Let's Spread Rumors

[gestalt]

Nikita assassinated a big old piece of cake recently.

[Nikita]

gestalt impregnated his mother recently.

[Reganon]

On a scale of 1 to cuddly, Nikita breaks the scale.

[Nikita]

On a scale of 1 to evil, Reganon doesn't exist.

[Reganon]

Nikita is so cuddly that anyone who looks at her turns to jell-o

[Nikita]

Reganon is so cute that if you pinch her cheeks kittens fall out of her ears.

[gestalt]

Nikita is secretly in deep doo-doo with her Obersturmbannführer. She can't stop saying his name, rank and title.

[Reganon]

Kitten is Nikita's favorite flavor of ice cream...

...and gestalt is obsessed with rank. He lives for his next promotion.

[Nikita]

gestalt is Reganon's favorite flavor of lollipop.

[Reganon]

Nikita won't stop licking her gun.

[gestalt]

For Reganon, Lollypop is code for young woman's dream.

[Nikita]

Reganon won't stop licking toads, in the hopes that one will materialize into her Prince. She's convinced that mere kissing isn't intimate enough. Who knows what she'll attempt next....

Gestalt is one such toad....

[Reganon]

Nikita was once mistaken for a toad.

[Nikita]

Reganon collects roadkill.

[Reganon]

Nikita collects the broken hearts of her past boyfriends.

[gestalt]

This Fathers Day, Reganon got down in Karaoke: I wanna kiss you all overrrrr, and overrrr againnn. Topping off her performance with shaking her bust and tapping her fake mole.

[Nikita]

gestalt got a job as a midget stripper.

[gestalt]

Nikita is a midget.

[Nikita]

gestalt decorates all of his clothes with gobs and gobs of rhinestones and sequins.

[Reganon]

Nikita doesn't have any clothes to decorate. She's a nudist by choice.

[Nikita]

Reganon's a nudist by court order.

[gestalt]

Nikita is partial to potpourri.

[Nikita]

gestalt is partial to furry pot.

[Reganon]

Nikita was the judge.


edit: man I'm slow...

[Nikita]

Reganon goes into her yard every night wearing an aluminum foil hat, begging to the heavens to send her "people" back.

[gestalt]

Reganon yoinked, busted.

[Reganon]

Gestalt was busted for having an affair with an Alaskan Senator.

[gestalt]

Reganon reads other people's e-mail.

[Reganon]

Gestalt makes it too easy. He doesn't even encrypt his messages.

[gestalt]

Reganon thinks steganography is something you do with tupperware.

[Valhalla]

Gestalt listens to schlager music.

[Bobsama]

Hates cute little kittens.

[Valhalla]

Really wants to be where the bunny is.

[Bobsama]

Wants to hug me to her bosom.

[Minerva]

Bob wants to use my bosom as his pillow.

[Bobsama]

Wants to smother me in her bosom.

[Minerva]

Bob has different ideas for my bosom...

[Bobsama]

Needs me to have a few different ideas.

[Minerva]

Wants to try out all his ideas on me.

[Bobsama]

Especially likes the idea involving rope and a blindfold and ...

[Minerva]

Bob also wants to use honey and maple syrup.

[Bobsama]

Wants to be all lapped up.

[Minerva]

Bob is hoping I chose him for the job.

[Bobsama]

Only considers one name on the list.

[Cooper]

forged list

[Minerva]

Taught Bob how to do it.

[Bobsama]

Is hungry

[Minerva]

Bob wants me to slake my hunger on him.

[Bobsama]

Is eying my hot dog.

[Minerva]

Wants me to grab and have his frank.

[Bobsama]

Doesn't want a bun with it.

[Minerva]

Wants me to supply the buns.

[Bobsama]

Wants to use pillows.

[Minerva]

Bob thinks that pillows would provide him with a better angle.

[Bobsama]

Is worried about depth

[Minerva]

Has no problem where length is concerned.

