Women and Sex

[SRVcardsfan27]

One of the topics that I think about a lot is the aforementioned women and sex. With guys, we are generally driven by it and most of us crave it (although I know many in here, including myself, aren't really like this). My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

My thoughts are possibly based on the fact that I'm a straight male and think of myself in terms of a sexual act with another man and to me that's disgusting.... However, I think the main problem is that in society, men are supposed to be the dominant type, and can manipulate many things. Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me. Not to mention the other acts that were once taboo in this society that men enjoy today.

I don't have this same problem when I think of having sons though, because the way I view society, I don't see them as the ones being violated.

Anyone care to share their thoughts? I'm specifically interested in viewing the females' responses, though men feel free to chime in as well.

[Kisai]

I want you to call up your parents and scream at them, because they have seriously messed with your head and its going to take you a decade to get it sorted out.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I doubt it was them. I've never really had any conversations regarding sex with them. Perhaps that was the point you were trying to make?

[Nikita]

I admit that one of the reasons I've chosen to wait until I find the right person is that I cannot imagine allowing someone who does not love and respect me inside of my body. I also don't entirely understand why a lot of men would choose to put themselves inside of random women because they really have no idea what's going on down there and what might be festering inside of her. The way I see it, anyone you enter or allow to enter you is forever connected to you in some way. I realize this might not be a shared point of view, but it does swim around my head on occasion.

[Kisai]

I'll let the girls speak. Seriously, from someone who was raised Catholic and had some sorting out to do, I wish you the best of luck.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I'll let the girls speak. Seriously, from someone who was raised Catholic and had some sorting out to do, I wish you the best of luck.

It's just something I think about; I don't obsess about it or anything, it's curiosity more than anything. I understand how society perceives sex and women and I know that women obviously enjoy it enough to do it, but it's something I still wonder about because I see it differently.

[Anona Miss]

I think you have solved your own problem. You'll never have that hypothetical daughter to worry about as long as you follow your own reasoning and never treat a woman disrespectfully.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I think you have solved your own problem. You'll never have that hypothetical daughter to worry about as long as you follow your own reasoning and never treat a woman disrespectfully.


How would my dealings with women have anything to do with what men may want to do to my potential daughter?

[rambling spider]

Women like sex. Really. We really do. Happy consensual sex is not a violation, not a disrespect.

I wish you the best in sorting yourself out.

[changos]

How would my dealings with women have anything to do with what men may want to do to my potential daughter?
In many ways, on a normal family (complete and together) the attitude of the father deeply affects the way the girl will relate to guys. Even as it depends of the presences-absence of both parents (not only physically) bot their influence in their education, many books I've read and opinions of psychologist converge, into how the father affects this relationship.

As for your initial line, remember, your daughter will see how you treat women(wife) and its very likely she might think everything is good and noble if you are so with your wife, unless you (or her) explain to her that not everybody that treats her kind loves her, in fact, many just want to get in her pants.

I don't want to get into a discussion.... but if one don't take a healthy position towards the daughter (male - female) they can grow seeking a father figure, confusing sex with love, or naive enough to think that everyone is noble and good.

As simple as this: if you tell her X is good, she will believe it. Then she will grow old to deal with experiences herself, based on your teachings and whatever she learns and see on her life. (remember, kids are "programmed" to do and absorb what the parents say when they are young) as we, unlike zebras, cannot deal with the world ourselves. Its nature.

Also, one can love somebody, but one cannot protect that somebody forever.

Sex is good. Sex is healthy. Kids, a beautiful human being gets created in such act, so, its not bad. Its up to us and how we deal with it.

[Anona Miss]

How would my dealings with women have anything to do with what men may want to do to my potential daughter??

Your dealings with women are relevant to whether or not you will ever have a daughter. Or a son, for that matter.

Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me.

If you feel it is disrespectful, all you have to do is refrain from treating any women in what you have defined as a disrepectful manner and you will have eliminated the possibility of reproduction. Thus, you will not have a hypothetical daughter to worry about.

Unless, of course, you exempt yourself from that reasoning. Or you plan to go with in vitro.

