may or may not tell you :p

You obviously didn't understand a word I said. Stop looking at what you think I wrote and look at what I did. I didn't allude to anything, I wrote exactly what I meant: "too personal" is something YOU consider important; but to most INTJ's, information is simply information. I couldn't care less about your history, I was merely pointing out a fundamental flaw in the reasoning of that particular post.

[Synamon]

You obviously didn't understand a word I said. Stop looking at what you think I wrote and look at what I did. I didn't allude to anything, I wrote exactly what I meant: "too personal" is something YOU consider important; but to most INTJ's, information is simply information. I couldn't care less about your history, I was merely pointing out a fundamental flaw in the reasoning of that particular post.
Then let me point out the flaw in your reasoning too. Most INTJs didn't post in this thread so perhaps most do think the information is too personal. You are making assumptions. Most INTJs I've come across are very private and posting about their sexual history on a public forum would be too personal for them.

[dalidaisy]

Then let me point out the flaw in your reasoning too. Most INTJs didn't post in this thread so perhaps most do think the information is too personal. You are making assumptions. Most INTJs I've come across are very private and posting about their sexual history on a public forum would be too personal for them.

Well, I'm actually very private in real life. I figured this site is fairly anonymous & I was just trying to give some info for the OP to mull over. You guys are the only ones who know this much personally information about me.

I would say that she is correct in thinking that INTJs are fiercly private & not apt to divulge personal information such as this.

[Josephine1012]

Then let me point out the flaw in your reasoning too. Most INTJs didn't post in this thread so perhaps most do think the information is too personal. You are making assumptions. Most INTJs I've come across are very private and posting about their sexual history on a public forum would be too personal for them.


a) What she said ^^ which goes in line with implying that no information is too personal, which is clearly the place where you and I disagree.

b) The line that i should have highlighted better for my reference was


And what's the problem with slutty women? I happen to prefer mine that way.

Which is where you make assumptions.


You obviously didn't understand a word I said. Stop looking at what you think I wrote and look at what I did. I didn't allude to anything, I wrote exactly what I meant: "too personal" is something YOU consider important; but to most INTJ's, information is simply information. I couldn't care less about your history, I was merely pointing out a fundamental flaw in the reasoning of that particular post.


the words "self-centered" come to mind....
do consider that when other people post, they talk about their views on the subject related to the OP or other posts. Your view is not universal, it is merely your opinion, you seem to treat it as gospel.

[Chain]

Then let me point out the flaw in your reasoning too. Most INTJs didn't post in this thread so perhaps most do think the information is too personal. You are making assumptions. Most INTJs I've come across are very private and posting about their sexual history on a public forum would be too personal for them.

It could also be evidence that the topic isn't worth discussing; but you do have a good point. Most of the ones I know would look at it as irrelevant; but then again, my experience is a bit biased since I spend a lot of time in BDSM circles.

[Harmony]

I'm just curious... But what does BDSM have to do with anything?

[Nikita]

I got a $100 bucks your number is 0... or maybe 1 ;D

There there

*pats intjdude on the head*

I understand your frustrations, you DID just lose $100!

*wonders how legally binding forum posts really are....*

hmm...well it's a written offer...Guffy? Opinion? :p


And for the record, my number is 0.

[Chain]

Which is where you make assumptions.




the words "self-centered" come to mind....
do consider that when other people post, they talk about their views on the subject related to the OP or other posts. Your view is not universal, it is merely your opinion, you seem to treat it as gospel.

As I said in a following post, that was a different topic and had nothing to do with you.

Yes, I do. I don't treat it as gospel; all conclusions are debatable.

[Zzyber]

I'm just curious... But what does BDSM have to do with anything?

I will repost this for the answer that you so desperately want. Stop bugging me on the phone already!

[Chain]

I'm just curious... But what does BDSM have to do with anything?

The people that discuss it, usually just to get to that point, have to put aside rather large inhibitions about discussing "personal" information. I'm not used to their being a block on "sexual history" information.

[dogwoodlover]

19 years old, one life partner, we both lost our virginity when we were 16.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I'm 20 years old.

[Mina]

I'm 19 years old. Female.

3 sexual partners thus far, all of whom were boyfriends.

I would never have sex with a stranger, but maybe a close friend, provided that he's attractive.

[Eric86]

0 partners and I'm 22.

[Anreader]

0 partners age 22

[INTJoe]

I'm 29 and I've violated over 900 women, most of whom had hearts that beat.

[True Rune]

21 years.
0 partners.

[dragonsscout]

Age:20
Partners:0

And just for kicks... :laugh:

Height: 6'0" (1.83 meters)
Weight: ~150 lbs (~69 kilos)

[LesMoore]

I stopped counting shortly after 50, I seem to be the exception here. That was sometime in the mid 1990s.

[NancyS786]

yeah i can see that happening... but what I'm wondering is: Are you looking for variety on purpose? Or is it just turning out that way because none of them interest you enough to stick with one? It sounds like it's a lifestyle now...

Sorry to be confusing - don't think it's a lifestyle....

Well, let's just say it's really really easy for a woman to meet a man through craigslist. Gotta post a pic though.

But wow, met so many men that - even if they were perfectly decent - well, I just didn't hit if off with them at all.

But eventually met an INTP. He's driving me a bit crazy, and I think maybe I should get away, but I've found myself being monogamous again.... Well, and INTP may not be ideal, but it's better than the average lot of people I just don't get.

I'm thinking of posting again and forcing respondents to take a personality test, and only meet INTJs. I think there might just be enough men on craigslist for that to work. Anybody tried anything like that?

[daydreamer]

i'm happy with quality over quantity, even with close friends, anyday





daydreamer added to this post, 0 minutes and 57 seconds later...

ha ha !

[randuincanus]

25 and 0

[MaleVolentworld]

In my imagination I would say I've had sex with about a thousand...most of them are famous actresses, singers, sports stars. They were all great...oh I saw lots of cheerleaders today too, had them all...I've had several forum members... I don't like to brag but I'm way ahead of everyone else here.

[Calagnethil]

Good question... yeah i'd say someone you hang out with on a somewhat regular basis is a friend... doesn't have to be very often though...

As opposed to an acquaintance which is someone you see once in a while but you don't really share many details with... you don't have the urge to either.

I'll largely agree to this definition. Someone you used to hang out with regularly, but not anymore, will be an old friend, if you still feel a certain attachment or connection there.

[Henry]

I'm having Clerks flashbacks.

Look: different strokes for different folks, ok?

If you are a prude or a virgin, that's just fine.
If you're a lavicious carnival of lurid slut flesh, that's just fine.(call me!)


But each group of people stop judging the other end of the spectrum. If you're jealous and you want to change but don't know how: ask. If your jealous but don't want to change: stop calling sour grapes.

An orange is an orange. Blowing someone you aren't dating is questionable. Blowing a stranger would pretty much make you a slut.

Of course that's IMO, just as all of this is; this is social reality, which is totally unverifiable and impossible to "prove".

[citationneeded]

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Thought that video would lighten up the mood a bit.


Lost at 19, now 21, 1 partner.

[Firebrand]

I may have come to the wrong place, I always thought INTJs were supposed to be good with sarcasm...

Same could be said for ENFP's.


In fact, allow me to elaborate on my previous response further: when you're asking such questions expect to receive at least some bogus answers. Note that had I given you a more realistic response you would have no way of knowing that I was lying.

Then what would be the point of responding?



You would be right to suggest that I don't respond to a question I consider personal, but I was bored and felt like making a point.

Which was? Adding silly data just to say that people can possibly lie? No kidding. See my above reply.



On a scientific note, your sample only includes people who don't see these matters as private which would significantly impact validity of your data.

