Let's Spread Rumors

[jonnyb]

^Is really Penny, Inspector Gadget's niece. She has a thing for her dog Brain. We just won't go there as this is a family forum.

[Minerva]

jb is in a bad mood. Seems like he and Inspector Gadget had a fight last night and so jb didn't get any.

[gestalt]

Minerva is part of world culture. So savvy.

[jonnyb]

^^Minerva commonly finds dog fur in weird places on her body.

^Gestalt almost got the rumor; I had pitty on him this time.

[Minerva]

Gestalt is trying to make me blush.

[Nikita]

Minerva bathes in dog saliva.

[Minerva]

Niki has a grip on many of jb's secrets and has no problem revealing them for money.

[jonnyb]

^^Nikita finds the only way to get clean is to use battery acid in a sponge bath.

^Minerva has a drawer full of bicycle handle bar grips that she insists her men use as condoms.

[Minerva]

jb uses concentrated Sulphuric acid to get rid of his bad breath, but still it persists.

[Nikita]

Minerva tried to use one of said grips on jonnyb, but he kept "falling out".

[jonnyb]

^^ Minerva single handedly raises the stock in lifesavers wintergreen division as she has OCD about her breath.

^Nikita wants to get ideas from Minerva.

[Minerva]

Niki wants jb as her lab rat since he is the product of nuclear fallout.

[gestalt]

Nikita uses one of those old man in a wheelchair pinchers when she's feeling rowdy (and can't reach the jellybeans).

[Nikita]

gestalt walks like a constipated old man with a hard-on.

[Minerva]

Nikita is evil, but so funny!

[jonnyb]

^Is turned on by skiddy tighty whities.

[gestalt]

Nikita has a spoon that injects milk into her 1/3-of-a-box-at-a-time Captain Crunch cereal-for-dinner meal.

[Nikita]

gestalt is too slow to ride the short bus.

[jonnyb]

^loves silkworms

[Minerva]

Jb doesn't know that I have a weakness for red lingerie because men get weak with desire when they see me in it!

[gestalt]

Minerva thinks she's a Valkyrie or a Norn or some shit.

[jonnyb]

^^Minerva doesn't know that I am immune to such finanglings.

^Gestalt only attends operas that have all fat ladies singing so that each subsequent performance seems like an encore.

[Nikita]

jonnyb chases dogs while wearing a pink tutu.

[Minerva]

Gestalt does not know his Mythology... seriously man, read!

jb is trying to sound macho. Good luck with that!

[GenessorDios]

^ received a grant for genetic engineering and when it was time for the first presentation, panicked and tied two cats together by their tails, calling it the world's first GM cat. Needless to say, bankruptcy and jail time soon followed.

[gestalt]

Minerva is crude and clever, and that, folks, is red, white and blue through and through. Say that dirty little word... AMERICAN.

[Nikita]

gestalt just made himself a gummy bear necklace.

[Minerva]

Bender is hoping I get put into his jail so he can be my warden. He has already picked out the lingerie he wants me to wear for him...

[jonnyb]

^Keeps gummy beers in her pocket cause she like them warm and lint coated.

[Nikita]

jonnyb's sperm tastes like pennies and rotten eggs...he's the only one who consumes it.

[jonnyb]

^Has her own personal Incubus at her beckon call. Too bad he communes with my personal sucubus.

[Nikita]

jonnyb pays bouncers to card him, but his dates just laugh and dump him on the spot.

[jonnyb]

^Nikkita wishes she could pay off the bouncers to card her; they just laugh her down.

[Nikita]

jonnyb's dates all laugh him down when he takes off his pants...not that he was ever exactly "up" to begin with....

[GenessorDios]

LASIK surgery was discovered by accident, after ^'s laser doomsday device was built with insufficient power and only managed to correct the eyesight of twenty assassins.

[jonnyb]

^Needed lasik to see his little anteanna.

[gestalt]

Nikita's favorite song is by Sweet Pussy Pauline - Work this Pussy (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.). One foot on the dresser, you big ugly bean-eating sonofabitch. *cowbell*

[GenessorDios]

Most experts agree, ^ is the leading cause of throat cancer in adults 18-49. Of course there are those who disagree, but fuck them right?

[Minerva]

Well we all know what Gestalt thinks about... Kitty, kitty and more kitty... Must be a man. :p

[Nikita]

So must Minerva....

[Minerva]

Niki is hoping that I am a man... She has been lusting after me for weeks now...