[changos]

Women like sex. Really. We really do. Happy consensual sex is not a violation, not a disrespect.
Totally true, I just want to add this: on a book, from a psychologist mentioned how the "be-careful" attitude of the parents affected some girls who finally got old being afraid or too cautious about sex. Then, suddenly, on one night (her first time) they have to deal somehow with the idea and fact that "sex suppose to be fun". Some develop problems to experience orgasms. What I'm trying to say is one cannot afford being to cautious there, as it becomes a mess when you try to enjoy it.

[Valiyn]

Don't look at me for too much advice.....

If I ever have a daughter she would 1) know how to use a weapon before she could walk. 2) Know the general theories of warfare. and 3) brought up to believe that there are 10 essential rules any potential boyfriends must agree to or they are an ass that isn't worth her time.






Even an ESFx can learn all of those before kindergarten in case any horny males develop early. *loads shells in various shotguns and a few mortars while cackling*
Ok, so I will never actually stop her or make her overly cautious. But she'll be well versed in what to look for in a mate and atleast will be taught how the pros and cons of each type of relationship and how to spot them. Can't stop the sex, but make her well aware of what a good relationship is and how to find whatever her preferences are.

[altoid]

How would my dealings with women have anything to do with what men may want to do to my potential daughter?

Your dealings with women would relate to the potential existence of this potential daughter...

Just accept the fact that, should you have a daughter, she will most likely have sex someday. As others have said, consensual sex is fun for women too. I have never seen it as a disrespect.

[Sesshoumaru]

I don't quite understand how people can see sex between two consenting adults as disgusting, it's not like it's some unnatural act.

I mean the desire to reproduce (Which kind of involves intercourse) is built in to our genetics is it not?

[guardian789]

I agree with Nikita.

[SRVcardsfan27]

Your dealings with women are relevant to whether or not you will ever have a daughter. Or a son, for that matter.



If you feel it is disrespectful, all you have to do is refrain from treating any women in what you have defined as a disrepectful manner and you will have eliminated the possibility of reproduction. Thus, you will not have a hypothetical daughter to worry about.

Unless, of course, you exempt yourself from that reasoning. Or you plan to go with in vitro.


I understand what you're saying. With men and sex, I don't see any disrespect coming from it from the woman's point of view, although I know it does exist. But, I don't see it as the same when it's reversed. Basically what it boils down to is the scum that is the male can become when testosterone gets the best of him. I can see if a man was seeking a loving relationship with sex not a main priority, it isn't disrespectful. However, I don't feel it's like that in many instances. Women are taken advantage of too much. I may be coming off as a hypocrite or sexist by my opposite take on men, but it is unintentional. Just a part of my neurotic tendencies, I suppose.

I get what everyone else is saying, and thanks for the replies. Just wanted to throw this topic out in the air and get some feedback. Thanks so far, everyone.

[countrygirl]

How would my dealings with women have anything to do with what men may want to do to my potential daughter?

If you raise your daughter with self-esteem, respect and love, being a part of her life and by your example of how your treat your wife, you will have effectively taught her what kind of man she most likely should be involved in. You can not, no matter how much you love her, make those decision for her when the time come.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I don't quite understand how people can see sex between two consenting adults as disgusting, it's not like it's some unnatural act.


I don't either, I'm really talking about the respect issue. I realize it's natural and don't really see it as disgusting. My point in the original post was that it is disgusting to think of me in a sexual act with another man, and not necessarily women doing it with men.

I know the reason behind all of the orthodox opinions; I'm not oblivious to how it's suppose to work, just curious as to how others may view the topic. Also was looking to see if anyone had kind of the same thoughts as me.

All in all, again, this is curiosity, not a personal dilemma.

I'm sure if I ever were to have a daughter, I wouldn't be as concerned about it as I am coming off to be here.

[Anona Miss]

I'm not sure how you can have a loving relationship if sex is not a main priority. Otherwise, the relationship would be a friendship, would it not?

In your original post, you mentioned you were not sure about your daughter having sex, even were she married. Now you are saying that in a loving relationship, it isn't disrespectful. I don't then see where your issue is with sex in the context of marriage. Surely, you want your daughter to be able to fully express to her husband how much she loves him? And I bet you'll want grandchildren.

As for other situations, you and her mother will have to instill enough self respect into your daughter that she will reject sexual advances from any man she feels is simply using her to service his own needs. Women with a strong sense of self are rarely taken advantage of...though everyone may make the occasional mistake.

[wotsamattaU]

If I'm reading this correctly, he's seeing it as disgusting because he (knowing the male's viewpoints, drives, etc.) is trying to put himself in the female's shoes in order to gain perspective and understanding.