Very good point.


I'm fully comfortable with all of the choices I've made in these matters, but I still consider the question too personal in nature to be answered in a public forum.

So then don't answer this post. Simple.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 7 minutes and 0 seconds later...

Wow, this is just the most fascinating thing ever. The whole reason I said that some of the guys might not know that they had it was because some STDs are impossible to test for in guys. I wasn't saying that girls are pure and never do anything wrong. It's just simply that for some reason HPV is testable in women, but not in men. I'm not attacking anyone, just stating WHY some women know, when men don't.

And perhaps my number is too high for some, but I really don't care about the number. I'm happy, I'm healthy, and know far more people that have been with more than I have.

Also, your thread seems to have been derailed anyway, so what was the difference in revealing your "theory."

Interesting point with the gender-based testing. I'm not judging you for your number. You made your choices and you're the one who has to live with them. If you're fine with it, great!

My theory is that women, in general seem to have more partners than men. (Which is why I asked straight-out instead of a poll. The poll's statistics are not nearly as easy to draw from and really pretty much violated the formation of the theory.) There's a lot of reasons I think for this, but in most of the women I know and have talked to, this has been true. INTJ's tend to be different birds and less prone to falling in with the crowd, so I wanted to see if this still held true or was different when it comes to INTJ's. So now that you know (and this reply is late as I'm on here maybe once a week), what do you think?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 0 minutes and 46 seconds later...

What is this, the rudest questions poll? I'm 36. I think you forgot to ask for weight.
What's your weight?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 42 seconds later...

Which might lead to a new set of problems since there are about twice as many responding to the poll, yet not posting their ages...

Ages would've been helpful but not required for my theory. Ages may've signified something in younger people with higher numbers. Most people I know scale back on this after collage.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 3 seconds later...

Vagina-vagina sex? Is that like penis-penis sex? You just bang them together and hope it feels good?

Sure man! Didn't you ever hear of scissoring?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 17 seconds later...

Too personal? WTH is that?

Thank you. How hard is it to not answer? That actually takes less effort.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 0 minutes and 57 seconds later...

A polite way of saying that it's none of your business.
Then don't answer... This isn't rocket science people!





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 43 seconds later...

Why are you only concerned with the narrow part of the sex definition anyway? Isn't any activity with 'equipment', 'physical touch', and 'sexual intent' considered real sex?

I think when the girl is slurping, flipping and flopping, and then you shoot it in her eye is sex.

Why do both have to be excercising the equipment to be considered sex?

You're right in a sense. Oral sex is a form of sex. But normally you don't consider yourself not a virgin anymore from just having oral sex, or touching, etc. So that was what I was looking for. Also, it's usually a somewhat bigger deal, at least for most, to have actual sex, rather than something that is generally considered foreplay.

[Harmony]

Interesting point with the gender-based testing. I'm not judging you for your number. You made your choices and you're the one who has to live with them. If you're fine with it, great!

My theory is that women, in general seem to have more partners than men. There's a lot of reasons I think for this, but in most of the women I know and have talked to, this has been true. INTJ's tend to be different birds and less prone to falling in with the crowd, so I wanted to see if this still held true or was different when it comes to INTJ's. So now that you know (and this reply is late as I'm on here maybe once a week), what do you think?

For starters, I'm not an INTJ. I am INTP/ENTP... Sooo, I don't fall into that theory...

As far as women having more partners than men, from my experience around my city it's the other way around. Of course, it could be that the woman may be ashamed to admit their actual number.

I can list three guys off the top of my head without even thinking that have been with more than 50 women. I can't list a single woman I know that is even close to that. Even my friend who was a stripper has only been with about 15 men. And she wasn't shy about sex, so I'm certain she wasn't lieing.

However, like I said I have no way of knowing if the others are telling the truth. I don't make it a point to hook my friends to polygraph tests. ;)

And who knows, maybe your theory is correct, from my side of things the people I know it's hard to tell. I have several girl friends that aren't sexually active at all, some that are, and then I have my over sexed guy friends and the one virgin guy. :p

For others their circle of friends might be completely different statistics than mine. I still say a lot has to do with the region they live in. :p

[Firebrand]

Does anyone else see the irony of not wanting people to gossip about sex and starting this thread?

You asked me a follow up question of how many times I've had sex over 26 years. I know that they say there are no stupid questions, but I have to disagree.

Oh wait, what you meant was that married people stop having sex right? That goes double if they are your parents doesn't it, yours only had sex once didn't they. Let's see, a couple of times a year just to see if it still works would be 50, and daily would be around 10,000, so somewhere between those. Let me just go check my calendar, since I put a big X through the days I have sex. :rolleyes:

I see that you put one. Ok, that was my mistake. Must've been reading too fast. No irony, I want statistics. I don't want details beyond the number. And, I asked how many partners you had, not how many times you've had sex. So your backlash is unnecessary. Read the original topic.
I have no implications for married people. Don't put words in my mouth.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 8 minutes and 56 seconds later...

For starters, I'm not an INTJ. I am INTP/ENTP... Sooo, I don't fall into that theory...

As far as women having more partners than men, from my experience around my city it's the other way around. Of course, it could be that the woman may be ashamed to admit their actual number.

I can list three guys off the top of my head without even thinking that have been with more than 50 women. I can't list a single woman I know that is even close to that. Even my friend who was a stripper has only been with about 15 men. And she wasn't shy about sex, so I'm certain she wasn't lieing.

However, like I said I have no way of knowing if the others are telling the truth. I don't make it a point to hook my friends to polygraph tests. ;)

And who knows, maybe your theory is correct, from my side of things the people I know it's hard to tell. I have several girl friends that aren't sexually active at all, some that are, and then I have my over sexed guy friends and the one virgin guy. :p

For others their circle of friends might be completely different statistics than mine. I still say a lot has to do with the region they live in. :p

Yeah, perhaps you don't fulfill the original theory but your statistics are still useful. Yeah, I agree on the point that when men go apeshit on sex, they really go. I knew 1 guy who had been with over 250 women (so he says). I find this unfathomable.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 0 minutes and 57 seconds later...

Well I know two people that caught the irony in this... We were talking about it earlier.
Statistics, not details or exploits. Do you know what I mean by this?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 47 seconds later...

Ok, I don't want anyone wandering about why I haven't posted here yet, so here it is...

I'm 35. I started having sex at the ripe old age of 12 (go ahead & start analyzing).

So, ok, when it comes to numbers, I can't be clear. I don't keep a log or mark each time I have sex down somewhere, but I can say the number would be quite significant.

Geez, I don't like being scrutinized & would never think of myself as a slut, but if I had to fathom a guess, I'd go with 33.

So, in my 23 years of sexual experience, with 13 of those being with just 3 partners (in committed relationships), I had sex with 30 people (ouside of commitment) in 10 years. That's 3 per year if you average it out (in some instances, they were at the same time, if that helps). I will not even try to imagine how many TIMES I've had sex with each of these people.

Now, as the OP posted, I also find sex quite a profound experience. I do not share myself with just anyone. My body is something I hold in high regard & I guard it fiercely. Diseases are unacceptable & a person with no respect for my body will not be touching it. Although I have had many partners (as it would seem so from the previous responses), I am very picky about who I have sex with.

Sex just happens to be something I enjoy immensely & as I've said before, I do not need love or promises in order to satisfy a physical desire.

I hope this helps with forming your theories. Will you be sharing them?

Wow, great statistics. Like I said, I'm not judging you on this, that's your job. But great info. Thank you. I posted my theory which is already being picked at so feel free to pick at it yourself.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 24 seconds later...