[Cooper]

Will use a tape measure to verify

[EmmaKynikos]

is the next profile on 'hoarders'

[Cooper]

is the next profile on "intervention"

[EmmaKynikos]

tried out for 'wheel of forture' but couldn't pass the entrance exam

[Cooper]

^couldn't find the entrance

[EmmaKynikos]

sets mouse traps so that he can have some meat for dinner

[Synapse]

^Has a fetish towards mouse traps (especially placed strategically on the toes).

[EmmaKynikos]

plays a harp in a string quartet

[jonnyb]

^Jump ropes with her braids.

[Cooper]

^jumps rope with others peoples hair....yep, that hair

[Nikita]

Cooper jumps rope with his armpit hair and then smacks girls in the face with it.

[Cooper]

sells her leg hair for wigs, every two weeks

[EmmaKynikos]

thinks he has betty davis eyes

[Cooper]

^kills threads for hours

[MassHysteria]

^is purposefully mean to people's coats

[Cooper]

throws rocks at puppies

[INTroJect]

^The culprit for those really nasty unflushed public toilets

[Cooper]

^can't find the light switch

[INTroJect]

<better than looking at ^

[Cooper]

^ it really a blindfold....*hears guns being cocked*

[MassHysteria]

^keeps blindfolds and guns handy just in case

[Cooper]

Didn't read the fine print

[MassHysteria]

^Never reads between the lines.

[Cooper]

^never reads

[MassHysteria]

^Burns books. Not the naughty ones or the interesting ones. Just... whatever's around.

[Cooper]

^burns down dog houses for money

[INTroJect]

Still wearing the same clothes for the past 2 days

[MassHysteria]

^Burned down his own dogs' doghouses and made them watch.

[Cooper]

roasted marshmellows over the coals

[MassHysteria]

^Swept up the ashes and lined the litter box with them, again forcing the dogs to watch.

[INTroJect]

^Drives a bright pink ford Fiesta

[Nikita]

TheLoneINTJ has constructed his identity around INTJ type profiles, but actually tests as an ISFP, if he answers honestly.

[INTroJect]

I would question why Nikita is here, being that she is profiling herself as an INTP in an INTJ forum... but be careful not to call her a lurker because she is very "sensitive" about it.

[Cooper]

wants a night light

[Fyrnae]

wants to kill the light

[Cooper]

is afraid of the light

[Fyrnae]

Transfers his phobias on to others

[Cooper]

herds cats

[INTroJect]

keeps trying to come up with something good to say about my avatar. But is still failing.

[Fyrnae]

wants to be a cat so that he'll receive some attention, even if it is only being herded.

[Cooper]

meow

[INTroJect]

Balding, horribly, and had a really bad hair implant surgery.

[Fyrnae]

Is so ugly he daren't be seen

[Cooper]

^^there is a reason for no lights on in that house

[INTroJect]

Also trying to come up wiht something good to say about my avatar and failing miserably

---------- Post added 06-23-2010 at 03:05 AM ----------

See that green leaf in her avatar? Yeah. She actualy falls for buying all that overpriced eco-friendly bio-degradable junk at target.

---------- Post added 06-23-2010 at 03:06 AM ----------

Darn im out of sync with my rumor posts...

[Cooper]

^is alone in the dark

[Fyrnae]

^ can see in the dark, but is so horrrified by what's in Lone's avi he's been struck speechless.

[INTroJect]

Wow. ^finally came up with something good but it sure took a long time...

[Cooper]

^made me look

[INTroJect]

^One of those gullible guys who girls tell him that the baby is his. He falls for it every time. Thinks he has like 4 of them. They dont even look like him.

[Cooper]

^Mr Black

[Fyrnae]

that's because they look like ^^

[Cooper]

^thinks its only four

[INTroJect]

^drives around in one of these. Its called a twike. Total geekmobile. Cant get a date but doesnt know why.

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

[Fyrnae]

^thinks Cooper has a need to date

[INTroJect]

Hey, I took a look in the system archives and found Fyrnae's old avatar.