My thoughts are possibly based on the fact that I'm a straight male and think of myself in terms of a sexual act with another man and to me that's disgusting....

If you look at it that way then yep, the idea of it is disgusting. Remember back to when you first knew about the sex act - looking at it as something new, how gross the idea seemed to be?

I'm with Nikita. I don't understand why men would want to place themselves in random women. Particularly those who would be considered high risk for transmitting sexual disease. It seems a very weak thing to be a slave to such a drive, but then again - it is different for women. We have to bear the brunt of the resulting consequences should pregnancy occur.

I also waited for the right one to come along. He is my husband, he was respectful - I would not have it any other way.

Valiyn wrote:

If I ever have a daughter she would 1) know how to use a weapon before she could walk. 2) Know the general theories of warfare. and 3) brought up to believe that there are 10 essential rules any potential boyfriends must agree to or they are an ass that isn't worth her time.

I'd love to hear those 10 essential rules. Seriously - great idea.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I'm not sure how you can have a loving relationship if sex is not a main priority. Otherwise, the relationship would be a friendship, would it not?

All right, you're right. What I mean is that it isn't primarily based on sex. Of course, if it were, it wouldn't be a loving relationship.

In your original post, you mentioned you were not sure about your daughter having sex, even were she married. Now you are saying that in a loving relationship, it isn't disrespectful.

That original post wasn't getting to the roots of anything. It was just a general opening that was to be expanded upon if need be. What I'm trying to say is when thinking about it, it seems disrespectful although my rational mind tells me it really isn't. It's just something I think about and ask myself.

I can see it both as respectful and disrespectful depending on what we're talking about.

[Sesshoumaru]

I'm with Nikita. I don't understand why some men would want to place themselves in random women. Particularly those who would be considered high risk for transmitting sexual disease. It seems a very weak thing to be a slave to such a drive, but then again - it is different for women. We have to bear the brunt of the resulting consequences should pregnancy occur.

Edited

Personally, on one level, I don't see why either, why risk it and why have sex with a random woman just for the sake of sex?

What irks me more are those people (men or women) who are already in a relationship and commit adultery, but that's another topic.

[SeaCzar]

Nikita, agreed.

If you raise your daughter with self-esteem, respect and love, being a part of her life and by your example of how your treat your wife, you will have effectively taught her what kind of man she most likely should be involved in. You can not, no matter how much you love her, make those decision for her when the time come.

Change the gender here and the same is true. I have three kids, all boys, 22, 20 & 18. All have been brought up as above.

I will agree with you on one thing, though. IMHO, boys are easier than girls as kids. I guess I think this because of so many weird, undesirable guys out there.

[countrygirl]

I will agree with you on one thing, though. IMHO, boys are easier than girls as kids. I guess I think this because of so many weird, undesirable guys out there.

LOL! However I don't think so. To raise any child to become a loving, responsible adult may seem difficult. Each gender has its issues.

[Autoptic]

I guess I think this because of so many weird, undesirable guys out there.

As someone who resembles that comment I notice you really don't know much about women, do you?

[Synamon]

One of the topics that I think about a lot is the aforementioned women and sex. With guys, we are generally driven by it and most of us crave it (although I know many in here, including myself, aren't really like this). My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

My thoughts are possibly based on the fact that I'm a straight male and think of myself in terms of a sexual act with another man and to me that's disgusting.... However, I think the main problem is that in society, men are supposed to be the dominant type, and can manipulate many things. Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me. Not to mention the other acts that were once taboo in this society that men enjoy today.

I don't have this same problem when I think of having sons though, because the way I view society, I don't see them as the ones being violated.

Anyone care to share their thoughts? I'm specifically interested in viewing the females' responses, though men feel free to chime in as well.

Have I traveled back in time a century or two? Trust me, you don't want my response.

[SRVcardsfan27]

Have I traveled back in time a century or two? Trust me, you don't want my response.


I'm open to anything. I'm not partial to my neurosis regarding this. I know my perception of the topic is wrong and it stands against my libertarian views, but it's something that sparks debate in my mind. No view is going to offend me. I want them.

I agree with you on the time reference. It shouldn't be a problem, and it really isn't, just a thought.