[Nikita]

Minerva bathes in pheromones to try and make herself irresistible.

[Minerva]

Niki wishes this was true... She can find no other reason for her feelings for me. She doesn't know that desire cuts through even the coldest of the NT brains. :p

[Nikita]

Minerva has been recently diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

[Minerva]

Niki made the diagnosis. She gave me a prescription of drugs that were really roofies that would make me hot for only her.

*Sorry I got to go... We'll pick this up later!*

[Nikita]

Minerva is really tying herself to my bed like a good girl.

[Valhalla]

Found out Minnie indeed had no penis and now feels sad.

[Cooper]

^is a 'furry'

[Valhalla]

Owns Sponge Bob Square Pants pajamas.

[Minerva]

Val has dead, worm riddled bunnies on her pajamas.

[GenessorDios]

Eight out of ten dentists in America believe that ^ is essential for oral hygiene, the other two can't believe there are only ten dentists in America.

[Minerva]

Bender is the 11th dentist who was exiled for recommending Listerine.

[Valhalla]

Used Listerine because she was told it was good for the skin.

[Minerva]

Val needs to use gravel to scrub her skin. Anything less than wouldn't clean her.

[Valhalla]

Minnie's feet are so huge, she lets her Doc Martens as a submarine.

[gestalt]

Valhalla likes seamen.

[Bobsama]

Prefers milk to beer.

[Minerva]

Bob likes milk if he can suckle it himself.

[Bobsama]

Is making a dubious offer.

[Minerva]

Wants to accept the offer.

[MassHysteria]

Makes offers like that all the time.

[Minerva]

Mass wonders why I never made her an offer.

[Bobsama]

Would be a bit freaked out if Mass accepted an offer like that.

[MassHysteria]

Min has blocked the first time she offered from her mind. Got in a bit above your head, eh little girl?

Bob is just mad that we didn't invite him along.

[Bobsama]

Wants to take a picture, for a picture lasts longer.

[Minerva]

Mass is really a 70 year old grandmother. The avatar is misleading.

[Bobsama]

Wants to tell me about when her blog party is on next.

[MassHysteria]

Min is really an 80 year old grandfather. We're stuck here at the same nursing home, using the computers in the business center. Min makes funny noises sometimes. Funny, upsetting noises.

[Bobsama]

Can't tell the difference between a lady and a tramp.

[gestalt]

Tramps about all the time.

[Minerva]

Gestalt is just a plain ole tramp...

[gestalt]

Minerva likes milkshakes.

[Bobsama]

Doesn't know how to treat a lady.

[Minerva]

Bob wants me to be his lady.

[Bobsama]

Wants me to give her a massage.

[gestalt]

Bobsama is good at giving massages.

[Minerva]

Gestalt has been watching Bob and me through his telescope

[gestalt]

Minerva is living in a yellow submarine. But who is her captain?

[Bobsama]

In fact, hates The Beatles.

[gestalt]

Bobsama is grasping at straws and coming up with nothing but a mouth full of turf.

[Minerva]

Bob wants to be my captain.

[gestalt]

Minerva is plotting ... dolphin shit.

[Minerva]

Gestalt is not a gentleman... He uses bad language in front of a lady.

[Bobsama]

Loves hot dogs on the grill.

[gestalt]

Minerva is 100 times better than a lady.

[Minerva]

Gestalt meant infinitely better! :p

[Bobsama]

"Infinitely" hardly scratches the surface.

[gestalt]

Bobsama plays to the crowd.

[Minerva]

Gestalt wants to be surrounded by a crowd

[gestalt]

Minerva is too intuitive for her own good.

[Minerva]

Gestalt is really an ESTJ. :p

[gestalt]

Minerva -might- be correct, as usual.

[Bobsama]

Couldn't hit the broad side of "correct" with a nuclear bomb.

[gestalt]

Bobsama secretly wants to annhilate the rainforests with a nuclear bomb, once he figures out the running-out-of-planetary-oxygen problem.

[Thirdie]

gestalt is studying the option seriously, since he's employed by Bobsama as a nuclear researcher.

[Bobsama]

Is the team manager.

[Minerva]

Bob is a team player.

[Bobsama]

Has never seen an INTJ be just a team member.

[Minerva]

Bob wants to be on my team, but the team must have only 2 members...

[Bobsama]

Likes to play tennis in pairs

[Minerva]

Wants to give me the racket.

[gestalt]

Minerva is guilty as charged of writhing uncontrollably.