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

[Fyrnae]

That's actually a picture of his girlfriend

[Cooper]

sucks her thumb in her sleep

[Fyrnae]

would rather have that pleasure, and it's not my thumb, if ya know what I mean

[Cooper]

forgot the forum is not x rated

[INTroJect]

And here's cooper hard at work before he found himself collecting unemployment.

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

[Fyrnae]

^^ thinks insinuation should be x-rated

[Cooper]

^^ thats Lone in the photo


^likes it that way

[Fyrnae]

^ thinks I'm obsessed and has gone off me

[Reganon]

Fyrnae is convinced Cooper only speaks in code and spends all her time attempting to decrypt his every statement.

[Nikita]

Weganon talkth wif a lithpth and otho thpeech dithodoth becauth she liketh the attenthion.

[Reganon]

Nikita speaks in pig latin because she thinks it makes her sound smart.

[Nikita]

Reganon speaks in latin to pigs because she thinks it makes her their queen.

[Reganon]

Nikita is really a drag queen.

[Fyrnae]

Nikita will shortly be going to war with Reganon over the throne & regalia.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae is really a prostitute catering exclusively to drag queens.

[Reganon]

Nikita conducts all sorts of experiments on prostitutes, all in the name of science.

[Fyrnae]

Reganon supplies the lab equipment.

[WayWatcher]

^ Sells the data

[gestalt]

Waywatcher lives under a bridge.

[Nikita]

gestalt smells as if he lives under a bridge.

[gestalt]

Nikita makes slurpee sounds with cocoa-butter when she gets her hands on it.

[Nikita]

gestalt injects himself with Red Bull.

[gestalt]

Nikita drinks Full Throttle - Red Bull is a girl's drink.

[Cooper]

^collects butterflies

[Nikita]

Cooper combs the planet for cocoons and sets them on fire, intent upon destroying butterflies before they ever get a chance to fly.

[gestalt]

Cooper collects pygmy skulls.

[Cooper]

just now figured that out

[gestalt]

Cooper is lost in his own hype.

[Cooper]

^ I have heard that he farts in the bath tub pretending its a hot tub

[gestalt]

Cooper was once sodomized by a faucet handle.

[Nikita]

gestalt reenacts the chimney sweep dance and song from Mary Poppins every Tuesday and Friday with his burlesque posse of drag queens.

[gestalt]

Nikita plays women like she plays the piano.

[themuzicman]

gestalt wishes he was GI Joe

[gestalt]

themuzic is also known as the bugle boy.

[Nikita]

gestalt actually wishes he could be G.I. Jane.

[gestalt]

Nikita shaves.

[Nikita]

gestalt shaves his pubic hair then superglues it onto his scalp to cover up the balding.

[gestalt]

Nikita shot first.

[Nikita]

The first time gestalt shot a pumpkin he broke down into tears and said a prayer over his pumpkin pie that it rest in peace.

[ptrout]

^has a tape floating on the internet, still trying to make on to TMZ

[gestalt]

Nikita once shot an elephant gun and lost her left breast because of it.

[Nikita]

ptrout's avatar is a cartoon fx version of what he is currently doing to gestalt, and gestalt is moaning like a banshee out of hell.

[gestalt]

Nikita mewled something about virility last time she told her boss what's up.

[SuperSmart101]

Gestalt decides to kill a fly. Then he cries because he believes he is a serial killer, and to make up for his murder he buries the fly in his backyard and denies whole incident.

[ptrout]

Get his ass kicked daily by Tyler Durden

[Nikita]

ptrout lacks independent inspiration for rumors, thus he steals from Hollywood, just like Hollywood steals from everywhere else.

[ptrout]

Refuses drink after the "duct tape-cockroach-torn panties" night with Jeanelle

[Nikita]

ptrout is using this thread as material for pornographic literature.

[gestalt]

^ really did try slapping someone around with a large trout one time.