[ChristopherL]

One of the topics that I think about a lot is the aforementioned women and sex. With guys, we are generally driven by it and most of us crave it (although I know many in here, including myself, aren't really like this). My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

My thoughts are possibly based on the fact that I'm a straight male and think of myself in terms of a sexual act with another man and to me that's disgusting.... However, I think the main problem is that in society, men are supposed to be the dominant type, and can manipulate many things. Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me. Not to mention the other acts that were once taboo in this society that men enjoy today.

I don't have this same problem when I think of having sons though, because the way I view society, I don't see them as the ones being violated.

Anyone care to share their thoughts? I'm specifically interested in viewing the females' responses, though men feel free to chime in as well.

I'm gonna go ahead and assume you are a virgin.

Most women LOVE the dick. They like being fucked, not made love to, fucked.
So how is it disrespectful to a give a woman the thing they love?

The rest of your post is far too insane for me to address.

[SRVcardsfan27]

I'm gonna go ahead and assume you are a virgin.

Most women LOVE the dick. They like being fucked, not made love to, fucked.
So how is it disrespectful to a give a woman the thing they love?

The rest of your post is far too insane for me to address.


:laugh: Thank you. By the way, I'm not a virgin.

[noueux]

The heteronormative, "sex is something that men do and women have done to them" attitude around PiV sex is altogether off-putting, to me.

I read this one column once (ever read Savage Love?) about a man who found out his daughter was in a BDSM relationship with her husband (as a submissive) and didn't approve of it or like it. Savage told him, basically, "Get over it." Just as it wasn't that father's right to know anything about his daughter's sex life with her husband, it's not my right to know or to judge anything about anyone else's sex life.

I generally think of sex as a form of communication, which helps me to see it as an act not about putting penises in vaginas, or about making babies, but about making people vulnerable and intimate, and cultivating that intimacy and vulnerability in a relationship (even one that only lasts for a night) is completely the domain of the people in that relationship.

[ChristopherL]

I admit that one of the reasons I've chosen to wait until I find the right person is that I cannot imagine allowing someone who does not love and respect me inside of my body. I also don't entirely understand why a lot of men would choose to put themselves inside of random women because they really have no idea what's going on down there and what might be festering inside of her. The way I see it, anyone you enter or allow to enter you is forever connected to you in some way. I realize this might not be a shared point of view, but it does swim around my head on occasion.

You're making mountain out of a molehill.
Most people have forgotten a good number of former partners.





ChristopherL added to this post, 1 minutes and 17 seconds later...

The heteronormative, "sex is something that men do and women have done to them" attitude around PiV sex is altogether off-putting, to me.

I read this one column once (ever read Savage Love?) about a man who found out his daughter was in a BDSM relationship with her husband (as a submissive) and didn't approve of it or like it. Savage told him, basically, "Get over it." Just as it wasn't that father's right to know anything about his daughter's sex life with her husband, it's not my right to know or to judge anything about anyone else's sex life.

I generally think of sex as a form of communication, which helps me to see it as an act not about putting penises in vaginas, or about making babies, but about making people vulnerable and intimate, and cultivating that intimacy and vulnerability in a relationship (even one that only lasts for a night) is completely the domain of the people in that relationship.
I'm of the opinion that you don't really know a woman until you've fucked her.





ChristopherL added to this post, 3 minutes and 50 seconds later...

It's just something I think about; I don't obsess about it or anything, it's curiosity more than anything. I understand how society perceives sex and women and I know that women obviously enjoy it enough to do it, but it's something I still wonder about because I see it differently.

I should introduce you to my ex.
You'd die of deyhdration in a week.

Seriously, women for the most part love it, I don't see why it has to be cast as some kind of burden that they accept.
In fact I think women generally enjoy sex more than men.

[noueux]

Most women LOVE the dick. They like being fucked, not made love to, fucked.

Did you know that most women have orgasms through clitoral stimulation, and actually relatively few have orgasms regularly with only vaginal stimulation?

[ChristopherL]

Did you know that most women have orgasms through clitoral stimulation, and actually relatively few have orgasms regularly with only vaginal stimulation?

Thats a question of the males skill and nothing else.
If you walk into sex with a statistic in your head you'll be on the path a to a self fulfilling prophecy.

Knowing how to fuck is a skill like anything else, you dont just stick it in and go at it.

The most stimulating part of a woman I have found is not the clit, or the g-spot or anywhere all the quacks write about.