They are just jealous. Nothing to be ashamed about at all.

Are you sure you're not an INFJ?





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 18 seconds later...

I'm guessing I'm in the 20-30 range. Not in the 100's.

But buy me a beer and we'll talk.

Thanks man, I'll do the beer but I don't want your details! TMI. Just looking at numbers.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 51 seconds later...

you are correct... the poll is still skewed because we don't really know how the ages correlate... not only that but we have non-INTJs voting...

The non-INTJ's is less an issue than the ages correlating to an anoymous poll. Most people here are INTJ's so the few that aren't that are replying doesn't really throw off my theory-gathering by much.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 40 seconds later...

28 and 0

Seriously, how many people would really have close friends in the double digits?

I can see the numbers skewing anyway. Past some point it might not only get easier but have less emotional affect.
Yup. Agreed. Desensitization.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 11 seconds later...

Agreed... I have friends in the double digits, but only maybe two people total I classify as close friends...


I make a distinction between friends and acquaintances though. If you don't hang out with them ever, then they're the later. If you do, at least once in a while, they're the former. Close friends, much more often and you share more with them.


Not sure about others, but as far as I see it, you are correct in the fact that it loses it's emotional affect....

Which is exactly why I don't have higher numbers.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 3 minutes and 33 seconds later...

Perhaps this is where it gets interesting here... see, personally, i wouldn't normally touch someone's goodies unless they were a close friend to start with... so it's an impossibility for me to be in the double digits...

It would be interesting to find out which way INTJs lean mostly
1) Close friendship a requirement for sex
2) Close friendship NOT a requirement for sex

My guess is #1... at least relative to other types... it would fit the 'reserved' personality

I was really hoping to get statistics to back up this sort of claim, but since some people who I'll leave unnamed got huffy about the nature of the question and did an anonymous poll which I can't really draw nearly as firm statistics from, the whole thing has gone awry. This is what I thought would happen.

[Harmony]

I make a distinction between friends and acquaintances though. If you don't hang out with them ever, then they're the later. If you do, at least once in a while, they're the former. Close friends, much more often and you share more with them.

LoL, that still fits my category for friends in double digits versus close friends. I have acquaintances (mostly people I work with or used to go to high school with) and then my friends I hang out with, and then my friends I confide in. =P

[Firebrand]

Ladies and gentlemen,

I think you may be missing the point of my post. I'm really of the opinion that the number alone doesn't signify much outside of our life circumstances and perhaps sex drive, with a little bit of our personal choice thrown in for good measure. The only way it would be in any way relevant to me would be in a romantic partner, where I simply hope to be with a similarly minded person.

I find the line of questioning and the intensity with which it is pursued strengthening my resolve to remain publicly mysterious, simply for the heck of it. I do find it very interesting that my stand on the subject makes you assume that it's high AND that I'm embarrassed...

If my sexual history is truly killing your curiosity, feel free to PM me and I may or may not tell you :p

We got the point of your post, it's just that rather than add to the thread, you instantly made an assumption of what it means and mocked the thread which, by it's very nature, implies that you were embarrassed.

For one, I was trying to validate theories with real data (barring the possibility of lies which most INTJ's probably would not sink to as they would not care what the numbers signified, so this may apply to you, but most people here are man or woman enough that they really don't care. We're not emotional by default). And for two, your sexual history falls into the category of gossip, and frankly, I can't speak for everyone here, but I really just don't care. I was looking for a simple number and an age. Not complicated. The internet in general is anonymous provided you don't give out your full name, address, email, SSN, etc. This should go without saying. Anyone here's profile is as anonymous as they decide it should be.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 15 seconds later...

LoL, that still fits my category for friends in double digits versus close friends. I have acquaintances (mostly people I work with or used to go to high school with) and then my friends I hang out with, and then my friends I confide in. =P
I used to think that way but I found out some people can suddenly become something other than a friend depending on the situation. Then I decided to be more clear-cut about it.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 11 minutes and 24 seconds later...

43 years old. Lots. Can't even guess within 10 or so.

Honestly didn't sleep around nearly as much when I was younger. I probably had a count before last year.

But rediscovering a lost sex drive at 42 has changed me in this way.

Wouldn't have done it without condoms though....
This really surprises me more than the statistics of the poll. People really can't remember? Seriously?!? Sex would have to be incredibly casual for this to be true. I'm more reserved giving out my email or phone number than that.. So, obviously, more than 19. Good enough for statistics. The last line is TMI, just in case you were wondering...





Firebrand9 added to this post, 17 minutes and 46 seconds later...

Then let me point out the flaw in your reasoning too. Most INTJs didn't post in this thread so perhaps most do think the information is too personal. You are making assumptions. Most INTJs I've come across are very private and posting about their sexual history on a public forum would be too personal for them.

Number and age are different than history... I didn't ask for the blow by blow (pun not even intended). If someone takes it personally, then that is their problem. If it's too personal, then they don't post to it. Where am I missing anyone on this? And there's many INTJ's that share information about themselves here without feeling exposed, thanks in large part, to the anonymity that creating a profile and putting as much information as you care to provide, not that you are required to, which is exactly why I did not ask for the details (gossip). Nor would I care to know. Just the numbers to draw a theory on are plenty.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 6 minutes and 19 seconds later...

a) What she said ^^ which goes in line with implying that no information is too personal, which is clearly the place where you and I disagree.

Then don't post. What's so hard?


Which is where you make assumptions.

What assumptions? Is there something in that that struck a nerve?




the words "self-centered" come to mind....
do consider that when other people post, they talk about their views on the subject related to the OP or other posts. Your view is not universal, it is merely your opinion, you seem to treat it as gospel.

No, in general, he is right. I was deliberate in not asking for details. I don't even want to know. And, everyone is self-centered. Everyone acts in their own behalf. Case in point. First, the defense was "I could lie", then "too personal", and now "not wanting to be called into question" which is exactly what INTJs do. Get used to it.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 2 minutes and 47 seconds later...

I'm 29 and I've violated over 900 women, most of whom had hearts that beat.

Most? hahaha So am I to assume you work in a mortuary, graveyard, or morgue?

[Harmony]

As far as people not remembering... You have to consider what was done leading up to sex. There are people out there that have gotten so trashed or doped up that they don't remember a thing... Or... They were drugged. Unfortunately there are people out there that will drug a person just for sex.

[Sesquipedalian]

Sex is not and cannot be casual to me.

I'm a virgin by choice, not due to circumstance or profound unattractiveness, but by principle. I believe sex transcends the physical and connects two people spiritually in a way that cannot ever totally be undone.

It's something I look forward to discovering and enjoying with my future wife.

[Firebrand]

As far as people not remembering... You have to consider what was done leading up to sex. There are people out there that have gotten so trashed or doped up that they don't remember a thing... Or... They were drugged. Unfortunately there are people out there that will drug a person just for sex.

Yeah, ok. Drugs or alcohol impair memory. Fair enough. But every time? And if you're fuzzy on it, but think something may've happened, doesn't that imply something to you?

[Synamon]

My theory is that women, in general seem to have more partners than men. (Which is why I asked straight-out instead of a poll. The poll's statistics are not nearly as easy to draw from and really pretty much violated the formation of the theory.) There's a lot of reasons I think for this, but in most of the women I know and have talked to, this has been true. INTJ's tend to be different birds and less prone to falling in with the crowd, so I wanted to see if this still held true or was different when it comes to INTJ's. So now that you know (and this reply is late as I'm on here maybe once a week), what do you think?

I think your uninformed theory is crap. You should take a look at the actual statistics that nacht was helpful enough to supply here (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.).

