Let's Spread Rumors

[EmmaKynikos]

doesn't really have a lump hammer

[Fyrnae]

I broke all the hidden cameras ^ installed so she doesn't know it's right next to my front door.

[Aezur]

would like to experience the life of an hermit

[Fyrnae]

^ is trying to get me to join the order.

[Wry Satyr]

^actually founded the order under the pseudonym Artemis Leafletter.

[lamplighter]

^Handles all the PR of said order

[Fyrnae]

^ is the tea boy.

[jonnyb]

^Is one of the few people who have a legitimate use for zit juice, and pays well for it.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Banned from playing poker in two countries.

[Fyrnae]

Banned for banning my online poker opponent! Now who will I play against? :(

[Eye on Earth]

^ Makes spare poker chips in her free time.

< Gets how you make a living. Nods approvingly.

[Fyrnae]

^ does not know that we only play for play money

< never, ever gets threads mixed up.

[Minerva]

That is because Lady Leaf has a gambling problem. *LOL! Hi there!*

[datagirl]

^counter-phobic obsession with cats

[lamplighter]

^Scams people with a psychic hot line pyramid scheme like Ms Cleo.

[Wry Satyr]

^offers free drinks to go with said psychic scheming scams.

<ex-wife was involved with said Ms. Cleo psychic scam.

[Fyrnae]

^ spits in the drinks

[lamplighter]

^Only serves nonalcoholic beverages at parties.

[Fyrnae]

...at ^'s request.

[Artio]

^ Showed me where the hidden bottle is.

[Fyrnae]

^ helped me drink it after everyone went home.

[Cooper]

Stalks midget trolls

[Minerva]

Makes trolls look like Cary Grant. *LOL! :p Just kidding!*

[Fyrnae]

^ is currently dating a troll. She says he lets her cross his bridge for free, amongst other perks.

[Wry Satyr]

enjoys being perky on moonlit nights in the woods.

[Fyrnae]

^ deliberately keeps his house cold to cause 'perkiness' in any female guest.

[Cooper]

was a member of Monty Phython

[lamplighter]

^Was rejected when he auditioned for Monty Python

[Fyrnae]

^ is an actual trouser snake python.

[datagirl]

this is what happened when Fyrn forgot to feed her pet snake
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[Cooper]

Makes chocolate cookies with Ex-Lax

[datagirl]

^like his with rainbow sprinkles

[lamplighter]

^Only contains malicious data.

[Fyrnae]

^ modelled for the Hermit trump in the tarot. Not the Hermit himself, just the lantern. To this day, few know of his fame.

[GrnEyz]

planted pot seeds in the neighbors garden...

[CaptainAwesome]

^Smokes pot regularly and is high even now

[GrnEyz]

thinks pills are much more convenient

[Fyrnae]

^ snuck in and stole my harvest disguised as a copper on a raid.

[Cooper]

trains tadpoles to do the back stroke...

[envirodude]

Has a pet rabbit he calls "Mr. Fluffy Wuffy" ... under his hat.

[Fyrnae]

^ boiled it.

[Cooper]

thinks she is sneaky

[Fyrnae]

^ thinks he is clever

[WoodsWoman]

^can't understand why water insists on running down hill.

[lamplighter]

^Is worried that one of the monkeys we sent into a space a long time ago will comeback and form the Planet of the Apes, and enslave humanity.

[datagirl]

^owns the complete collection of Planet of the Apes (both on DVD and the original VHS edition)

[Dung]

Stuck on Janet Leigh's impersonation

[Eye on Earth]

^ Refuses to wash his tutu.

[WoodsWoman]

^has no idea why anyone could possibly believe the world was round.

[Cooper]

has a great rescipe for raccoon pie

[WoodsWoman]

^is a deacon at the local Baptist Church.

[Cooper]

runs a raccoon puppy farm

[Eye on Earth]

^ Owns a racoon farm. It's right next to the tire store.

[lamplighter]

^knows this because it's between the tires store, and his sex doll service shop. No hole too big, and no crust too thick for him to take care of! And always, every doll is personally test driven by him to insure quality.

[INTroJect]

^ got the name from farting on lamps

[lamplighter]

^Got the name copying someone else

[WoodsWoman]

^has a fetish for after dinner mints.

[Cooper]

does not like cookies

[WoodsWoman]

^bedroom is done up in vibrant shades of pink.

[lamplighter]

^Is going for the longest belch in the Guinness Book of world Records whilst reciting I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General.

[Cooper]

Lights the lamp with bourbon

[Loud Silence]

^likes getting high on the smell of tires

[jonnyb]

^flosses her teeth with Romex.

[BellaBianca]

^Collects stuffed teddybears.

[jonnyb]

^Is too concerned about safety; she keeps taking the teddybears that have springs and wire frames inside away from me.