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

See the image in the upper right.

Well that is kind of dead center in the vagina and downward when the women is one her back.

Massaging that spot well in most women will make them cum.

Find that spot with the tip of your penis and hit it just right and boom! you now have a stalker.

You probably don't agree with me, but thats because you've spent more time in your head than in the pussy. Trust me fucking is the way to go.

[Squirelznflight]

I'm not sure how you can have a loving relationship if sex is not a main priority. Otherwise, the relationship would be a friendship, would it not?

That's what some people see romantic love as: the ultimate friendship, total trust. It's like "Storgic" love from that love styles test.

[Valiyn]

*takes notes*

[Autoptic]

See the image in the upper right.

Well that is kind of dead center in the vagina and downward when the women is one her back.

Massaging that spot well in most women will make them cum.

Find that spot with the tip of your penis and hit it just right and boom! you now have a stalker.

Are you being sarcastic? Hitting the cervix is supposedly quite uncomfortable.

[noueux]

You probably don't agree with me, but thats because you've spent more time in your head than in the pussy. Trust me fucking is the way to go.

Whether sex is a totally animal act, or whether it's mostly in the head, is a question for another day (and subjective, anyway, in my opinion) but suffices to say, I've done a fair amount of experimenting, and have also done a fair amount of talking with my friends about sex, and I've never met a woman who enjoys being battered in the cervix.

I'm sure, though, that it has something to do with your almighty penis, so I'll not argue with you.


EDIT: By saying I've never met one, I'm not saying one doesn't exist. Just that, in your experience, they seem to be common, but in my experience, they're pretty extremely rare.

[amberlinen]

Thats a question of the males skill and nothing else.

If you're so confident about this and don't want to be treated as an idiot. I suggest that you start an empirical study with the experimental group being a random sample of women who have been treated with your divine skills, and a control group being women who've only met the ordinary penises. The result could liberate the human race from such a huge area of ignorance.

[demaugustus]

If you're so confident about this and don't want to be treated as an idiot. I suggest that you start an empirical study with the experimental group being a random sample of women who have been treated with your divine skills, and a control group being women who've only met the ordinary penises. The result could liberate the human race from such a huge area of ignorance.

Cervix et. al.

...can't wait to read the abstract.

[Firebrand]

I admit that one of the reasons I've chosen to wait until I find the right person is that I cannot imagine allowing someone who does not love and respect me inside of my body. I also don't entirely understand why a lot of men would choose to put themselves inside of random women because they really have no idea what's going on down there and what might be festering inside of her. The way I see it, anyone you enter or allow to enter you is forever connected to you in some way. I realize this might not be a shared point of view, but it does swim around my head on occasion.

I agree with this to a large extent. The only stipulation I make is that if you haven't found someone ideal and yet you still have a high sex drive, then a fuck-buddy could meet that need while maintaining your freedom, time, and space. Then if you find that ideal person, you could stop having sex with them, and wait with the ideal person putting a large enough gap between times to make it special with the ideal.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 7 minutes and 33 seconds later...

kids are "programmed" to do and absorb what the parents say when they are young
Yes, this is what is traditionally done but it does not always take. There's 2 ways to brainwash yourself. One is externally, the other is internally. External being parents, religion, school, peers, friends/family. Internal being yourself. Besides, I know plenty of people who, based on how their parents were in some aspect, sought to be the exact opposite and succeeded. It depends on how self-aware you are and how aware you are of someone trying to program you.





Firebrand9 added to this post, 1 minutes and 37 seconds later...

My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

You could always try the line from the movie "Clueless" on her boyfriends. "I have a .45 and a shovel, you won't be missed".





Firebrand9 added to this post, 4 minutes and 58 seconds later...

Women are taken advantage of too much. Every person is responsible for looking out for themselves and that also includes looking out for liars, manipulators, and assholes. Also, men aren't taken advantage of for their resources such as ability to provide shelter and money? Relationships in part are an exchange of resources. As long as it's equitable, no one will feel taken advantage of.

[seoa]

My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me.

so it's only me that finds it somewhat concerning that you're thinking of your hypothetical daughter in sexual terms already...?

i realise that a good parent will teach their son /daughter to respect others, and to expect /demand respect for themselves... focus on that, rather than thinking of penises inside your child... that's just a bit too graphic & specific to be healthy...