I see that you put one. Ok, that was my mistake. Must've been reading too fast. No irony, I want statistics. I don't want details beyond the number. And, I asked how many partners you had, not how many times you've had sex. So your backlash is unnecessary. Read the original topic.
I have no implications for married people. Don't put words in my mouth.

You quoted my post. So yes, it was your mistake.

From the posts you've just made it's clear you have some sort of bias against women. I have no idea why you feel the need to judge people, but I'm done with this thread.

[BostonIan]

My theory is that women, in general seem to have more partners than men. (Which is why I asked straight-out instead of a poll. The poll's statistics are not nearly as easy to draw from and really pretty much violated the formation of the theory.) There's a lot of reasons I think for this, but in most of the women I know and have talked to, this has been true. INTJ's tend to be different birds and less prone to falling in with the crowd, so I wanted to see if this still held true or was different when it comes to INTJ's. So now that you know (and this reply is late as I'm on here maybe once a week), what do you think?

Every time a male and a female sleep together, exactly one tally goes into the "female column", one tally goes into the "male column". From heterosexual relationships, the average number of sex partners can only be exactly equal.

Think of an excel grid where women are listen horizontally, menn are listed vertically, every time a couple mates, a tally goes into the appropriate box:

Abby Beth Cathy Dana Elen Fay Gina Haley Ira Jane Sum
Al 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 2
Bo 0 0 1 0 1 0 1 1 0 1 5
Cory 0 1 1 0 1 1 0 1 0 1 6
Dave 1 1 1 1 1 0 1 1 0 0 7
Eric 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0 1 3
Frank 0 1 1 1 1 0 0 1 1 0 6
Greg 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 2
Harry 1 0 1 0 1 0 1 0 0 0 4
Ian 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Joe 0 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 1 4
=
Sum 3 4 5 2 9 1 3 5 3 4 = 39

The totals of each are 39. The male matrix is the same cube as the female matrix. The differences in reports could only come from homosexuals, lying, and an imbalance between the number of men and women.

Homosexuals: I assume homosexual men have more lovers than homosexual women.
Lying: I also assume than men are more likely to exaggerate their number, woman are more likely to minimize.
Population imbalance: the total number of sexual partners will always be equal, but the average will change based on the gender proportions. The larger population divides the total by a larger number, so the average is smaller. The smaller population will have the larger average.

[nacht]

My theory is that women, in general seem to have more partners than men. (Which is why I asked straight-out instead of a poll. The poll's statistics are not nearly as easy to draw from and really pretty much violated the formation of the theory.) There's a lot of reasons I think for this, but in most of the women I know and have talked to, this has been true. INTJ's tend to be different birds and less prone to falling in with the crowd, so I wanted to see if this still held true or was different when it comes to INTJ's. So now that you know (and this reply is late as I'm on here maybe once a week), what do you think?


The sample group of "the people I have talked to" will get you every time.

I'll throw more numbers (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.) out of the CDCs results.

Median number of lifetime partners is 7 for men and 4 for women, 29% of men and 9% of women say they've had 15+ partners. 17% of men and 10% of women claimed to having 2 or more sex partners in the last year. 25% of women and 17% of men report only ever having one partner. Unfortunately it doesn't give us the nice breakdowns by age that the CDC's numbers give us.

The CDCs numbers are even more telling and complete, however. Be sure to check table 10 (page 28), which indicates the median number for 25---29 year olds is 5.9 for men and 3.5 for women. Among 20---24 year olds it is 3.8 for men and 2.8 for women. Over the entire sample (15---44) it is 5.4 for men and 3.3 for women.

[Firebrand]

Every time a male and a female sleep together, exactly one tally goes into the "female column", one tally goes into the "male column". From heterosexual relationships, the average number of sex partners can only be exactly equal.
Right, I know what you're saying, but if the tallies are consistently being generated by the same people, then their number will be higher than someone who is not having sex with as many people. So IE - Some people play the field more than others, and they may be playing the field with someone who doesn't.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 0 minutes and 55 seconds later...

I think your uninformed theory is crap. You should take a look at the actual statistics that nacht was helpful enough to supply here (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.).


You quoted my post. So yes, it was your mistake.

From the posts you've just made it's clear you have some sort of bias against women. I have no idea why you feel the need to judge people, but I'm done with this thread.
Bye!

[nacht]

Population imbalance: the total number of sexual partners will always be equal, but the average will change based on the gender proportions. The larger population divides the total by a larger number, so the average is smaller. The smaller population will have the larger average.

Your numbers are true of averages given certain assumptions, but not medians which form a more reliable statistic anyways.

I'd also note that your model assumes a static population, and can get thrown off by people dying.

[Autoptic]

Sure man! Didn't you ever hear of scissoring?

Didn't you ever hear of tribadism?

[Firebrand]

The sample group of "the people I have talked to" will get you every time.

I'll throw more numbers (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.) on top of the CDCs results.

Median number of lifetime partners is 7 for men and 4 for women, 29% of men and 9% of women say they've had 15+ partners. 17% of men and 10% of women claimed to having 2 or more sex partners in the last year. 25% of women and 17% of men report only ever having one partner. Unfortunately it doesn't give us the nice breakdowns by age that the CDC's numbers give us.

The CDCs numbers are even more telling and complete, however. Be sure to check table 10 (page 28), which indicates the median number for 25---29 year olds is 5.9 for men and 3.5 for women. Among 20---24 year olds it is 3.8 for men and 2.8 for women. Over the entire sample (15---44) it is 5.4 for men and 3.3 for women.

I know that the people I have talked to are not a demographic, but it's obvious in most of my friends, both male and female, who are either married or in long-term relationships, that it has usually (but I will say not always) been the woman who has placed higher importance on sex. I was only trying to find out if this is typical. This thought occurred to me when my friend's wife and her friend insisted that we go to a sex shop after dinner, and from stories from a few women I know personally and then weighing them against what my guy friends have told me (a few are players, many are not).

The CDC statistics are already 7 years old. Times have changed and I don't think having a lot of sexual partners is unsafe territory for either gender. But I wanted to confirm, to whatever degree I could.

As Synomyn has already tried and convicted me of being a misogynist, I don't care to try to convince her.

Here's a few links that state this that I have just searched for :
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 0 minutes and 54 seconds later...

Didn't you ever hear of tribadism?

ha! Not before now...

[firetiger]

I'm 22

Started when I was 18

7 partners.. men and women.

[JINT]

I'm 27
Lost virginity at age 19. And when I turned 20, I had two bf(it was fun for fooling them back. They've never knew I caught them,lol.) and broke with them on same month and year.

[nacht]

I know that the people I have talked to are not a demographic, but it's obvious in most of my friends, both male and female, who are either married or in long-term relationships, that it has usually (but I will say not always) been the woman who has placed higher importance on sex.


Higher importance != more sexual partners and your friends are so highly biased in group as to not be meaningful.


The CDC statistics are already 7 years old. Times have changed and I don't think having a lot of sexual partners is unsafe territory for either gender. But I wanted to confirm, to whatever degree I could.


Times have not changed significantly enough in the last 7 years to warrant a swing. Swings of this nature happen over generations, not 7 years.


Here's a few links that state this that I have just searched for :
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The first of those is specific to the UK and won't apply to any demographic outside of that group, it also strictly applies to women in their lower twenties. I also know nothing about the methodology used in that study, but color me suspicious of a study conducted by MORE magazine: "Style, Health, and Sex & Dating Advice for Women Over 40."

The second one talks about the average number, which is borderline useless due to outliers, lying, etc. In fact, the entire article is about psychological influences in people not being 100% accurate. The CDC study, which does use medians and was extremely well controlled as these things goes, is the most accurate and comprehensive study to date.