[Bobsama]

Doesn't know the half of it.

[Thirdie]

Was too busy instigating a bee war against all of the above to actually care about playing tennis.

[sixpoint8]

Secretly wishes they were an ESFJ.

[Thirdie]

(*blasphemy D:*)

^ is a fellow gossip journalist on the INTJ boards.

[GenessorDios]

Why would someone wish for a million dollars rather than a billion? Well according to ^, you can just use your million to buy the billion so there's no point wishing off more than you can chew.

[Cooper]

^I heard there is an x-rated reason for that smile

[Bobsama]

Wants to watch a XXX movie with Lady Spring.

[Cooper]

^wishes he could star in one

[Bobsama]

Doesn't have the assets to appear in one.

[Cooper]

^hates it that my assets are larger then his

[GenessorDios]

If there's something strange
in your neighborhood,
who you gonna call?
^busters!

I ain't afraid of no ^
I likes the ^
YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH

[Seriously]

Has always been secretly jealous of the cowardly lion and straw man.

[GenessorDios]

Can I tell you guys a secret? ^ told me she doesn't know what a Snuffleupagus is! Can you believe that? Hahahahaha!

....

Okay I don't know either, what the hell is that thing?

[Seriously]

isn't aware that EVERYONE else does know what a Snuffleupagus is. How sad.

[Cooper]

^post and run specialist

[Nikita]

Cooper is a hit-and-run hitman.

[Fyrnae]

Nikita is on his hitman team.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae applied to be on the team, but she kept emptying bullets and sprinkling the gunpowder on her targets, claiming that "Faerie dust shall set you free of your evil ways!"

[Fyrnae]

Nikita steals boxes of ammo from the company stockroom.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae seduces the guards as a distraction while I break into the stockroom.

[WoodsWoman]

Fyrn enjoys chocolate so much she is actually the second largest shareholder in Lindt Chocolate Co. (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)

Nikita is the CEO.

[Nikita]

WoodsWoman is building an army of squirrel snipers to take out our company's competition.

[Fyrnae]

Nikita will be training them once they are assembled.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae will be feeding them...she's plenty nuts.

[GenessorDios]

Entrepreneurship comes easily to ^. She's been manufacturing knockoff Made in China harps to sell to heaven, but hasn't yet figured out a method of transportation. Hey, who said business comes easy, right?

[Fyrnae]

GD is working on a plan to help Nikita with her problem. I heard it involves a lot of....dispatching.

[Nikita]

Fyrnae requested a "dispatching" of the scales peppering her skin.

[Fyrnae]

Nikita is only too happy to oblige.

[GenessorDios]

^'s 'y' used to be 'ie' but she got tired of people pronouncing it as Fire-nay.

[Fyrnae]

^ is disappointed as he quite likes playing with fire.

[jonnyb]

^Tries to make certain children immortal by feeding them ambrosia and then throwing them into a fire fueled with Ash and Oak. Fails most times and has to take off running.

[Nikita]

jonnyb plays with fire every day...well, that's what happens when you have diseases that cause intense burning upon urination.

[jonnyb]

^One of Fyrnaes closet successes, Nikita only ages 0.98 days to most other mortals 1.

[Nikita]

jonnyb wears a bra that he stuffs with tomatoes for a softer, more supple feel.

[jonnyb]

^Likes to wear jock straps. Nikita believes she can start a fad by doing so; besides, they double as a slingshot for when she has to take her own game.

[Nikita]

jonnyb wears a collar and allows anything with boobs to put a leash on it.

[jonnyb]

^Nikita bought high end night vision goggles so she can see herself under the covers in the dark.

[Nikita]

jonnyb refuses to use such goggles because he is terrified of the view of his body in any light.

[Minerva]

Niki and I were comparing breast size with some other sexy girls on INTJf last night and jb is still angry that he was not invited to our little party.

*lol*

[Nikita]

Minerva offers to nurse the boys around here for free.

[Minerva]

Well that used to be the case before but now Niki is milking me dry!

[jonnyb]

^^Nikita is secretly Minerva. Dual membership.

^Minerva feels a need to boast her lactation capabilities.

[Minerva]

jb still angry as a hoard of Marabunta.

[Nikita]

Minerva wants to nurse on jonnyb, but he refuses to be treated like a dairy cow.