[MortalWombat]

^ typically uses those wires and springs to make explosives.

[GenessorDios]

^'s sworn enemy and polar opposite, MortalWambot, is a very promiscuous cyborg.

[Loud Silence]

^has helmet hair

[GrnEyz]

^got drunk and knocked over two mailboxes and three garbage cans on the way home from a rowdy poker game.

[Wry Satyr]

^^got off easy since she should have lost her shirt, but ^ chipped in to keep it clean.

[WoodsWoman]

^can't see the forest for the trees.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Hangs a Do Not Disturb sign on her own bathroom door when she goes inside.

[GenessorDios]

Not satisfied with just one clone, ^ got to work creating a trippelganger to complete his plan for the hottest threesome ever.

[PS4H]

^^ Is formulating the virus to start the Zombie Apocalypse.

[Eye on Earth]

Gave up on trying to find the one ring and is now searching for that one special rock.

[envirodude]

Deathly embarrassed of his "man-boobs".

[Fyrnae]

^ plays with his and is so fond of them I hear they have pet names.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Calls hers Frick and Frack!

[Fyrnae]

^ plants sound recording devices in my flat. Bloody ninjas.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Her cats tell me everything.

[lamplighter]

^Has delusions that common house cats can talk to him.

[Fyrnae]

^thinks my cats are common

[Artio]

^ chills pretty much on the hill. :)

[Fyrnae]

^ is watching my movements. Quit it, you stalker! ;)

[Eye on Earth]

^ Has always been wary of when her cats wake her up in the morning by staring at her.

[Cooper]

is a pink nosed boy toy....

[Eye on Earth]

^ Has an Arby's burger fetish. Extra pickles please.

[Cooper]

Arby's yes, pickles...no.

EoE, so I hear, has a third nipple...

[Eye on Earth]

^ Calls EoE's friends funny names.

How'd you know that???

[Cooper]

I also heard, well, that EoE....has, well....an extra toe.

[envirodude]

Tells women "it's huge" but is only referring to his post count.

[datagirl]

^showing off his new sex toy

[GettingBetter]

^creates sex toys

[jonnyb]

Among other things, ^ is also getting better at using sex toys.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Can't seem to find his sex toy.

[Fyrnae]

That's because ^ pinched it.

[Eye on Earth]

...and I gave it to ^.

[lamplighter]

^Is the owner of said sex toy company, and was checking it for long term reliability.

[EmmaKynikos]

has a diaper fetish

[GettingBetter]

^wears diapers so she won't have to go to the ladies' room so often

[EmmaKynikos]

thinks the washington monument looks like a giant pencil

[Eye on Earth]

^ likes to drive because she thinks auto-fellatio is a sex act that happens in cars.

[GenessorDios]

How hypocritical of ^. He used to think the same act was called carnilingus.

[envirodude]

Dios mio! ^ no habla español.

[Fyrnae]

^ makes up rumours about himself just for the attention.

[datagirl]

^obsessed with leafy, green phallic symbols

[EmmaKynikos]

wanders around her neighborhood pushing a shopping cart and wearing only a raincoat and singing "Happy birthday"

[GenessorDios]

^ got so good at orgies that she was promoted to General Ménager.

[Eye on Earth]

GD was promoted to Chief Executive Boffister after getting caught having sex with a Volkwagon Beetle.

[GettingBetter]

^got caught having sex with his Volvo, because ... well ... he just got confused.

[GenessorDios]

^ is allowed to keep his name as long as he keeps shilling for that multivitamin corporation.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Cut his nose shaving his nose hairs. Twice.

[Fyrnae]

^shaved his legs with that razor, dulling it beforehand.

[PS4H]

Got stuck in an air duct once while on a secret assignment for the government.

[Fyrnae]

^ promised that she wouldn't tell. Now I have to kill her for blowing my cover.

[envirodude]

^ secret agent code name "hard hat"

[Eye on Earth]

^ all his secret agent colleagues call him "Tiny."

[GenessorDios]

^ was offended by a friend at a party once. He left in a huff, then came back half an hour later, laxative in hand.

You think I'm a party pooper?! I'll show you a goddamn party pooper! he shouted before popping the pills and squatting over the punch bowl.

[Eye on Earth]

^ His parents once told him that if he failed he needed to try and try again if necessary. No matter how hard he tried, the refrigerator door never said it loved him. He is heartbroken to this day.

[GettingBetter]

^believes that wearing Silly Hat will give him enough super powers to take over the world.

[Cooper]

not really getting better....

[Eye on Earth]

^ Not really getting an Arby's burger right now.

[Cooper]

(I wish)

Loves strange hats

[Eye on Earth]

^ Was the only one in town who went to the ZZ Top Convention.