The third one is about the same thing and also uses the arithmetic mean, which is again a useless measure for this sort of thing.

[Lycurgus]

I'm 18 and I've had sex with 1 person.

[Firebrand]

Higher importance != more sexual partners and your friends are so highly biased in group as to not be meaningful.

But as I also stated, from stories. And what makes groups of friends biased in this way? My friends represent human beings same as your friends.

Times have not changed significantly enough in the last 7 years to warrant a swing. Swings of this nature happen over generations, not 7 years.

And among many women I know that are of a younger generation, they may throw these statistics and may feel embarrassed to give out accurate numbers anonymously, same as what happened here.



The first of those is specific to the UK and won't apply to any demographic outside of that group, it also strictly applies to women in their lower twenties. I also know nothing about the methodology used in that study, but color me suspicious of a study conducted by MORE magazine: "Style, Health, and Sex & Dating Advice for Women Over 40."

The second one talks about the average number, which is borderline useless due to outliers, lying, etc. In fact, the entire article is about psychological influences in people not being 100% accurate. The CDC study, which does use medians and was extremely well controlled as these things goes, is the most accurate and comprehensive study to date.

Ok, while I agree that the statistics from CDC are quite good and exhaustive, there's still a few sticking points with it. For one, we don't know where in the country those statistics were taken from. If they came from bible-belt areas, then the statistics could be skewed by the values and stigma on sex that exist there vs cities or more heavily populated areas. Secondly, they say pretty clearly that the wording of questions may specifically elicit more "yes" responses to questions than "nos". Third, they also say they use weighted data but we are left guessing to how that data is weighted and for what reason. And lastly, as the one article says in relation to the psychology associated with this topic (which was demonstrated in part here as well with some people being touchier about the initial question) that many men tend to inflate the number and many women downplay it.

[firebee]

But as I also stated, from stories. And what makes groups of friends biased in this way? My friends represent human beings same as your friends.

The people who are friends with you are a) entirely representative of the population of the country as a whole, and b) large enough to draw significant conclusions from? That strikes me as a wee bit unusual...


And among many women I know that are of a younger generation, they may throw these statistics and may feel embarrassed to give out accurate numbers anonymously, same as what happened here.

So they're more likely to accurately represent their sexual history in fish stories told over beers?

But seriously, BostonIan has a good point. Are you asserting that women are divided into groups of n_partner = 0 and n_partner = the entire NFL, and that men are not similarly distributed? Or is it something else?

[nacht]

But as I also stated, from stories. And what makes groups of friends biased in this way? My friends represent human beings same as your friends.


Two words, burn them into your understanding:

Selection bias (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)

You are trying to make generalizations from a small group of people who you know.

First of all, the people you know are not a random sample from society. They aren't even a haphazard sample. I went to an engineering school: the people there are very much "human beings", but I would struggle to say that they represented anything in particular. My group of friends there was in no way reflective of the general population of the school, and the people in the school were not representative of the area, and the area was not representative of the US.


Ok, while I agree that the statistics from CDC are quite good and exhaustive, there's still a few sticking points with it. For one, we don't know where in the country those statistics were taken from. If they came from bible-belt areas, then the statistics could be skewed by the values and stigma on sex that exist there vs cities or more heavily populated areas.


Those of us who read the study do.

From the report: "The 2002 NSFG was conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC) National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS) and is based on in-person, face-to-face interviews with a national sample of 12,571 males and females in the household population of the United States."

They go on to say that:

"""All estimates in this report are
based on sampling weights that are
designed to produce unbiased estimates
for the U.S. population. """



Secondly, they say pretty clearly that the wording of questions may specifically elicit more "yes" responses to questions than "nos".


Only on extremely specific questions involving same-sex contact among women.


Third, they also say they use weighted data but we are left guessing to how that data is weighted and for what reason.

Um, weighting for statistical control is a standard practice when conducting polls and it does say how it was weighted: "sampling weights that are
designed to produce unbiased estimates for the U.S. population," i.e., demographically, probably based off of estimates derived from the 2000 census. This is done in order to provide an accurate model of the US population and is perfectly standard when conducting scientific polls.



And lastly, as the one article says in relation to the psychology associated with this topic (which was demonstrated in part here as well with some people being touchier about the initial question) that many men tend to inflate the number and many women downplay it.

It also states that they count differently, but the ranges in the CDC study are such that it would help control for this substantially. They also use the median, which is more resistant to errors and outliers.

[Kisai]

Didn't you ever hear of tribadism?

I've heard of scissoring (and had to look up its synonym: tribadism) certainly.

But I don't know anyone who actually does it. Granted I'm not privy to the sex lives of most lesbians.

Now, I know porn is not indicative of people's actual sex lives, but in all the porn I've seen in my life, I've seen scissoring performed only once. Then there was that South Park episode with Mrs. Garrison, where it was played for laughs.


It seems like it would feel good in a 'rubbing against a pillow' feels good, but if you have a partner with you, there's so many other things you could do.

Ladies, your feedback?

[Harmony]

Yeah, ok. Drugs or alcohol impair memory. Fair enough. But every time? And if you're fuzzy on it, but think something may've happened, doesn't that imply something to you?

For the record, I've never touched drugs in my life (aside from alcohol). I've never been drunk enough to not stop someone. I just happen to know people that have.

You see, some of us have the ability to see things from all angles. We can see the girl that turns to drugs to get her fix and then doesn't remember what she did that night. We can see the guy that drank himself into a drunken stupor and took home the bar whore.

Do I think it's right that someone fries their brain to the point they don't remember anything, no I don't. But if that's the way that person wants to live their life, there is nothing anyone can say or do until that person is ready to change.

Have you ever seen a person who is hooked on drugs? Not just someone who does them, I mean hooked. It is highly possible that they do not remember what they do day to day....

[Merle]

I'm 27,
Have slept with 10 people
Lost my virginity at 17
4 out of the 10 were/are long term relationships
2 were more than a one time thing but not proper relationships
and the other 4 were one night stands, but with people I already knew.

[Firebrand]

The people who are friends with you are a) entirely representative of the population of the country as a whole, and b) large enough to draw significant conclusions from? That strikes me as a wee bit unusual...


So they're more likely to accurately represent their sexual history in fish stories told over beers?

But seriously, BostonIan has a good point. Are you asserting that women are divided into groups of n_partner = 0 and n_partner = the entire NFL, and that men are not similarly distributed? Or is it something else?

(Ok, I'll do my best to answer this but I'm typing on a Mac as my PC crashed this past week and I'd just about rather rub rock salt in my eyes than type anything lengthy on a Mac.)

Agreed. And I'm hypothesizing from people I know personally, trends I see in society, other people I know as acquaintances. I just don't think that the way the questions were given in the CDC survey were geared to get 100% accurate results. Let me give an example. I recall once when I first went to collage, there was a similar survey for drugs that was even more open-ended in the answers and objective in the questions than the approach the CDC took. I remember a guy sitting next to me, who I flat out knew was a drug-head, saying something to the effect "I'm not giving honest answers for these". Later I asked one of my friends I ran into who was a stoner type and I asked him if he answered that honestly. He and his roommate both said emphatically "yes!" and that they didn't care who knew. My point, is that these surveys don't always get honest answers. The reason I asked here, was not to beat any gender over the head, it was to allow the scale to tip any way it can, and INTJ's are usually pretty uncaring of the implications of the statistics. I figure the numbers said here would be more honest than the one from the CDC. I wasn't looking for broad-based statistics of the entire population. I wanted a predominantly Introvert perspective.