[Minerva]

Niki just made me vomit a little! *get's whip* :whip:

[jonnyb]

^Covers herself with post-it notes in the wee hours of the morning. (Made myself vomit a little bit)

[GenessorDios]

Ancient Incans have left behind a prophecy that one of ^'s eyes will be gouged out on March 14th, 2014 and soon after, will start a revolution to put an end to exclusionary 3D technology.

[Minerva]

jb wants to rip all the posted notes off with his teeth, but I used crazy glue that night. I would rather have krazy glue on my skin than jb.

GB gets brownie points.

[Nikita]

Minerva kidnaps Brownies and ransoms them back to their mothers.

[Minerva]

Niki is just annoyed that she didn't get my brownie points.

[jonnyb]

^Has clothing ensambles made from window screening.

[Minerva]

jb can't get out of his leather pants, they are so tight... has been having lots of problems with his little one... the sweat and other bodily fluid buildup has given him quite a nasty rash that there is no cure for.

[Nikita]

Minerva's arms are so short that she can't unclasp her own bra.

[MassHysteria]

Minerva saw it in the window and couldn't resist. (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)

[Nikita]

MassHysteria collects dildos and tests them out on her dog.

[jonnyb]

Nikita has a contract with duracell to provide her the amount of batteries that she requires.

[Nikita]

jonnyb requires batteries for his electric "massager".

[MassHysteria]

Nikita has been using toys for so long she can't get off without them. She always blames it on her boyfriends, though. Shame shame.

[jonnyb]

^Too timid to check out toys and shames others who aren't.

[Bobsama]

Is looking bad today.

[Fyrnae]

Mass likes to bring her own toys over to Nikita's. Last time she was there she got to use them not only on Nikita & herself, but also on jonnyb & Minerva.

[MassHysteria]

Fyrn still resents the fact that she wasn't there.

Oh, and JohnnyB CLEARLY has me confused with another chick named MassHysteria.

[Bobsama]

Fyrnae is lookin' good today!


Mass can't swim.

[jonnyb]

^^^I was knocked out and stuffed in some trunk. Must have been Fyrnae who did it so she could get in on the fun.

[GenessorDios]

Is it hot in here or is it just ^?

Well I guess it's him. He always cranks the heater up to desert-like temperatures in an effort to recreate a sauna in his room, yet he doesn't know why all his electronic items are malfunctioning.

[MassHysteria]

^GD doesn't realize that desert-like temperatures are actually pretty comfortable. It's not the heat, it's the humidity that'll get you.

[Fyrnae]

Mass wishes I had been there. Sorry babe, I'm taken.

[MassHysteria]

Fyrn has forgotten that most people she listed are involved as well. Get with the 21st Century already!

[GenessorDios]

Whenever cops need some guidance on how to chase down a perp, beat him to within an inch of his life and plant drugs in the event that it was a case of mistaken identity (or just some officers who needed to let off steam), there's only one name they trust to show them the right path, and that's ^.

[Minerva]

Banned for being the cop she beat down on.

[Bobsama]

Banned for posting in the nude.

[GenessorDios]

^'s brains have been scrambled at the thought. Specifically the thread recognition lobe. Yeah, that's a thing right?

[Fyrnae]

^ is only jealous because he didn't get a private show.

[Minerva]

Bender's circuity got all scrambled when he drooled all over himself. He was looking at the nude picture I just got banned for.

Lady Spring used high classed cameras from all the way in the UK and got a free show.

[Fyrnae]

Minerva likes to be an exhibitionist. It gave her secret pleasure to know I was watching.

[Minerva]

Lady Spring doesn't know that I only get pleasure if the viewer is male besides she runs around in the nude with her fairy helpers ALL the time.

[Thirdie]

^ is one of her fairy helpers.

[GenessorDios]

Samael himself dares not contend with ^ when she's in a bad mood, that's how much of a temper and foul mouth she has.

[Minerva]

Thirdie is the new kid on the block. Doesn't realize that we Ladies don't serve each other. We play together, ensnare men, use them for their money and leave the men heartbroken without a prayer in the world.

[Fyrnae]

^ transfers what she does with men on to all other women. No wonder so many nice girls can't get a date.

[jonnyb]

^Planted a date tree at some point in her life.

[WoodsWoman]

^thought cemeteries were casket gardens.

[Minerva]

Plants caskets like flowering plants.

{{{WW}}}

[WoodsWoman]

^Harvest them for me.

{{{Min}}}

[Minerva]

Gives them to Cooper.

[Bobsama]

Is a cannibal

[Minerva]

Wants to eat me... He thinks I am brown sugar.