(and if you really just wanted to talk about whether women enjoy or endure sex, there's no need to focus that conversation around your innocent little girl :))

[Firebrand]

Did you know that most women have orgasms through clitoral stimulation, and actually relatively few have orgasms regularly with only vaginal stimulation?
You know it's possible to contact both simultaneously, right?

[Vagrant]

I think people are funny about the way we think about gender.

All people are humans. Unless I've been left out of the loop.

Most humans want similar things, last I checked.

So I think it's kind of silly to think women are somehow different than men besides physiology.

[seoa]

You could always try the line from the movie "Clueless" on her boyfriends. "I have a .45 and a shovel, you won't be missed".
ha ha - i was also contemplating quoting from Clueless on this one, re: casual sex - 'you've seen how fussy i am about my shoes, and they only go on my feet'

so much wisdom in only one film :laugh:

[Firebrand]

Well that is kind of dead center in the vagina and downward when the women is one her back.
.

The G-spot is along the front wall, anywhere from 1/2 to 2/3's of the way up, not on the cervix.

[Lucid]

to first address the OPs post:

Yes, women like sex. It's not something that we endure patiently and wait to be over. We like it quite a bit. Also, and this is important, all the things that men want to do to women, all the ways men talk about women when women are not around, women do the same thing to men. All the things men think when they see an attractive female pass them on the street are the same things that women think when we we an attractive male pass us on the street.

Both genders have an equal likelihood to be shitty and disrespectful, or to encounter someone of the opposite gender who is shitty and disrespectful. Women are not taken advantage of any more often than men are. I would be more concerned that a hypothetical daughter of yours would grow up fearing men and being socially conditioned to be a 'helpless female' who could be taken advantage of than anything else.

Make sure you raise her to know the difference between sex and love, make sure you raise her to be in control of her own sexuality and to undestand that she gets to choose who she has sex with and under what circumstances and for what reasons.

To address the question of the female orgasm:

Studies have shown that noueux is correct. It is not, in fact, entirely a matter of the skill of the male. Quite a bit of it is related to the particular woman's anatomy. Recently, it has been shown that women who are able to experience vaginal orgasms have a slightly thicker anterior vaginal wall. It is speculated that the vaginal orgasm is actually just stimulation of the back of the clit from the inside, and is thus just a clitoral orgasm.
However, the female orgasm is a topic that is only recently been given a lot of attention by science and we still don't fully understand it. Hopefully as sciences advances in this field so will the female orgasm.

But right now, no most women don't experience vaginal orgasms. Only clitoral.

And yeah, the cervix is NOT the G-spot and if you repeatedly bump the cervix with your penis it is actually EXTREMELY painful and unpleasant. It's actually painful in a way that makes one somewhat nauseous as well. Ramming the cervix is VERY bad form.

[demaugustus]

Both genders have an equal likelihood to be shitty and disrespectful, or to encounter someone of the opposite gender who is shitty and disrespectful.

I worked in a women's clothing department a year or so right after high school. I had women pinch my ass, stick their hands down my pockets and feel me, and flirt with me outrageously some times...Mostly cougars though - some rich hot cougars, some disgusting. There were some fellow women employees my age who I could have dated, but the more aggressive cougars kept me distracted. I think the job really helped get me out of my shell in certain respects; but, at the time, it was sometimes rather humiliating.

[Lucid]

I worked in a women's clothing department a year or so right after high school. I had women pinch my ass, stick there hands down my pockets and feel me, and flirt with me outrageously some times...Mostly cougars though - some rich hot cougars, some disgusting. I think the job really helped get me out of my shell in certain respects; but, at the time, it was sometimes rather humiliating.

Yeah, the crappy thing is that there's this bizarre social idea that men want sex all the time from anything with a vagina and will respond positively to being groped, fondled or otherwise disrespected by strange women. I always thought of what if the situation were reversed and it was a male doing the groping and all that to a female he didn't know. There would be outrage. The same standard should apply to both genders. Nobody likes having their genitals groped in public by strangers.

Ok, most people don't like it.

[invicta]

One of the topics that I think about a lot is the aforementioned women and sex. With guys, we are generally driven by it and most of us crave it (although I know many in here, including myself, aren't really like this). My main problem is, if I ever had a daughter, would I really want her to be having sex, even if she were married?