What I'm trying to prove and simultaneously disprove for myself is difficult to put succinctly to words. There's a number of facets and I may not be able to accurately portray them all here, now. While it's been idiotically said that I'm out to call women sluts, I say that is not my intention at all. I can not overstate this point enough. One aspect I'm investigating for myself, is that people seem to be more conservative with their sexuality, or they just let go of that completely. INTJ's tend to be conservative. Key word, tend.

I think the men are probably evenly distributed among all types, but among INTJ's, men seem to be at a disadvantage in hooking up with large numbers of women. I've seen this again and again discussed on this forum, including the apparent need to resort to "Pick-Up Artist"-type material in order to combat this. Since guys are usually expected in society to be the hunter type, Introvert guys seem to be at a greater disadvantage than women who are Introverts. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions or that this is absolute, just to be clear. I think also, that women tend to control sexual encounters and INTJ women are probably able to get sex more easily (should they want it) or keep the guy in check (if they don't for whatever reason) due to the mastermind tendency in INTJ's.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 31 minutes and 35 seconds later...

Two words, burn them into your understanding:

Selection bias (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)

You are trying to make generalizations from a small group of people who you know.

First of all, the people you know are not a random sample from society. They aren't even a haphazard sample. I went to an engineering school: the people there are very much "human beings", but I would struggle to say that they represented anything in particular. My group of friends there was in no way reflective of the general population of the school, and the people in the school were not representative of the area, and the area was not representative of the US.



Those of us who read the study do.

From the report: "The 2002 NSFG was conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC) National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS) and is based on in-person, face-to-face interviews with a national sample of 12,571 males and females in the household population of the United States."

They go on to say that:

"""All estimates in this report are
based on sampling weights that are
designed to produce unbiased estimates
for the U.S. population. """

So, chances are, they were put through a computer program to calculate the stats. Nacht, have you ever met any programmers from state organizations? Let me be the first to say that a. they are not of the highest calibur or they'd be making far more money elsewhere and b. their coding methods and solutions don't work at all or correctly a good portion of the time. I don't know what methods they used to produce supposedly unbiased samples so I am highly skeptical of their methods to remain correctly unbiased.

But, besides, I didn't necessarily want stats from the whole country, even if they are accurate. I still have other theories forming from this thread and various answers and reactions from it.


Only on extremely specific questions involving same-sex contact among women.



Um, weighting for statistical control is a standard practice when conducting polls and it does say how it was weighted: "sampling weights that are
designed to produce unbiased estimates for the U.S. population," i.e., demographically, probably based off of estimates derived from the 2000 census. This is done in order to provide an accurate model of the US population and is perfectly standard when conducting scientific polls.



Ok, but again. You're talking to a programmer. How? How are they weighted? What aspects constitute higher or lower weights? You just quoted the sample itself. If the sample ended up being inaccurate due to an improper discrepancy in weighting. I could throw a bunch of numbers down on a piece of paper and snaz it all up to make it look professional, and say the results are unbiased based on weights, and many would probably believe it, but the more technical will question how.


It also states that they count differently, but the ranges in the CDC study are such that it would help control for this substantially. They also use the median, which is more resistant to errors and outliers.

It may be good but IMO they would need to do a much larger sampling and show how they arrived at the numbers for me to swallow it hook, line, and sinker without gagging.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 5 minutes and 17 seconds later...

For the record, I've never touched drugs in my life (aside from alcohol). I've never been drunk enough to not stop someone. I just happen to know people that have.

You see, some of us have the ability to see things from all angles. We can see the girl that turns to drugs to get her fix and then doesn't remember what she did that night. We can see the guy that drank himself into a drunken stupor and took home the bar whore.

Do I think it's right that someone fries their brain to the point they don't remember anything, no I don't. But if that's the way that person wants to live their life, there is nothing anyone can say or do until that person is ready to change.

Have you ever seen a person who is hooked on drugs? Not just someone who does them, I mean hooked. It is highly possible that they do not remember what they do day to day....

No, no Kym. :) What I meant was not to do with drugs specifically. What I meant was that if you thought something had happened due to drugs or whatever, then doesn't that mean that you probably did have sex or at least did something sexual. And I can see things from many different angles but once I come to a conclusion on the available evidence, it will take a lot of good factual evidence to shake that. The J vs the P aspect.

[nacht]

It may be good but IMO they would need to do a much larger sampling and show how they arrived at the numbers for me to swallow it hook, line, and sinker without gagging.


Your sense of statistics is poor young padowan.

Law of Large Numbers (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)

Central Limit Theorem (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)


If I take a large enough random sample of a population, I can determine the properties of the population that it comes from.

The definition of "large enough" varies, but is calculated based on the degree of power ([url=To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.) that I want in my study, the size the effect, and the amount of variance in the system.

Your examination of your friends might indicate that in an isolated subgroup there is a tendency for women to be more open about sex than the men in that same subgroup. Great, how does that extend to anything outside of the people that you are directly asking?





Ok, but again. You're talking to a programmer. How? How are they weighted? What aspects constitute higher or lower weights? You just quoted the sample itself. If the sample ended up being inaccurate due to an improper discrepancy in weighting. I could throw a bunch of numbers down on a piece of paper and snaz it all up to make it look professional, and say the results are unbiased based on weights, and many would probably believe it, but the more technical will question how.


I am a software engineer by trade :p

"How" is the same way that all studies are weighted when they are weighted demographically.

Let's say that I know that the population has a 12% population of blacks, but my sample comes back with 8%. For whatever reason--bad luck, time of day, cell phones, call backs, not answering the phone, whatever--I have underrepresented blacks in my sample compared to the general population.

So, I weight my data: I basically say that everyone who is black has their vote count for 1.5 votes (this is the simplistic version--we can get more complex). I have effectively removed my bias from under-representing blacks from my study.

This does make several key assumptions, the major one being that our 8% is representative of the broader 12% and that there were no systematic (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.) (read as: biasing) errors that lead to us getting an 8% instead of a 12%.

It also depends on good demographic data (this was a plague during the election cycle: do we weight by party and, if so, with what numbers?), but as far as this kind of study is concerned the census provides excellent demographic data.

See also: Survey Weights (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(statistics)#Survey_weights)

That's the basic version.


But, besides, I didn't necessarily want stats from the whole country, even if they are accurate. I still have other theories forming from this thread and various answers and reactions from it.



From what I can tell, you want inaccurate statistics that aren't from the whole country, and believe these to be more meaningful than accurate statistics from the whole country. Am I right?

[firebee]

I recall once when I first went to collage, there was a similar survey for drugs that was even more open-ended in the answers and objective in the questions than the approach the CDC took.


I took a similar survey in high school, concerning access to the required elements of a perfect party (i.e. alcohol, tobacco, firearms, and explosives). I answered "yes" to all the questions because I ticked off all the things I could get ahold of, and then asked my adventurous friend whether he could get items E...Z. Entirely honest, almost totally useless. When I saw the headlines about it later, I was greatly amused.


The reason I asked here, was not to beat any gender over the head, it was to allow the scale to tip any way it can, and INTJ's are usually pretty uncaring of the implications of the statistics. I figure the numbers said here would be more honest than the one from the CDC. I wasn't looking for broad-based statistics of the entire population. I wanted a predominantly Introvert perspective.


It's not about beating any gender over the head. I've no doubt that your intentions are to find what's in the data. What I question is just whether your methods are going to tell you anything useful. I'm not a statistician, but I am a researcher, and I've seen it happen time and time again where I think I see a useful correlation but by the time I account for the caveats in the data I find that I've discovered that rocks fall when you drop them.

You can certainly gather more anecdotes using this thread, and thereby learn, but the poll is a mere curiosity and the posts constitute a handful of data points of putative type / age / gender / n_partners. As a source of quantitative information, it tells you almost nothing.