[Cooper]

Doesn't know a good band when he hears one...

[Eye on Earth]

^ Doesn't recognize a psionic hat when he sees one.

[Fyrnae]

^ kisses his mirror at home.

[Cooper]

^ kisses mirrors in public

[Fyrnae]

^ kisses jonnyb in private

[Wry Satyr]

often thinks about jonnyb's privates.

[Fyrnae]

^ takes snapshots of people's privates.

[jonnyb]

^makes a good energy tonic from ader venom by boiling it while stirring with a pure silver spoon.

[Fyrnae]

^ orders it from me by the caseful.

[EmmaKynikos]

has a thing for the easter bunny

[GenessorDios]

^ is anatomically flawed; she has a toe growing out of each knee.

[reiven]

GD's dad told him if he does a good deed, he will become a real boy.

[Wry Satyr]

Reivan is still looking for the ring so he can be invisible and not be reminded of his squandered youth when seeing his reflection.

[Artio]

^ Visits the forum too rarely to know the difference between reiven and Reivan.

:gorgeous:

[Wry Satyr]

^Hasn't sent me a a plane ticket to join her frolics around the polar caps.

[Artio]

^Thinks I'm a millionaire.

[Wry Satyr]

^thinks I'm a giggalo.

[WoodsWoman]

^spends too much time on INTJf - there's a Cathedral somewhere needing your services.

[datagirl]

^WW's {{{}}}s are actually choke holds

[lamplighter]

^Wets her bed from dreams of Charlie Sheen

[EmmaKynikos]

Was in the same rehab as charlie sheen. Same results, too

[lamplighter]

Oh yeah, now I remember you. Weren't you one of the porn stars that came over for that?

[EmmaKynikos]

Harbors sexual fantasies about his mother

[lamplighter]

Harbors sexual fantasies about her opossum.

[vad1981]

Doesn't know where Bourbon Street is and has never been there...

[Fyrnae]

^'s ceiling is full of holes

[vad1981]

^Doesnt feel as close to the earth-mother as once did

[Fyrnae]

^ spotted my faerie wings

Note to self: hide them better

[datagirl]

^ has a crush on a fairy

[Fyrnae]

^ likes to crush faeries

[datagirl]

^ proud owner of a new QVC Faerie Juicer

[EmmaKynikos]

confused hersey's chocolate syrup with blood

[Fyrnae]

^^ knows just how efficient they are, but finds crushing more satisfying.

^ prefers it herself

[lamplighter]

^Is technically a cannibal since she eats faeries.

[GenessorDios]

^ hates to say the word gnome because he's unhappy about someone possibly earning an extra g off him.

[Wry Satyr]

^ thinks a com-puter is for verbal communication in the nether regions.

[datagirl]

^ has oedipal obsession with his motherboard

[EmmaKynikos]

once knitted a hat using cat hair

[jonnyb]

^Uses her braids to play jumprope with the neighbors.

[GenessorDios]

^ thinks Coca-Cola is made from cocanuts.

[Wry Satyr]

^thinks testicles are ice on one's nuts.

[jonnyb]

^Prefers stalactites on his testicles.

[Fyrnae]

^ has testicles on the brain -- he's nuts.

[lamplighter]

^kicked him so hard in the groin, that his testicles were relocated to his brain.

[EmmaKynikos]

Was his high school's class president

[WoodsWoman]

^never did figure out how to properly parse a sentence.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Envies Michael J. Fox because she thinks he has a cool name.

enveis
envys
inveis
invies
ynveis
ynvies

I hate English!

[envirodude]

Can never remember if it's "i before e" or "i after e" ... wierd, but true.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Missed that day in school when the teacher said it was I on E. All the kids laughed.

[GenessorDios]

^ has a thing for terrestrial charged particles.

[Cooper]

knees are rusting out...

[Fyrnae]

^ brain went that way ages ago

[Dusk]

Fyrane assisted in the assassination and defamation of the radio star.

[Fyrnae]

^ directed the video

[lamplighter]

^Directed Caligula

[Artio]

^ Can't find a job as a Caligula impersonator.

[Fyrnae]

^was rejected at the tryouts for cast members

[GenessorDios]

^ forgot to feed her cat for two days so it ate her avatar.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Stuck in a snow bank.

[GettingBetter]

^tried to rob a snow bank.

[GrnEyz]

^made a yellow deposit in a snow bank

[Cooper]

really has brown eyes

[Eye on Earth]

^ Makes regular brown deposits in the snow bank.

[EmmaKynikos]

at night, puts his glass eye on top of a globe. hence his name...

[Fyrnae]

^ runs around frightening small children for fun

[Eye on Earth]

^ Secretly wants to be a barrister.