[Bobsama]

Tastes like chocolate

[Minerva]

Loves chocolate and wants to be my bar of white chocolate.

[Cooper]

bathes in blue

[Minerva]

Coop doesn't bathe. :p

[Bobsama]

Loves rolling around in hay.

[Minerva]

Wants to be my hay partner.

[Bobsama]

Wants me to work around the farm.

[Minerva]

Bob wants to be the stud of my farm.

[Bobsama]

Wants me as her stud.

[Minerva]

Bob thinks he has the goods to keep me satisfied happy.

[Cooper]

barks at dogs...so I hear

[Minerva]

Cooper wishes he had my skills to talk to and understand dogs.

[Cooper]

(no shit)

thinks my dogs are insane...ok, thats true

throws grapes at cats

[Bobsama]

Is actually a cat whisperer.

[Minerva]

Bob whispers sweet nothings in my ear.

[Bobsama]

Wants to be a slave--my slave.

[Minerva]

Bob kisses my ring and licks my feet.

[Cooper]

likes to mud wrestle

[Nikita]

Cooper likes to lick Minerva's feet after she mud wrestles.

[Minerva]

Niki wishes that was her job.

*Hi Niki*

[Nikita]

Minerva is confusing me for Cooper again...not that I minded last night. :flirt:

(;))

[Bobsama]

Banned for not sharing the video.

[Minerva]

Bob wanted to join us when making the video.

[Bobsama]

Enjoys me.

[Valhalla]

Is narcissistic to the point of sticking flowers up his nose and posing as an elm near the creek.

[Bobsama]

Always climbs me.

[Nikita]

Bobsama is 2 inches tall...you don't climb him so much as you step over him.

[Reganon]

Nikita stepped on him because she has no concern for [no idea what that thing is] life.

[Nikita]

Reganon picked up his broken body and dismantled it as a scientific endeavor.

[Reganon]

Nikita is a devout scientologist.

[Bobsama]

Mistakes science for scientology.

[Reganon]

Bobsama mistakes faith for science.

[Nikita]

Reganon just makes mistakes...constantly, and without fail.

[Reganon]

Nikita is a perfect angel who has finally achieved her life's ambition to wear white robes and play a lyre all day every day for the rest of eternity.

[Nikita]

Reganon developed a master plan to take over hell and extend the campaign to heaven, but when faced with an angel dressed entirely in white, she screamed and burned.

[Reganon]

Nikita's face turned Reganon to stone before she could finish her campaign.

[Nikita]

Reganon was already made of stone...I just exposed her secret.

[gestalt]

Nikita isn't a leader, she's a manager.

[Reganon]

Nikita, on the other hand, is made of rubber.


And Gestalt is just a lowly accountant.

[Nikita]

gestalt couldn't manage his bowel movements, but Reganon relishes the task.

[gestalt]

Nikita has milk in her moustache.

[Minerva]

Gestalt desperately wants to lick all the milk off Niki's body.

[Reganon]

...but finds he cannot because Minerva beat him to it.

[Minerva]

Reganon is a lactard even with her own milk.

[gestalt]

Minerva wants to get it on, in bathtub full of jell-o.

[Minerva]

Gestalt wants that jell-o for dessert.

[gestalt]

Minvera wants the first, second, and third course. And her salad turned to boot!

[Nikita]

gestalt wants to be dessert...but that would result in massive stomach pumping.

[Minerva]

Niki has a weakness for sweet dessert. She put on ten pounds in the last week! :p

[gestalt]

Nikita's hero is Sinead O'Connor, that old head.

[Nikita]

Minerva and gestalt are working off some calories right now...guys, you're seriously going to break the bed.

[Minerva]

Niki broke her bed on her own... She doesn't need a partner for that!

[Bobsama]

Broke in my bed for me.

[Nikita]

Bobsama ties up young girls in his basement and performs unspeakable acts of sadism on them.

[gestalt]

Minerva comes at her opponents like a spider monkey.

[Nikita]

gestalt is trying to woo Minerva by utilizing a combination of B.O. and B.S.

[gestalt]

Nikita still plays patty-cake.

[Nikita]

gestalt plays only by and with himself.

[Reganon]

Nikita is a voyeur of voyeurs.

[gestalt]

Nikita thought she was being fierce by drawing a line in the sand, too bad it wasn't her sandbox.

[Nikita]

Reganon hung gestalt from a high rise balcony by his ankles when he dared to call her his "cuddly wuddly poo".