One aspect I'm investigating for myself, is that people seem to be more conservative with their sexuality, or they just let go of that completely.


I've observed a few times (and I think some of them were here) that I think I see something similar, but I'm not sure whether it's meaningful or not. Or how to tell, for that matter. What I seem to see is a cluster of people within certain communities who take a strongly-NT approach to their kink du jour. Of course, I see this because I'm a NT myself. Likewise, I also notice on this forum a division between people who have a relatively static conservative view of love and marriage (horse and carriage...), and people who seem to have turned their analytical skills to the question and come up with a rational framework that is often quite different from prevailing attitudes. But again, it's exceedingly difficult to parse out the influence from my perspective.


I think the men are probably evenly distributed among all types, but among INTJ's, men seem to be at a disadvantage in hooking up with large numbers of women...


It sounds like part of what you're looking for is a comparison between men and women, but you don't necessarily know who is which here. T'ain't a forum exclusively of INTJ men. ;P

[Autoptic]

I'm 27,
Have slept with 10 people
Lost my virginity at 17
4 out of the 10 were/are long term relationships
2 were more than a one time thing but not proper relationships
and the other 4 were one night stands, but with people I already knew.

It occurs to me to ask what it considered long term. I was thinking years, but this'd be 10 years. Even if that was just divided among the 4, that'd only be 2.5 years. How long is short term?:uneasy:

[Merle]

It occurs to me to ask what it considered long term. I was thinking years, but this'd be 10 years. Even if that was just divided among the 4, that'd only be 2.5 years. How long is short term?:uneasy:

a short term relationship would be between about 2-6 months.. I would consider my relationships that lasted between 1 and a bit and 3 years to be long-term, they were a long-time especially when looked at in comparison to my age at the time... and also the 'feel' of the relationships, the idea of them was that they would last even longer...

[imNormal]

Male
Age: 50
Total Partners: 1

I knew what I wanted, waited till I found her, then married her almost 27 years ago. She was (is) definitely worth waiting for. We're still in love and continue to go on regular dates. Life is Very good!

[Nomadofthehills]

For the record, I've never touched drugs in my life (aside from alcohol). I've never been drunk enough to not stop someone. I just happen to know people that have.

I don't know why people make the distinction between drugs and alcohol. To me it says, "I've never done any illegal drugs, because I'm a good girl and I only poison my brain and body in legal ways!"

*Smile and put hand on shoulder* (I think this is the social convention usually used to indicate merely poking fun at someone?)

[OneHertz]

20, male. Lost virginity 3 months ago to somebody I loved. She left me a month after that so I decided to have some fun and get over her. Have had 2-5 different partners since (won't post exact # as some real life acquaintances read this thread). I'll do a few more in the next 4 months and be done it for a while.

[HeyZeus]

Great job warlord/devil-guy with this thread. Lots of great honest or defensive and judgmental content here. 37 yrs. Voted 19+. I thought a more specific number might compromise some of the empirical value of your stats (ingenious how you naively sold this "hypothesis" gimmick to mine this great personal info. I'll be watching for you man.

Completely non-judgmental myself on how y'all arrived at your number. You have your own philosophy as it should be. Double digits just means lots of amusing memories autoptic...I don't party w/ Marilyn Manson, though it's an intriguing fantasy.

Casual is OK, "going with" sex is good, dating sex is nice, relationship sex is appealing. I don't see anything dirty about it. Hey, if you let your proficiency slip, you could disappoint the one you want to impress. It's not the same as practicing with your pillows. But if your philosophy is no sex without a committed relationship, that's cool too. Wow...what a great read. Way to go diablo-guy.

[azzurro]

I think INTJ girls are going to have way more sex partners than INTJ guys for one simple reason -opportunity. Think about the scenario for a mildly attractive guy vs. a mildly attractive girl.

The attractive girl on a typical night out is going to be approached many times by guys 4,,5,6,10 times, etc. It's a typical rule of evolution the male seeks and sexually peruses the female and the more attractive you are the more in demand you will be (regardless of your personality type). Depending on the INTJ girl's rational thinking on that night..... sex with this guy might make perfect sense because she's getting over a relationship, in a new place, making her boyfriend jealous, etc.

The mildly attractive guy isn't going to have a sexual partner unless he's the aggressor and to many (not all) INTJ's it has to perfectly fit in with his master plan. Couple that with the fact that the I in INTJ makes him less socially skilled in pursuing, charming, and escalating and it comes down to one simple reason-
The attractive INTJ girl has more opportunities to have sex than an INTJ guy because they are viewed as attractive while the attractive INTJ guy is viewed as unattractive because he doesn't know how to create sexual tension which makes the courting and escalating concept seem awkward. Factor in that the male and female mind are triggered sexually by different emotional and physical cues and in this society I see INTJ girls having more partners than INTJ guys

[lethologica]

I lost it very young, indeed. Especially for an introvert.

Haha, I love how most of the voters are virgins, and then a big chunk of the rest had 19+

[smabers]

I'm 27 and have had 15 different sex partners. The last girl I was with told me she had 18 different partners and I was secretly disgusted by it. I guess it's not something you should talk about once you get past a certain number.

[LPM]

More than I should have.

Of all the girls I've talked to that have shared their number with me, 110 was the highest I've heard. Honestly I was turned on by it. But no we didn't get together. You'd have to double up to go near that.

[Pcell]

25.

I've been with 4 people, some rather constantly.

[LPM]

28.





nacht added to this post, 2 minutes and 0 seconds later...



I don't think that's the case.

If we were to take this poll at its current level as a random sample of INTJs at-large (hahahaha) we would find the median to be... 1.

The median for lifetime sexual partners among 15--44 year olds is closer to 5 (varying by gender).

What we see here is at least roughly the distribution I would expect with a lot of virgins (younger populations on forums will tend to have a higher level of those), a long tail, and a sharp uptick at the end for those who have had "lots."


btw, it's not a sharp uptick. It's only that way because 20+ is all lumped together. Sorry I'm a stats guy. A comment like that is worse than a bad grammar mistake for me.

[paleoeco]

I'm 35, and I stopped counting sexual partners once I hit triple digits (100+) and that was in my mid 20s. The good news is that I've considerably slowed down as I've aged and have only had 4 sexual partners during the last 5 years.

[ziggeee]

Lost virginity in a serious relationship just before my 20th birthday, still together 4 years later. So its only been 1. Virginity is special and I'm glad we both waited for eachother.

[Julie]

Sorry, this girl would just never tell! And I hold no judgement of anyone's number - high, low, or zero. Live and let love (physically)! Do what you feel and all that jazz.....

[pip]

Age: 30
Partners: 2
Frequency: 1 ea.

Thinking about this makes me unhappy :(

[pocohauntus]

Other than myself? None.

[AceBrown]

Age: 22

Partners: 9

Relationships: 2 (Both for one year each)

[Kenne936]

i'm 18. lost it in the past year. been with 3 since.
truth be told i actually expected it to be more profound

[Phoenix rising]

I heard comments about drunk INTJ's acting like ENTP's. I'm going to say I used to drink a lot and leave it at that.

[JimTaylor]

Age: 19
Partners: 0

[SelfMadeBum]

Wowza there's a lot of virgins here...

I'm 21 and I got zip...

[bdz]

How many people lost their virginity to someone they loved? I particularly wanted to AVOID doing that...it's awkward, clumsy, and I wanted to know what I was doing when I was with someone I loved. For those of who you did lose your virginity to someone you were in love with, do you separate sex from love?