[Cooper]

took being a roach too far...now he is awake all night

[Eye on Earth]

^ Is secretly preparing to put me in a giant microwave to test out the roach in a microwave theory.

[Cooper]

believes rumors

[envirodude]

^ Will never again outpost me by a 100:1 margin
(the tide has turned...)

[Eye on Earth]

^ Is the only number nerd here. Snicker, snicker.

[Artio]

^ Runs around NYC. Every night. After some berries. And roaches. Wearing his silly blue hat.

[Wry Satyr]

^canters around the Arctic in search of bears wearing only a smile.

[Fyrnae]

^ follows her with a video camera, making David Attenborough wildlife documentary-style comments as he goes along.

[WayWatcher]

^ Has a hitlist.....and a Hammer

[Fyrnae]

^ is next for exposing that fact

[Eye on Earth]

^ Sometimes wishes Greymalkin would fart when she has guests visiting just so she can prove how much it reeks.

[TypeINTP]

^ Pays hookers to mutilate him with a kitchen fork while he plays WOW with a model of a naked female goblin.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Sells kitchen forks and offers free demonstrations on how to use them.

[Cooper]

does not know how to use a fork

[Eye on Earth]

^Thinks chopsticks are only useful for poking food.

[Cooper]

uses chopstick to help....well..... it stand up.








His plant you gutter mind!!

[Eye on Earth]

^ Uses duct tape and a two inch nail to provide complete support.

[Cooper]

hangs out in the shadows of Central Park.....farting.

[reiven]

cooper is well know for his work in the choreography for cheech marin's rock and roll scene for up in smoke

rumor has it the tutu was his idea, too.

[GenessorDios]

^ wishes every day that he could be the star of the show Everybody Loves reiven.

[WoodsWoman]

^founded the NAPA Auto Parts chain.

[Wry Satyr]

^^ would sit glued glued for hours watching staticy reruns of Everybody Loves reiven while chewing synthetic finger nails and chain smoking dried fiber optics - waiting to find out what happens next.

^sniffs plants just to make herself sneeze violently.

[WoodsWoman]

^has an entire library of books all printed before 1900.

[Wry Satyr]

^desires me to read to her from the original Decameron.

[TypeINTP]

^Never really read the books in his library, just uses them to hide his Japanese pornos and pictures of cats being molested!

[EmmaKynikos]

despite years of practice, still can only tie his shoes with bunny ears

[Eye on Earth]

^ Despite years of practice, she still hasn't mastered her velcro shoes.

[TypeINTP]

^Actually wears Velcros as the Math of shoelace was too much!

[Eye on Earth]

^ Skipped shoes and went straight to flip flops. The toe thing is still a problem though.

[envirodude]

^ Published author: Everything I ever needed to know in life I learned from my avatar (EoE 2011).

[TypeINTP]

^Read Earth's book and it changed his life!

[Wry Satyr]

^desparately misses his home world.

[GrnEyz]

^excitable gargoyle

[Eye on Earth]

^ Excitable human.

[Artio]

^ Has an excitable mouse.

[Fyrnae]

^ is just plain excitable

[Wry Satyr]

^is filled with enui

[Eye on Earth]

^ Horny.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Was served breakfast in bed by two women.

[Artio]

^ Made up the whole thing.

[Fyrnae]

^helped him write the script

[Eye on Earth]

^ Was the project director.

[Fyrnae]

^ had to smile for the whole shoot and his face got stuck like that.

[Eye on Earth]

Spent all day with an amatuer photographer once and ^ was all she had to show for it.

[TypeINTP]

^ Paid the amateur photographer to set Fyrnae up.

[Wry Satyr]

^propositioned the photographer for a lap dance.

[TypeINTP]

^Is the photographer.

[Wry Satyr]

^is a pole dancer at a biker bar that caters to gender-challenged men.

[Fyrnae]

^ was getting jealous so learned the fine art of transformation into and out of pole form.

[envirodude]

^ too self-conscious to ask for the bar's address

[Fyrnae]

^ only gives false addresses so he can have the show to himself

[Wry Satyr]

^Mapquested the bar so she could make an improptu appearance and have an amateur tryout.

[lamplighter]

Prefers watching Fyrn when she's at home, and doesn't know he's there.

[Fyrnae]

^installed the hidden cameras (which I've located and destroyed, btw)

[GenessorDios]

^ thinks an electrophile is someone who trolls alleyways looking to take advantage of naively negatively charged particles.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Combines words like former President Bush and makes verbs out of them.

[lamplighter]

^that wolf face is his really his face as well, secretly lycanthrope.

[GrnEyz]

morphs into a lamp post in order to hang out at exotic locations without paying.

[Eye on Earth]

^ Is using an illegal fuel grade in his cars.

[IotaNull]

^ looks at every member of INTJf showering by spy satellite.