My thoughts are possibly based on the fact that I'm a straight male and think of myself in terms of a sexual act with another man and to me that's disgusting.... However, I think the main problem is that in society, men are supposed to be the dominant type, and can manipulate many things. Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me. Not to mention the other acts that were once taboo in this society that men enjoy today.

I don't have this same problem when I think of having sons though, because the way I view society, I don't see them as the ones being violated.

Anyone care to share their thoughts? I'm specifically interested in viewing the females' responses, though men feel free to chime in as well.

Women are sexual beings just as men are. Realize that sex should be a mutually enjoyable experience, and is not a power game and your problems, discomforts, and fears should subside on their own. I know that some people believe that getting laid is some kind of hero's triumph in which the male takes something from the female, and his pleasure is the goal. Once you start seeing sex as a mutually beneficial experience your preemptive hostility toward men dating your future daughter might lessen. You'll probably become a much better lover yourself as well.

[Kisai]

. Nobody likes having their genitals groped in public by strangers.

Ok, most people don't like it.


I was about to say... ;)

[Frodis]

Even then, the idea of someone sticking their johnson in a female, even though it is natural, still seems disrespectful to me.

Hmm, so penetration = violation? Maybe like an invasion of personal space, like sticking your finger in someone else's nose? I can see that...I'm female, and if I think about sex in those terms (and I sometimes do), I do feel violated or at least imposed upon - like I must welcome a unexpected guest into my home.

If you must think about your fictional future daughter's body, maybe it would help to think of the vagina as a "trap" or "snare" with which we capture poor innocent penises and suck the life force from bumbling idiot males. :) Kidding...well sort of. Thinking of the female as the one holding the power - which in the case of sex, we often do - might alleviate your concerns.

Sorry if I seem a bit flippant. I try not to take sex -or anything- too seriously. It's served me well over the years.

[Anona Miss]

Hmm, so penetration = violation? Maybe like an invasion of personal space, like sticking your finger in someone else's nose? I can see that...I'm female, and if I think about sex in those terms (and I sometimes do), I do feel violated or at least imposed upon - like I must welcome a unexpected guest into my home.

If you must think about your fictional future daughter's body, maybe it would help to think of the vagina as a "trap" or "snare" with which we capture poor innocent penises and suck the life force from bumbling idiot males. :) Kidding...well sort of. Thinking of the female as the one holding the power - which in the case of sex, we often do - might alleviate your concerns.

Sorry if I seem a bit flippant. I try not to take sex -or anything- too seriously. It's served me well over the years.

I know you are being purposely flippant, but I am reminded of the actions of some girls I knew in college.

They used to have a game in which they'd go as a group to a campus bar. One of them would scan the room and pick a guy. The remainder of the group would estimate how long it would take her to get him to go home with her. A girl would get bonus points is she allowed her friends pick the guy for her instead of choosing one herself.

I do not remember an incident where the girl picked the guy herself and did not succeed. If the girl allowed her friends to do select the guy (and they would always pick someone who seemed unapproachable or was there as part of a group that included girls), she was still successful more often than not.

[ChristopherL]

The G-spot is along the front wall, anywhere from 1/2 to 2/3's of the way up, not on the cervix.
I didn't claim it was.
Learn to read.





ChristopherL added to this post, 1 minutes and 46 seconds later...

If you're so confident about this and don't want to be treated as an idiot. I suggest that you start an empirical study with the experimental group being a random sample of women who have been treated with your divine skills, and a control group being women who've only met the ordinary penises. The result could liberate the human race from such a huge area of ignorance.
I'll get right on it.

[seoa]

I know you are being purposely flippant, but I am reminded of the actions of some girls I knew in college.

They used to have a game in which they'd go as a group to a campus bar. One of them would scan the room and pick a guy. The remainder of the group would estimate how long it would take her to get him to go home with her. A girl would get bonus points is she allowed her friends pick the guy for her instead of choosing one herself.

I do not remember an incident where the girl picked the guy herself and did not succeed. If the girl allowed her friends to do select the guy (and they would always pick someone who seemed unapproachable or was there as part of a group that included girls), she was still successful more often than not.

erm... 'succeeded' at what??

being able to sleep with a college guy, without requiring any form of effort from him, or any commitment on his part...?

hardly a challenge, i would have thought...