[Nikita]

gestalt is really that member who used to trout slap newbies.

[ptrout]

Nik uses this thread like guys use baseball statistics or rosie o donnel

[gestalt]

^ chases the flies and maggots out of roadkill. It's sustainable.

[Nikita]

gestalt ties puppet strings to his dates and yanks on the strings until they start losing limbs.

[gestalt]

Nikita talks to her hand full of lipstick.

[Fyrnae]

gestalt gave her the lipstick. Said it matched the colour of her eyes when they start to glow like that.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae experiments with hate brainwashing techniques on small children she kidnaps from the streets.

[SuperSmart101]

Nikita believes two objects can occupy same space at same time by running over people in a hummer and hoping they survive.

[Nikita]

SuperSmart101's personality is inspired by Dr. Evil, but his monologues read more like My Little Pony character descriptions.

[gestalt]

Nikita's first word was "Honcho" - and after that there wasn't any shutting her up.

[Nikita]

gestalt can't swim...he fell into a plastic kiddie pool the other day and was screaming and crying about how he was going to drown, until a little girl told him to just sit up.

[gestalt]

Nikita wanted to be a Spice Girl so bad.

[Nikita]

But gestalt got the gig instead.

[SuperSmart101]

Gestalt uses this forum as a way of making himself believe he has a life.

[gestalt]

SuperSmart101 wouldn't know genius if it gave him a mushroom tattoo on his forehead.

[Nikita]

gestalt really wants to give SuperSmart101 a mushroom tattoo on the cheek...he's begging in reps right now.

(I'm going to bed, night!)

[gestalt]

Nikita has an ass like old oatmeal.

[Minerva]

Gestalt rides an ass to work.

[MassHysteria]

Minerva has an ass like 50 pounds of chewed bubble gum.

[Cooper]

^thinks she is bullet proof

[MassHysteria]

^Said some truly upsetting things while tied by the Lasso of Truth.

[Cooper]

^had a funny reaction to that

[MassHysteria]

^Laughed at my blend of confusion, intrigue and terror.

[Cooper]

^loves to hear that evil laugh

[Fyrnae]

Cooper thinks laughing evilly makes him popular with the ladies.

[Cooper]

^ is very suseptable to my evil laugh

[Fyrnae]

^ wants that to be true

[Cooper]

^ (its true...she is)

[Fyrnae]

^can't prove anything

[Cooper]

^forgot I have audio tapes

[MassHysteria]

^Actually sounds like Dr. Evil with a head cold, but Fyrn is too nice to say anything.

[Fyrnae]

MH doesn't want me to know that she likes the sound of that.

[MassHysteria]

^Fyrn doesn't realize that it's her laughter which is music to my ears.

[buttbuttmcgutt]

^ doesn't like wonder woman and tried to shoot her.

[jonnyb]

^Kifed the invisible jet.

[Fyrnae]

^ wanted to fly the invisible jet naked due to his exhibitionism.

[Cooper]

^flies invisible Faeries

[Fyrnae]

^ flies in the face of reason.

[Cooper]

^tea towels innocent flies

[Fyrnae]

^ loves to hear the crack of the tea - towel whip. Those houseflies never stood a chance.

[Cooper]

Likes to ban me

[Fyrnae]

Indeed. From my bedroom, you are banned.

[Cooper]

^forgets I've never been there

[Fyrnae]

^ forgets about the cameras in our laptops

[Cooper]

^uh, your the one that......crap, it was me. Nevermind.

[Fyrnae]

Hey ^ -- gotcha.

[Bobsama]

is wearing old underwear.

[Fyrnae]

^ would never be crass to a lady.

[Cooper]

^thinks I'm charming

[Bobsama]

Is disgusting

[WoodsWoman]

Seems to be able to dish it out but not take it.

[jonnyb]

^often leaves home with shoes on her hands.