[Nemesis]

Age: 26
I lost my V-card at the tender age of 13. During my teens and early early 20's I had quite a few partners (19+). Since I got back into school I've pretty much lived like a monk. Much like Rudy, I just don't have the time to commit to somebody and flings/one-night stands just don't do it for me anymore. However, I am currently seeing someone and it seems to be going well.

[johngaltrules]

22 and still I have my V card. The only thing annoying about is when people find out they ask if it is for religious reason. The answer is no.

[SevenOfSpades]

19, am a virgin. Like the above poster's case, not for religious reasons.

[sickchops]

0. had plenty of "near" situations, however, my morality got the better of me :laugh:

---------- Post added 10-09-2011 at 05:05 AM ----------

im also 18***

[Zebu Fellenz]

20 with a V-card here.

[sickchops]

18 0

[Purgatid]

I'm 30.

I've had sex with an unknown number of people. When I was in my teens, plus some years above 20, I had a new partner almost every other week. I went out a lot, and the relationships I had were short and and very intense. If I count low, and just count one new person per month, I'd still be looking at (between 15 and 22) about 70-80 different partners. It's likely more than that. I changed my ways somewhat after 22, and after that, sex has been limited to whom I'm currently involved with. Since 22, we're talking about perhaps 5-6 different partners, all girlfriends, some shorter relationships and some longer ones.

But I'm counting low, it's likely more than 100 in total. My disposition right now is that sex is exclusive. I don't have causal sex anymore, nor do I treat it as anything else as an expression of love and trust. My experience is that switching partners this often desensitises you. I remember vivdly that I felt empty having sex once I stopped switching partners. The first really long relationship I had after I stopped, we didn't sleep with one another during the first 6 months of the relationship. She thought there was something wrong with her, but there wasn't. I just couldn't do it. But slowly, I started wanting again. Now I function once more, but I don't recommend anyone to treat sex that casually, though I recognize that others might not end up as empty as I did - the risk is there, and that risk is enough for me to advice against it.

As for the number of times - I just can't say. Most of those partners were one nighters, while I've had an active sex life with every partner I've had after that. I don't know the frequency of sex though, it's different for each relationship, each month, each week. Sometimes I go into a horny state that lasts for months which means I have lots of sex. Other times I go into an eunuck state, which means I just don't want to for weeks. And any other frequency in between.

[AureliaSeverina]

4.


edit: I’ve started a separate thread about this question now. Please post your replies there.A question for those of you who have had sex with lots of partners:
I’m curious as to how you got to know all those people. Aside from the fact that I’m married, I never even get into situations where I could have sex with someone (other than my husband). The number of people I know is limited anyway, and out of this number, the subset of people I find reasonably attractive is even smaller. I do fancy random people now and then, but even if I were inclined to have sex with them, things would never develop to a point where it would be possible. As for people I don’t know, I don’t get into situations where I could have one-night stands (parties, being drunk, being stoned etc). I’ve always been like this, even as a teenager.
I’m just curious, how do you as fellow introverts even spend significant amounts of time on the type of social situations that are likely to get you laid?

[VF1J]

OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAANNNNDD!


For real.

[nb35819]

I'm 19 and male just 2 partners..........to have sex with someone I have to connect with them........and for them to connect with me they have to break through A LOT of emotional barriers because I don't understand my emotions in the first place. ANy other INTJ feel like that?

---------- Post added 10-09-2011 at 01:19 PM ----------

4.

A question for those of you who have had sex with lots of partners:
I’m curious as to how you got to know all those people. Aside from the fact that I’m married, I never even get into situations where I could have sex with someone (other than my husband). The number of people I know is limited anyway, and out of this number, the subset of people I find reasonably attractive is even smaller. I do fancy random people now and then, but even if I were inclined to have sex with them, things would never develop to a point where it would be possible. As for people I don’t know, I don’t get into situations where I could have one-night stands (parties, being drunk, being stoned etc). I’ve always been like this, even as a teenager.
I’m just curious, how do you as fellow introverts even spend significant amounts of time on the type of social situations that are likely to get you laid?
Well first off my friends usually drag me to parties....my best friend pretty much outright begs me to go with him. We usually drink or smoke weed. I have been in plenty of situations where I could definitely have sex with a girl at a party.......but to me being sexual with someone is a deep showing of emotion.......and I can't just bring myself to give my emotions to random drunk people.....I just can't. I know that might be weird because I'm a guy and all but it just is to me......on the other hand if you wan't to have random sex with random people go do it.....I mean it is fun and all.

[Munglik]

0

I'm 18 and I don't really care. I would only want sex with a partner and probably only when she would want to. Maybe I'm missing out on something great, maybe not. I guess I'm more the cuddly type.

[JC22]

Zero baby, and proud of it.

I am pretty grateful today that I didn't go through with any of those 'close calls'. Good thing that I am easily disgusted and turned off by the wrong things girls do/say.

(Age: 20-ish)

[Purgatid]

I’m curious as to how you got to know all those people.

I didn't. It's not requiered to know someone to have sex with them. Well it is NOW but wasn't for me back then. Where? Clubs, bars, private partys, friends of friends, co-workers. I didn't really limit myself to any specific place or people. If it was breathing, I was going to try and hide my dick in it.

I’m just curious, how do you as fellow introverts even spend significant amounts of time on the type of social situations that are likely to get you laid?

Peer pressure. I don't naturally seek out such situations, but if the social context is that you're supposed to be a party animal, and if a friend suggests going out - then you're going out. At least, that's what it used to be for me. If someone I know suggests to me that we go out now, I reply "lol no. Gtfo."

[catzmeow]

I don't really know my exact number...during college, a lot. After college, very few. I learned that casual sex was, for me, not a good plan. I get emotionally attached. I don't really regret my past, I learned a lot. I'm completely committed to sexual fidelity and was during my marriage. It's a shame that my ex-husband, who frankly slept with a lot fewer people than I did before marriage, wasn't more committed to fidelity.

[Jalex]

Early 30s and one....

[Eye on Earth]

I'm a male whore when it comes to sex. When I was in my early 20s I went months with someone in my bed. It was non-stop and usually not the same person two nights in a row. I learned what I liked and what I didn't like and I have no regrets.

Now, several years later, I can enjoy sex without any hang-ups. Now, I look for exactly what I want and usually find it.

*EoE is a shark*
*Swims, swims, swims, chomps*

It's so easy, it's almost not even a challenge anymore.

[Hawkeale]

Only one, it is not something I find very interesting.

[Eratosthenes]

Age 22, I've had 5 partners. Didn't lose my virginity until I was 20 though.

[Uriel]

Lost my virginity at 23.

[Onlyme]

You mean today?

[Nicole1975]

I'm in my 30's and I lost count.


Yeah, that's where I stand. I'm 35. I lost my virginity at 19 and had some wild times in my mid-20s-lotta orgies. I've been with over 100, I would guess, if not close to it. Though, it could be like 150-200 easily. I don't keep a list or anything.

[dontmesswithme]

1

I lost my virginity when I was 22.

[Nicole1975]

0. had plenty of "near" situations, however, my morality got the better of me :laugh:

---------- Post added 10-09-2011 at 05:05 AM ----------

im also 18***


NECRO posting!!

[Seraphim]

55 yoa. 1. Been together, marrried and dating, since 1974.

[Symphi]

0 for me, at age 19. A few reasons:
-Religious beliefs
-Personal safety and stress management (a.k.a. I want 0% chance of messing up my life right now, and the easiest course of action is to just avoid it.)

I had the chance numerous times with my ex... but I knew I'd get too attached and regret it (turns out I was right about my decision).
My current SO is understanding of my point of view on the subject, though that doesn't stop him from being touchy. ;)