[Vagrant]

erm... 'succeeded' at what??

being able to sleep with a college guy, without requiring any form of effort from him, or any commitment on his part...?

hardly a challenge, i would have thought...

Yeah, I have to say.

If you find a college guy at a bar, chances are that he's not an INTJ, one of the few types where a man is capable of saying no to an attractive woman. :p

It would take a fair amount of intelligence and restraint from a guy to say no -- something not commonly found in college guys in bars.

[44sunsets]

But, I don't see it as the same when it's reversed. Basically what it boils down to is the scum that is the male can become when testosterone gets the best of him. I can see if a man was seeking a loving relationship with sex not a main priority, it isn't disrespectful. However, I don't feel it's like that in many instances. Women are taken advantage of too much. I may be coming off as a hypocrite or sexist by my opposite take on men, but it is unintentional. Just a part of my neurotic tendencies, I suppose.


A lot of men have these "neurotic" thoughts. I used to have them -- I would get disgusted whenever I heard of someone having sex with lots of girls, which inevitably included lots of my female friends. I would think that the man in question was a dirty scumbag who took advantage of girls etc.

Eventually I came around and realised the truth. Women love sex -- the catch is, they're often not allowed to voice this in public without severe social repercussion. There's nothing wrong with a man and a woman having consensual sex -- in fact, it's a good, beautiful thing.

Society is pretty screwed up. It fills our minds with ridiculous nonsense which leads to these kinds of neuroses.


Seriously, women for the most part love it, I don't see why it has to be cast as some kind of burden that they accept.
In fact I think women generally enjoy sex more than men.

Agreed.

[Anona Miss]

erm... 'succeeded' at what??

being able to sleep with a college guy, without requiring any form of effort from him, or any commitment on his part...?

hardly a challenge, i would have thought...


Yeah, I have to say.

If you find a college guy at a bar, chances are that he's not an INTJ, one of the few types where a man is capable of saying no to an attractive woman. :p

It would take a fair amount of intelligence and restraint from a guy to say no -- something not commonly found in college guys in bars.


Agreed. Though in their defense, these girls were quite young and not probably the brightest students there. I suspect they may not have realized what an easy task they had set for themselves. I do remember when I heard of it (I was 19), I was surprised that guys would do that so consistently.

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that Frodis's comment about thinking of the female as the one holding the power reminded me of these girls. In their minds, they were approaching the situation not as offering themselves up for violation, but as a power trip. Though these guys didn't really need to be persuaded, the girls felt that they were the ones in power, choosing a man and getting him to do what they wanted.

[ChristopherL]

Agreed. Though in their defense, these girls were quite young and not probably the brightest students there. I suspect they may not have realized what an easy task they had set for themselves. I do remember when I heard of it (I was 19), I was surprised that guys would do that so consistently.

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that Frodis's comment about thinking of the female as the one holding the power reminded me of these girls. In their minds, they were approaching the situation not as offering themselves up for violation, but as a power trip. Though these guys didn't really need to be persuaded, the girls felt that they were the ones in power, choosing a man and getting him to do what they wanted.

Of course they were the ones in power.

[F6M13]

Nothing like having a girl that wants it bad from you, only to turn her down and get pissed off that i didn't want to do her. Now that's a power trip right there. Probably made her feel real insecure and self conscience.

As much as my male hormones tell me to bang anything that moves, female of course, i'm not just sleeping with anyone. It feels good to have that kind of control over the demon within.

[SRVcardsfan27]

Thanks for all of the replies. This was a topic that on the (I guess, outer part of my mind), I knew was the only logical solution. I'm not out of touch with reality. Even deep down, I knew it was natural and healthy. I also knew that they enjoy it. Those weren't my inner mind's problems. It was just the way it seemed like women were taken advantage of, and instead of being in the lead role (which, I know many of you say they can be, which is true to the attitude extent) they just kind of let the man have his way.... well, at least he's the one with the rod and, thus, is the one who penetrates.

Hey, I enjoy sex, and you may see me as a hypocrite that I have these thoughts but still like it, but the thoughts just stayed there. This wasn't brought on because I'm a lunatic who is obsessed with having a daughter in the future and planning everything for her life, it was merely an example.

Your comments really have helped my inner mind come at ease with these thoughts, and most of them are justified now. Just to have other people sharing their thoughts is great. I was alone in these discussions for a long time.

So, case 1 of 741 is closed for the time being.