[Cooper]

^ works for the KGB

[gestalt]

^ signs his love letters, "Yours Truly, Cooper, Man'o'War"

[Cooper]

^eats small rodents deepfried

[plotthickens]

Big C does very odd things late at night under the covers with microwave popcorn.

[Cooper]

taught a class on that very thing, "Fun and games with popcorn"

[plotthickens]

Took the class and was CREEEEEEE-PY!

[Cooper]

^hates Crees

[plotthickens]

I think all watercourses are lovely. Stay off the bad acid, Big C.

[Cooper]

^can't tell a Cree from a creek

[Fyrnae]

^ eats faeries. Meanie.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae eats faeries in a very different capacity....

[Reganon]

Nikita eats twice her own weight every meal.

[Nikita]

Reganon eats newly hatched birds while their mothers are off getting food for them. She likes to display her baby-bird-decorated teeth to the mothers before crushing them with her hands.

[Reganon]

Nikita shot the little bluebird on her shoulder because its song was prettier than her own.

[Nikita]

Reganon's sister can't have babies, so she offered to be the surrogate mother...she's getting down and dirty with her brother as we speak.

[Reganon]

Nikita is faith healer like Rasputin. She convinces people the only way to redeem their souls is to commit original sin with her.

[jonnyb]

Reganon trained for a time with the Hovitos but kept on accidentaly inhalling the poison darts into her mouth when using the blow tubes. The Hovitos had to let her go after an inordinate number of witch doctor healing dances were performed on her behalf.

[Nikita]

jonnyb holds the world record for the number of pool balls he can stuff up his butt, and also for how far he can project them in one push.

[jonnyb]

^Always has to one up someone. The latest case involves inordinate amounts of soccer balls and in a different crevase.

[Reganon]

jonnyb was the first person to visit all the five billion pornographic sites on the internet.

[jonnyb]

^Reaganon was the only familier face at all those sites.

[Nikita]

jonnyb once one a spelling bee...against pre-schoolers. He was laughed out of the kindergarten one.

[jonnyb]

What do you mean!? I win each year against the pre-schoolers.

^Nikita has interpersonal troubles stemming from her insistance to read and copy any and all dictionaries she came across for 12 hours each day between the ages of 5-24

[Reganon]

Nikita is a world class speller and everyone still laughs at her.

(Come on! I just pressed refresh)

jonnyb thinks he is a winner because his T-shirt says so.

[jonnyb]

^^see, even Reganon knows

[Nikita]

Nobody pays enough attention to Reganon to know whether there's anything laughable about her, except jonnyb who's currently stalking her because he wants to implant her penis onto his pelvis.

[jonnyb]

^Is the inspiration behind Freudianism.

[Nikita]

jonnyb inspired the poo in South Park, but that's his greatest achievement to date.

[Reganon]

Nikita's greatest achievement is going one night without wetting the bed.

[jonnyb]

Reganon, once lost from falling out of the station wagon in her first year, was found and raised by a pack of ferrell cats. She learned all the tricks of survival, mousing, and self cleaning. Her parents found her and had to keep her in a 55 gallon drum until she was too tired to fight then re-domesticated her. To this day, if Reganon gets pressured, she will subconsciously lick her hands are slick her hair back.

[Nikita]

jonnyb once coated himself in tar for a role in Porgy and Bess. Not only did his performance meet with crippling reviews, he was banned from his racial equality association.

[Reganon]

Nikita was fired for soliciting sex as a telemarketer.

[Nikita]

Reganon was hired for soliciting sex in her interview, and taking on the entire HR staff in one "session".

[Reganon]

Nikita has taken on the entire continent of Europe. Her vagina is now spacious enough to comfortably house a family of five.

[Nikita]

Reganon once tried to crawl back into her mother's womb when her mother was menstruating, thinking that this would provide extra lubrication for the journey "home".

[Reganon]

Nikita cannot resist drinking her own menstrual blood because she thinks it will make her a vampire.

[Nikita]

Reganon has to wax her back three times a week, otherwise you'd swear you're petting a furry puppy.